I still have lingering thoughts of it. To be clear I don't just sit on my ass watching Netflix, eat junk food in my under wear, and whine about not having a girlfriend. I lift weights and do yoga regularly, I go out to events, and I am trying out new hobbies, like salsa dancing, and I'm trying to learn how to flirt properly without being a creep. I know I shouldn't base my happiness and self worth on having a girlfriend, and I do my best to mentally make myself stop thinking this way. Despite all my efforts, I still have lingering thoughts of suicide. I know I won't act on it, but when I was younger it was way worse, especially in college. I went to a big party school and it seemed like every guy around me was good at dating. I'm wondering if any of my fellow male SWE's feel this way, as I have a suspicion this is fairly widespread. Either that or I just worry too much (probably the case). Thoughts?
Wait you work for Tinder? Are you trolling?
Yes I work for Tinder, and yes I am not good with women. I am honestly not trolling. I have some confidence issues that I am still trying to get over
Merely working for a dating app company doesn't ensure my success at dating
You should feel great about it because you're not wasting your time and going through dramas attracting girls. You should also be proud of it because you didn't or don't ever try to be someone else who will flirt, talk a lot, spend a lot and attract girls. Trust me it's not worth it. Girls who just fall for flirting are not worth it. If you want have sex just go on dating sites for one night stands. If you have enough reason to die i have even more, I have been getting killed by OCD. Trust me, it changed me in a way no one can ever imagine. Yet i have a wife who loves me. You will find someone who truly loves you for what you are. You just wait for it and enjoy life.
Don't I have to know how to flirt to express my interest though? It all seems very complicated. I try online dating sites but I am not white so it kind of sucks for me (I am Indian). I'm glad you found someone, that's great ☺️
Yes flirting is very normal to signal attraction
You gonna need some cool bros around you. Sometimes being alone isn't just about not having a girl in life. If you already have enough friends and family, then just keep trying, and do what you love to. Keep yourself busy.
I guess that's the thing, since I moved to LA I haven't made any friends.. I should somehow. I guess it takes time
Sorry to hear about your loneliness. That sucks. I will say though being married is the loneliest I've been and I do enjoy being married. It doesn't fix problems but we like to think it does. I agree, start with friendships in general. Hobby groups, meet ups, real connections with real people. No one person can meet all our needs so those friendships will matter with or without a girlfriend.
Learn how to attract women. I found my GF by going up to her and saying "Hey, your cute...".
That actually worked? Hahaha I always thought they prefer a compliment that's not about their looks
It works 2/10. Sometimes you get ignored. Sometimes you get a ty/smile. And every now and then you'll get a number.
I am very successful at dating women , and am dating so many women's right now that I am planning to commit suicide soon .. Even if you successfully date one wrong woman , you are all set for suicide ! Relax dude !!
Man you work at tinder. Ball is in your court.
Nothing is worth killing yourself for. Please see a doctor soon. You are worth being alive, even without a girlfriend in the picture.
Get hookers and take out the energy inside you, make guy friends next, just simply have fun, do activities and hobbies, if you do all these without any expectations, you will be fine
I already see hookers regularly. It is fun, but it doesn't provide me with a romantic relationship or intimacy. That's also one of my concerns, that girls won't want to date a guy that used to see hookers.
Yup. It's likely distracting you from something real too.
Please don't. Few years from now, you will look at this phase and wonder why you got stressed so much.
I won't, but I don't know what the future will be like, I don't have a crystal ball. I'm mainly wondering if other tech guys feel this way, I have a suspicion that they do..
As your income increases, things will get better.