Add everything up financial that you are getting from your employer in return for working there. Base, bonus, espp margin, 401 (k) contributions, one time cash bonuses, realized/current mkt value of stock grants etc.
Remember two things: money is compensation no matter how it is structured; count stock based on current mkt value (for something you can sell in open mkt immediately) or use some estimate if it's not liquid or use the cost of using a fancy financial instrument (put; collar; short etc) to protect stock that you are counting in TC but not immediately available to sell.
A bit complex, eh? So use estimates to simplify what you can't easily assign a dollar value to and understand that that's what most folks are doing -- so treat TCs, particularly with big stock components, in buckets to account for the fuzziness
Social media is not training you it just attracts already competitive people. There are plenty of people who are on social media who are not social climbers and there were plenty of people who were social climbers before the advent of social media. Stop projecting your shit.