Fell in love with my best friend

Apple
heartbrek

Apple

PRE
Sutter Health
BIO
Looking to change job to data scientist
heartbrekmore
Mar 7 41 Comments

I am in love with my best friend and I have expressed my feelings. She said she needed more time. But she has started dating a different guy few days ago. I am totally shattered and in a mess. I told her not to contact me again and I blocked her. I am missing me best friend a lot but I cannot imagine her with a different guy. Please help me out with this. She means a lot to. I don't know if can still be friends with her

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TOP 41 Comments
  • Apple zVzOzLzNz
    Why are u sad and miserable while your friend is busy fucking another guy. Move on, go for another girl dude
    Mar 70
  • Microsoft / Engsudо
    So to sum up: you expressed your feelings, and instead of being honest with you, she just kept you waiting until she dates someone else?
    Doesn't sound like a friend move to me.
    Give yourself some time to let emotions calm down, and look at this after a few weeks.
    Mar 73
    • Microsoft AzureNoob
      what would you have done? imagine how awkward and uncomfortable it would be to have your friend that you're not attracted to reveal their feelings for you
      Mar 7
    • Sirius XM TySkwieos8
      It is definitely awkward and uncomfortable but if you’re friends with someone you don’t just tell them “hold on a minute” and then go date someone else, you tell them you’re only interested in them as a friend even though it might be hard to break that news to them because the rejection is guaranteed to hurt them.
      Mar 7
    • Microsoft / Engsudо
      @AzureNoob, of course it would be.
      But hey, between two evils, I find lying to a friend and basically ghosting him to be worse than a general awkwardness.
      Mar 7
  • Lending Club ibWI74
    Just move on buddy
    Mar 70
  • Facebook
    dnbdub

    Facebook

    PRE
    LinkedIn
    BIO
    People, projects, pay, then place. In that order.
    dnbdubmore
    I went through this in high school. I didn’t give up. I wanted to be with her and she was confused because she thought of me as her BFF. I stayed away for a little while not because I was being a b*tch but more because I wanted to sharpen up. That time away made her miss me so when she calls, I started talking to her like a man (not a dude friend). Eventually, I started taking her out on dates and not just to hang out. Finally, one day, she jumped me and we had sex everyday (or as much as we could) for two years until we both left for college. We met other people and went on with our lives but I still remember the sex and the love I felt like it was yesterday. I’m glad I stayed true to my feelings and was brave enough to put myself out there to win her but wasn’t a fool either. Breaking out of the friend zone is possible so long as you start behaving like a man she wants to have sex with, not a “brother” buddy.
    Mar 71
    • This is bad advice. 99% of the time it doesn’t pan out like this. OP: you are the 99%.
      Mar 7
  • Google wqIe83
    Been there, done that. Not worth thinking about it more. Just move on.
    Mar 70
  • LinkedIn tendies
    lol at sitting at home busting nuts on yourself while she's getting pounded by multiple cocks in multiple holes and enjoying every second of it. You don't exist in her mind when Chad is giving her his 10 inches. Time to move on. She gone, she gone.
    Mar 72
  • Microsoft AzureNoob
    lol move on. this is the risk with trying to take yourself out of the friend zone, you get rejected and your friendship will never be the same. she couldn't bring her self to tell you that she was never into you like that.
    Mar 70
  • New / MgmtVSwf01
    She was never your friend just a girl you never had the courage to ask out for a long time. You need to grow up, if she was really your friend you would be happy for her if she's happy. Instead you have thrown a temper tantrum. Get over it, go find someone else. Stop being friends with women you want to fuck else you will keep finding yourself in this same situation.
    Mar 70
  • Hotwire rpdI04
    Increase your sex appeal. Many girls don't mind cheating if you're attractive enough. Satisfy yourself and move on.
    Mar 71
    • LinkedIn tendies
      Damn truth right here. Just more black pill LOL. Easier to have sex with girls that are in relationships than those that are single. Over for non chads.
      Mar 7
  • Cognizant APIPM
    You Indian? Is she American?
    Mar 72
    • comScore / Other👩‍💼👠🎓
      No wonder you work at Cognizant.
      Mar 7
    • Cognizant APIPM
      No wonder you are an idiot who is replying on OPs behalf.
      Mar 7
  • Addepar 83485895
    Love yourself first and foremost. It sounds cheesy but if you really value yourself and your emotions, you won’t let someone else affect you like that. The “not being able to see her with another guy” is a problem you need to work on. She’s living her best life, and so should you. The correct mindset to have is “it’s unfortunate she wasn’t the one, but at least now I won’t waste my time with someone who’s not right for me” as opposed to “she was the one for me, why won’t she love me back”. Think of this as a blessing in disguise. Take some time to work on yourself and build up your self esteem. Find hobbies. Socialize. Also allow yourself to feel the magnitude of emotions that come with this experience. You CAN choose who you love, but you have to choose to love yourself first.
    Mar 70
  • PayPal da anomaly
    You’re screwed. She was the one for you and you ruined it by blocking her. You will die alone.

