My boss is retaliating against me for standing up for myself after she called me a name. Now she doesn’t talk to me, doesn’t give me work, she took me out of team meetings because I am a “bad apple” and she refused to give me my annual performance review.
Yuck. From what I've seen, bad blood is usually better left to dry, unless you can muster you internal peace enough to go have a "How can we get back to mutual winning" conversation with her. Is this a situation where you can surprise her with showing some initiative on a side project? I know it's not always possible, just trying to think outside the box as to what could melt the ice...
I did! I asked to talk to her about our “issues” and she agreed. Instead of allowing me to ask her how to fix the situation she sat there and lied to my face saying that I was just receiving the treatment that I deserved because I have an attitude problem and because my coworkers have been complaining about me being rude to them and difficult. Supposedly this complaint happened weeks ago but her way of handling it was not to talk to me to “fix it” instead she decided best to stop giving me work and to take me out of team meetings. BTW, I have 3 coworkers and I am very close with 2 of them. I know what she is telling me is a lie. I am always cheery and available when they have questions. The 3rd coworker is a little difficult herself but I always try to be friendly with her because I know she is close to the boss.
Ah... another highly professional female unable to find the difference between her job and her feelings.
I know! Her line between professionalism and “personal” is very blurred.
It's not a gender issue, it's an emotional intelligence issue. Men don't fare any better. I had a very similar experience with a male boss.
Happened with me, I started retailiating complain with HR, not much happened after all the work I did. So better try to change the team,
Yeah, I’ve been sending out resumes. We’ll see what happens. 🤕
In the meanwhile try to avoid confrontation, and just try to cope up with the work nicely, don't take stress about it
Had something similar happen with my boss (who was the CEO) so tougher spot, but I documented everything and talked to HR. They were scared to do anything so I shared docs and story with my peer leadership level employees before my exit and helped other exit in my wake aka dismantled key leadership roles based on those actions, it was some sweet revenge. It's one of my only burned bridges but can be an option if you have an exit strat.
I don’t see how this is relevant. My boss and I are both women. She should be an ambassador for other women to grown in their careers as she has.
It all happened because of a YouTube video she watched the night before. Just tell her she is brave.
Your boss is petty. Get the fuck outta there
Better to move on to another team or company, no need to stress about it. It usually happes with young managers
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Gather all the documentation that you have or write down what you recollect and dates. Approach HR to voice concern. But likely this will not end well. Start planning for worst case scenario.
So, I have done that and HR is going to start an investigation. From what I’ve heard there are a lot of people complaining about her in the company.
Very good. If you’re not a 1-off and there’s a pattern to her behavior with others, then situation might be better. I would still hit Leetcode just to be ready. Always know your exit path, even if you aren’t going to take it.