During a casual conversation which turned deep, a friend (40 years old, good salary, good savings, married 10+ years, 2 kids, gets along well with spouse) mentioned "I feel life is too long, and it feels pointless sometimes especially after 40-45 years of age. I feel I have lived my life pretty much. I am not going to kill myself, of course, but things hold not much purpose." I didn't know what to say. I want to reach out to people of similar age, do you share similar feelings? Is this what people refer to as mid life crisis, how do you resolve this?
35-40 and I agree with your friend
Where does this emptiness stem from? What do you do about it?
Stuck in a location I don't like. (I've interviewed, can't land offers, not enough time to LC) Unable to travel. Dull work. Repetitive daily, weekly, monthly routines. Not much just keep grinding, binge Hulu.
Sounds like standard midlife crisis. If it gets severe would recommend talking to a professional (or buying a red sports car)
My dad did the sports car thing, he was so happy.
Microsoft, are you being sarcastic or was that serious?
What! Hell no - there is so much to do/see/discover - even if you loved to a thousand, you'll only have explored a small percentage of what's possible
I am not of that age group but I wanted to chime in anyway. If they are lucky enough to achieve to their hearts content, I think others can benefit a little from their time. Local food banks, homeless and animal shelters could use a lot more help. If they are able, world could use good teachers too. I don’t mean to preach. Many times it can just not occur to people how their time can be shared with others and it is a gift.
Only when you're stuck in a dull routine.
I am 40 and still feel like new to it. There is so much to see and explore 😜
Wife + 2 kids to support? I can understand his malcontent
I am not that age group. I can understand the why one can feel that way. Life becomes routine. Milestones(set largely by society) such as good career, marriage, and kids are met. One cant afford to disturb this balance by taking too many risks. Status quo continues. What to aspire for next? Nothing.
How do you break this? I wanted to help my friend but didn't know what to say. I just felt sympathetic
Your friend's problem is they get along with their spouse. Ask their spouse to start nagging, whining and complaining. Life will be full of thrills and excitement and there will never be a dull moment. Just kidding. I do not know how to break the cycle.
So there are lots of thoughts on this... 1. Anomie - aka purposelessness. 2. Intellectual Boredom - AKA pushing up a rock uphill 3. Biochemistry: depression, anxiety, 4. Burnout: proposed solution: sabbatical from the life treadmill All of these have solutions. Most start with intellectual honesty.
That’s fucked up
😱