    Also, TC?
    Mar 70
  • Capital One / ProductMrProduct
    Telling her not to call you and blocking her was the wrong move. Most women need time to digest new information and want to do some soul searching to see how they feel. Also, keep in mind that she doesn't want to ruin the delicate balance that you currently have together as besties. So she needs to decide if taking the leap is worth it. If you're a good friend, you should stick around. Don't disappear. Date other people. Stay in touch with her. You never know what the future holds. Eventually, she may break up with whomever she's dating and then you'll have your chance.
    Mar 70
  • Oracle
    bcnkid

    Oracle

    PRE
    Stealth Worker
    BIO
    Control over your own life is an illusion.
    bcnkidmore
    Cringe
    Mar 70
  • Amazon babymakes5
    I’ve been there and there is a better answer. If you love her and are not just “in love” with her (totally different things) then you want what’s best for her regardless of what it feels like, does to you, or anything. If you truly unconditionally love her, I’d go this route. My litmus test: if you would want her in your life in *any* capacity, whether an acquaintance or a friend or close friend, try to salvage it.

    If she really is your best friend I would find a way to live with it if you can’t have a romantic relationship.

    If the answer is no, then she wasn’t really a best friend.
    Mar 76
    • No way he would definitely interfere with her romantic life unless he changes his mindset drastically
      Mar 7
    • Amazon babymakes5
      I don’t think he would sabotage it. I’ve been there where someone tried to sabotage a relationship and I just gave my SO a head up and that was it. The person in question gave up.
      Mar 7
    • Have you ever dated someone where it was clear that their “friends” were just biding their time? It’s not fun to be on the other side of
      Mar 7
    • Amazon babymakes5
      No I haven’t. There are many friends who I love platonically. A few had been someone I had a crush on but had decided to spend the time on staying her friend. She ghosted anyway but it was a special 2 year friendship.
      Mar 7
    • Ok I’m not saying that it’s not possible just that OP is not in that mindset
      Mar 7
    • Amazon babymakes5
      I’m saying he needs to get into that mindset. I should have been clearer earlier.
      Mar 8
  • Microsoft
    corey.s

    Microsoft

    PRE
    Google
    corey.smore
    I trained a model to detect ethnicity of blind posters. My model says OP is Indian.
    Mar 73
    • Hotwire rpdI04
      Hm... American guys aren't so caring!
      Mar 7
    • Microsoft
      corey.s

      Microsoft

      PRE
      Google
      corey.smore
      Or Indian guys are overly emotional!
      PS: I'm Desi.
      PPS: American != White
      Mar 7
    • Hotwire rpdI04
      Nah, they are the normal, by virtue of their population.
      Mar 7
  • New / Engstarl0rd
    Staahp.
    Mar 70
  • Google Eebscakev
    Here to commiserate;
    fell for my best friend too, and she shared the attraction-> our physical connection topping our emotional connection.
    But within few weeks had moved on to someone else...
    Now she wants us to be best friends and is upset I am having none of it.
    -heartbroken
    Mar 121
    • Google Ssm2219as
      Yikes! That’s a hot mess. Good riddance
      Mar 12
  • Google bhh
    Well next time dont love ur best friend then
    Mar 70
  • Intel fm4
    OP this is stable matching algorithm 🙂 you are just a part of it Neo. Take a chill pill and move on. Your time will come when you will be matched
    Mar 70
  • Hubspot / Enghebtidhevh
    Move on?
    Mar 70
  • Rackspace @!hjk$
    Not worth it. Don’t think about it and start seeing other people, rejection pain is temporary
    Mar 70

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