Boss retaliation

New wrYO10
Jun 29 26 Comments

My boss is retaliating against me for standing up for myself after she called me a name. Now she doesn’t talk to me, doesn’t give me work, she took me out of team meetings because I am a “bad apple” and she refused to give me my annual performance review.

comments

Want to comment? LOG IN or SIGN UP
TOP 26 Comments
  • Twitch giu37&(2
    Gather all the documentation that you have or write down what you recollect and dates. Approach HR to voice concern.

    But likely this will not end well. Start planning for worst case scenario.
    Jun 29 4
    • New lhkO76
      So, I have done that and HR is going to start an investigation. From what I’ve heard there are a lot of people complaining about her in the company.
      Jun 29
    • Twitch giu37&(2
      Very good. If you’re not a 1-off and there’s a pattern to her behavior with others, then situation might be better. I would still hit Leetcode just to be ready. Always know your exit path, even if you aren’t going to take it.
      Jun 29
    • New lhkO76
      What is Leetcode?
      Jun 29
    • Glassdoor bamm
      Leetcode.com
      ^ That's how you get your next job
      Jun 29
  • Spotify thanus
    Ah... another highly professional female unable to find the difference between her job and her feelings.
    Jun 29 3
    • New lhkO76
      I know! Her line between professionalism and “personal” is very blurred.
      Jun 29
    • Oracle Hajni
      It's not a gender issue, it's an emotional intelligence issue. Men don't fare any better. I had a very similar experience with a male boss.
      Jul 8
    • New Viil84
      Please. I’m currently dealing with a male manager who I’m convinced menstruates just as much as I do
      Jul 9
  • Barclays PLC FAANGHNTER
    It all happened because of a YouTube video she watched the night before. Just tell her she is brave.
    Jun 29 0
  • Expedia Anony🐭
    Your boss is petty. Get the fuck outta there
    Jun 29 0
  • Oracle Hajni
    Yuck. From what I've seen, bad blood is usually better left to dry, unless you can muster you internal peace enough to go have a "How can we get back to mutual winning" conversation with her. Is this a situation where you can surprise her with showing some initiative on a side project? I know it's not always possible, just trying to think outside the box as to what could melt the ice...
    Jun 29 2
    • New lhkO76
      I did! I asked to talk to her about our “issues” and she agreed. Instead of allowing me to ask her how to fix the situation she sat there and lied to my face saying that I was just receiving the treatment that I deserved because I have an attitude problem and because my coworkers have been complaining about me being rude to them and difficult.

      Supposedly this complaint happened weeks ago but her way of handling it was not to talk to me to “fix it” instead she decided best to stop giving me work and to take me out of team meetings.

      BTW, I have 3 coworkers and I am very close with 2 of them. I know what she is telling me is a lie. I am always cheery and available when they have questions. The 3rd coworker is a little difficult herself but I always try to be friendly with her because I know she is close to the boss.
      Jun 29
    • Cloudera FGON81
      Sounds very likely to me that that third coworker is the source of your problem...
      Jun 30
  • BBDO sxYo02
    1. Define what "you stood up for yourself" means in detail.

    2. What did she call you?

    These are important details. Also, I would look for a new job at this point.
    Jul 1 0
  • Chase onlypjay
    Better to move on to another team or company, no need to stress about it. It usually happes with young managers
    Jun 29 0
  • Chase onlypjay
    Happened with me, I started retailiating complain with HR, not much happened after all the work I did. So better try to change the team,
    Jun 29 2
    • New lhkO76
      Yeah, I’ve been sending out resumes. We’ll see what happens. 🤕
      Jun 29
    • Chase onlypjay
      In the meanwhile try to avoid confrontation, and just try to cope up with the work nicely, don't take stress about it
      Jun 29
  • HERE aehauhe7
    She cannot deny you work. Collect documents, take good bote of your conversations. Talk to HR. May not end well though.
    Jul 1 0
  • Slalom Consulting adc
    Had something similar happen with my boss (who was the CEO) so tougher spot, but I documented everything and talked to HR. They were scared to do anything so I shared docs and story with my peer leadership level employees before my exit and helped other exit in my wake aka dismantled key leadership roles based on those actions, it was some sweet revenge. It's one of my only burned bridges but can be an option if you have an exit strat.
    Jun 29 0
  • This comment was deleted by original commenter.

    • New lhkO76
      I don’t see how this is relevant. My boss and I are both women. She should be an ambassador for other women to grown in their careers as she has.
      Jun 29
  • Oracle not_larry
    Which country is this happening in?
    Jun 29 1
  • Reltio blahbrrr
    It may be worth it to look at your own behavior too. Did you talk to her about what steps you can take from your side, what would she like to see changed? Your story is one sided and there might be things that you are doing that don’t go well with her
    Oct 16 0
  • Oracle SfsM37
    Tell me about a time you had to deal with a problem employee

    We had an employee who pushed back when I called him a name in a meeting. As a result I started excluding him, tackling the issue head-on with passive aggressive behavior. As a result HR opened an investigation, and I felt more courageous and empowered when clicking "like" on motivational pictures on facebook.
    Jul 2 0

Salary
Comparison

    Real time salary information from verified employees