I don’t really have any close friends in the city I’m in. I’m not new, it’s by design. People like me, I just don’t like to get close. Unless I have specific uses for them (career, sex, resources), then it’s not worth the time and energy investment (based on my calculations). I’d rather just study and be otherwise productive. This generally means I stay in alone on big holidays like today. Not sure if this is something I’ll regret at an older age though. I don’t think so since a primary function of these events is hookups and parties which I have an overabundance of. However, I realize I have a severe shortage of camaraderie, feelings of belonging to a group, and emotional bonds with anyone or anything at any level. It’s like everyone has a utility value that’s plugged into a subconscious equation that determines my suggested level of engagement with this party. Note: I don’t believe I have anxiety or social introvert problems. I go to lots of festivals and events, and do it all over the world. Who else feels like this? If so, please share how you’re like this. If you’re older or experienced, can you offer advice as to what I might be missing out on or should watch out for? Happy fourth :)
same boat here. nyc based! "I’d rather just study and be otherwise productive. This generally means I stay in alone on big holidays like today."
Same
Sad
You're clearly too good for society and have achieved another plane of existence.
That’s what I thought when I left facebook after seeing what good it (and its members) was doing for society.
I see where you are coming from. I'd say it gets harder to make "true" friends with age, so the longer you keep people at a distance the harder it'll be to develop a relationship with someone that goes beyond a specific use case. Sure, I have my skiing friends and poker friends, but I also have a couple friends who I know will be there when I need them most. I think it's about allowing yourself to be vulnerable with a handful of people who are closer to you than your average friend.
I’m trying to change it and get a cute girl friend who understands my leetcode needs.
What you’re seeking has a contradictory dynamic: a general inverse correlation between a girls cuteness and depth of understanding leetcode.
Wish I had the social networks to do that now. Won’t be an issue long term, most people just spend time with their families later on anyway.
Ditto. I am a likeable person I can tell. I get along with people at work and outside of work too. I have been told that I am easy to talk to by many. Can make friends in a heartbeat. Have a hard time keeping them though😓 Just that I don’t know how to keep in touch with those people. I am terrible at texting or plain lazy. Get that a lot (even from close friends and relatives). More like out of sight out of mind situation I believe. I consider this the main reason why I am single lol.
I’m in a similar situation .. I’m moving to a new city soon and I’ll try to change, make new friends and go out. I’ve been keeping a distance from ppl for a long time, it helped on achieving and focusing on my career but now I want to make friends in the new place. It gets harder as we grow as someone mentioned but friends are definitely something adds a value to life.
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