Tech IndustrySep 27, 2019
Newiuz

Ever have a panic attack during an onsite? I just did

TLDR: After showing up 45 mins late, had a panic attack and walked out during a stupid simple code interview. Title says it all. I'm looking to change companies because I'm totally miserable at my current gig. Have been doing phone screens and they've been going TERRIFIC. So much so that during the screen for this first interview they liked me so much it was insisted I skip to the final stage of the process for an onsite. Similarly positive responses during my other screens as well. So today was that first onsite and it was a complete disaster. I had to deal with multiple unexpected high pressure situations at my current job in the morning, then ended up getting stuck in traffic due to a bunch of busted toll booths (even though I left over an hour earlier than I had to just in case) and finally after deciding it was time to call them to let em know I was running behind I realized I left my phone at home. I show up 45 mins late, have to pay $60 to park almost 8 blocks away cuz the checkin window for the $10 parking pass I purchased in preparation expired and it's now pouring rain outside. To make matters worse, it's a shared workspace in a large busy location and no one at the front desk knows where the company I'm supposed to go to is actually located. So further delays ensue. I finally get where I'm supposed to be completely soaking wet, frazzled and clearly stressed out. I rattle off an explanation about broken toll booths and no phone, while getting this look like I was on drugs or something (I swear I totally wasn't). I apologize extensively and tell them I totally understand if they just wanna reschedule or even cancel the interview entirely. But, they wanted to make the best of the situation so we proceeded to do the coding interview. We go in this tiny room, I then start having issues connecting to the wifi and my IDE wont load properly on my laptop. After a couple minutes I get it sorted out, I'm hooked up to this giant screen and am presented with a extremely simple coding problem. Honestly I dont know what happened at that point, but I just froze. Couldnt think straight, started getting tunnel vision, heart racing and hands shaking, could barely breathe. It seriously like I was about to have a heart attack. I sat there for a couple mins hoping I could get control of things again, but I was too far gone. I just drew a blank. It was like I've never touched a line of code before in my life. I felt like an absolute idiot. Not to mention the feeling of impending cardiac arrest I was experiencing. I stood up, apologized for wasting the interviewer's time and said "I just cant do this right now. I dont know what's wrong with me but apparently I cant map over a simple object array at the moment". The interviewer was empathetic and even said let them know if I'd like to reschedule for some other time. I extended my thanks apologized again and I walked out in absolute shame. When I got back to my vehicle and finished paying my gold bar for parking, I literally just broke down. I'm not an emotional person at all. Total opposite actually. I've had bad interviews before and am constantly in high stress situations. I never let that kinda stuff get to me. As a matter of fact my ability to handle and manage high stress scenarios is something I'm often commended on. Its where I really shine. But I've also never had a panic attack before, apparently there's a first time for everything. So I dont know what the hell is wrong with me after all is said and done. Worse part about it is when I eventually got home I turned on the laptop and the notes for the problem were still open in my IDE. I took a look at em and managed to sort out the problem in like 9 minutes. That's my story. A little bit of schadenfreud for the peeps that are into that kinda stuff. Would be cool if someone could one up me though... Maybe peed themselves during an interview or even better, interviewed with someone who recognized you from blind??? TC: 100k YOE: 8

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Google perfy Sep 27, 2019

Bro u typed this all on your phone 💀

New
iuz OP Sep 27, 2019

At least my thumbs may have a future...

Google batmobile Sep 27, 2019

Sounds like a real panic attack, in the medical sense. Just because you have been fine so far doesn't mean you are immune to stress. Maybe stress was building up internally? Rest over the weekend and go for the interview again. Good luck.

Google batmobile Sep 27, 2019

Also, you should be careful and pay attention to yourself to make sure this doesn't develop into a disorder.

New
iuz OP Sep 27, 2019

Thanks. That's what I'm really concerned about . The truth is, I really wasnt even super interested in the position. Which is what makes this worse. Breaking down like that over something that I normally wouldn't care about seems like an indication that something underlying is going on in my head. I guess in hindsight, its probably why I'm even posting here. Cheaper than a therapist.

Intel JmsIngram Sep 27, 2019

It's normal. I would have felt same. I would say move on. It was a bad day and you have 100s of other company to interview. Don't feel sad.

Magic Leap ☄️💥🔥 Sep 27, 2019

Well, it sounds terrible but... also memorable. Remember next time if a interviewer asks about a failure you had, bring this story up!

New
iuz OP Sep 27, 2019

I'll pee on the interviewers shoe during my next one... Now that's a story 🤔

Microsoft Tattle Sep 27, 2019

It's ok man. Shit happens. Have a chill weekend and then start interviewing again. What are the chances of this happening again.

Wayfair myting Sep 27, 2019

Same thing happened at my google interview! It was the very last one and I did great on all the ones prior to it. Get to the last one and I choke so hard... when I got home I solved it in 2min. Seriously 2min of code. I was ashamed of myself at the time and it cost me an offer. Don’t sweat it. Everything happens for a reason. Life is messed up and you should always try to look back and laugh about it. Think about it from the perspective of your death bed. Imagine you lying there, thinking about the life you lived... do you really think you messing up on this opportunity would depress you? No! You’ll probably laugh about it and it’ll put a smile on your face. Who knows what it’ll lead to! Life is mysterious and if you try to control everything that happens around you, you’re gonna be miserable. Go with the flow!

Apple lPnq2Ah Sep 27, 2019

Op just remember soon you’ll be dead and none of this will matter

Apple KGHP41 Sep 27, 2019

Try to relax. Happens to all of us once in a while.

HackerRank Elcamino37 Sep 27, 2019

Dude, I fully sympathize with you. I think it was just a bad day and that happens to each one of us. Of course interview process is nerve wracking and since this was your first on-site after a long time and with other issues, situation escalated. I’m sure you must have learnt from your experience - keep away from distractions ( office work ;)) on the day of the interview, etc. i’m sure you would do good in future, it just happened that so many unknowns happened with u. Good Luck!

New
iuz OP Sep 27, 2019

Yeah, that's where I messed up. The other distractions got the best of me. No more interviews on workdays. Need to get in the right headspace first.

Amazon bоb Sep 27, 2019

TC or GTFO

New
iuz OP Sep 27, 2019

It's in the profile, bruh... dont they teach y'all to click stuff at amzn?

New
ellie.js Sep 27, 2019

geez.. pretty feisty for someone who just caked their pants mid interview