How are H1B and green card holder’s significant others working?

IBM Biol
Jul 14, 2018 29 Comments

I’ve kept telling my fiance abroad to wait till I get settle down with visa stuffs. Now I’ve almost got green card (I’ve initiated the process before I met him) and now it will take him at least a few years to get the green card for ‘legally working’ in the US if we get married.
Many people said the fastest way to bring your significant others to the US “and” make him/her to legally work is to go to the school, be on F1 visa first, get OPT, and get H1B to avoid the waste of time doing nothing at home in queuing for green card. But there are lots of couple in the world who both needs to continue the career due to monetary reason. For those who, going to the school sounds too luxurious.
How are other couples from outside of the US handling this problem? Are many people actually breaking up due to visa and long distance relationships? Or sacrificing one’s career to be together and stay home for a few years till getting a legal immigrant status? I was once L1B and now regret that I should have just maintained that visa so that my significant other could work as soon as we get married. Now we are in our 30s and need to wait a few years or I give up everything here and go back to my fiance’s country.

comments

Want to comment? LOG IN or SIGN UP
TOP 29 Comments
  • Has she ever been to us? I would recommend her to go through student route and then cpt/opt.. This will be stepping stone for her to assimilate in the culture..

    The college can be a community college not a fancy private college since your intent is to ensure she doesn’t get bored at home plus she is also engaged..

    It’s a game of patience..

    My sisters came to us in 2001/2002 and they also sat home for 3-4 years before they got their green cards.. they followed a similar approach and with an American degree it wa much easier to be selected for jobs..
    Jul 14, 2018 4
    • Amazon / Eng
      sarcasticg

      Amazon Eng

      PRE
      Sabre Corporation
      sarcasticgmore
      She? The "she" in the confession almost has the green card. It's a "he" who wants to come to US.
      Jul 14, 2018
    • Just reverse the gender man and get over it..
      Jul 14, 2018
    • Amazon / Eng
      sarcasticg

      Amazon Eng

      PRE
      Sabre Corporation
      sarcasticgmore
      Sure Mr. Mysogynist.

      Would that work to get pregnant too?
      Jul 14, 2018
    • IBM Biol
      OP
      He has been staying in the US quiet a while during the school and for many business trips. The thing is he doesn’t want to stay home for 3-4 years doing nothing, neither I want it. If he has to do so only to be with me, I will feel so guilty in ruining his career and the relationship will go wrong. Also we both have school loans and mortgages to pay for, it is not easy to be a single income family. He is capable, working in tech and grew up in American culture. I don’t doubt he can get a job once visa is allowed. We’ve tried to find all possible ways (expat to US from his current company, remote position, do his own start up, etc) and actually attempted all aggressively, but did not work. Now we feel so devastated and lost ;( If it is a game of patience, time does not seem to be our side as a long distance couple......
      Jul 14, 2018
  • Amazon / Eng
    sarcasticg

    Amazon Eng

    PRE
    Sabre Corporation
    sarcasticgmore
    The best way is H1B. Alternatively, bring him after the wedding as your dependent on H4, file for H4 EAD
    Jul 14, 2018 5
    • Snapchat Evan
      H4 EAD is on the chopping block. Uncle sessions doesn’t like it.
      Jul 14, 2018
    • Amazon / Eng
      sarcasticg

      Amazon Eng

      PRE
      Sabre Corporation
      sarcasticgmore
      You have a better solution?
      Jul 14, 2018
    • Snapchat Evan
      No. Something to be aware of though. Need to have a plan B if it gets cut.
      Jul 14, 2018
    • IBM Biol
      OP
      Thanks for the advice. We’re closely following H4 EAD stories and looks like it’s about to shut down. At least it is the most feasible option as of now. We better have plan B.
      Jul 14, 2018
    • Microsoft / Eng RandMcNall
      Please don't look at the news about EAD. Talk to an immigration lawyer, it's not going anywhere.
      Don't make decisions based on some stupid article and random opinions
      Jul 15, 2018
  • Microsoft mGYn80
    Not sure if this is still actual, but not very long ago, if you would get married before you get the green card, he would be able to get a dependent green card in the same time you are getting one. He can work with the dependent green card, but he would have a condition on the green card that you would need to stay married a couple of years, or else, in case you get a divorce before enought time has passed, he will lose the green card. If you get married before you get the green card and apply for him as well, you will probably get more scrutiny (e.g. an interview) but as long you can prove this is a real relationship and you have been together for a while, you should be fine. I don't remember exactly the terms, but I think that the main rule was that you can apply for a green card for him as well, as long as you got married before yours was approved and that person is already in the US on another visa at that time, so he can apply for AOS. If you get married after you get the green card it will probably take years for them to get a visa to join you. Look more into it as I don't remember it exactly and maybe talk with an immigration lawyer.
    Jul 14, 2018 1
    • Amazon lDDH24
      This
      Jul 15, 2018
  • Microsoft / Eng RandMcNall
    H4 EAD, then green card. Piece of cake
    Jul 14, 2018 7
    • Amazon 123raj
      Denial mode?
      Jul 15, 2018
    • Microsoft / Eng RandMcNall
      No, enough knowledge of how hard it is to change immigration laws like that
      Jul 15, 2018
    • Console Connect / Mgmt gqDS15
      Amazon, Sounds like you have a lot of reading to do. You might be stuck in your H1B negativity bubble and don’t really understand any of the other processes post H1B.

      H4 EAD might be disappearing, but not the H4 nor the AoS EAD. The guy just needs have legal presence in the US that’s dual intent compatible to do an AoS. You don’t need a H4 EAD for legal presence.
      Jul 15, 2018
    • Microsoft / Eng RandMcNall
      It's the same as the ongoing story of the last 5? Maybe more? Years about the h1b changes. Where did that go??
      Making decisions based on that would be stupid and same goes for h4 ead
      Jul 15, 2018
    • Amazon 123raj
      @console i never said h4 visa is going away. Only talked about h4 work visa. Read properly before coming to conclusions
      Jul 15, 2018
  • Amazon ty5yy
    Talk to the lawyers and see if you can still add him to your GC application if you were to get married
    Jul 15, 2018 0
  • Console Connect / Mgmt gqDS15
    What’s your and his country of origin? What stage of green card process are you at? Which category of immigrate visa are you adjusting your status to?
    Jul 14, 2018 3
    • IBM Biol
      OP
      Just left the comment and instantly deleted it as it contained too much personal info. But really appreciate your intension to help out here!
      Jul 14, 2018
    • Console Connect / Mgmt gqDS15
      If your I-485 isn’t approved yet, you may still have time to add him to your application depending on the above questions.

      You would need to get married immediately, bring him over under a proper spouse visa (H4, L2, etc) and apply for adjustment of status all prior to your I-485 approval.

      While it’s all pending, you could also apply for an AoS-based employment authorization document, allowing him to start working in a matter of a couple months.

      It would save you about 3-4 years to skip the consular route and take advantage of the AoS route.

      At the end of the day, you really have to make a decision in your relationship: shit or get off the pot. If you’re not ready for it, 3-4 years away won’t help.

      Happy to chat over private message.
      Jul 14, 2018
    • Amazon / Product Ulub72
      +1. Really depends at which stage you are right now
      Jul 15, 2018
  • Intuit Uhagd
    Your partner can quickly repay education loans by doing internships. You should find out if he is willing to come here as a student and go through the process. 1.5 years would end quickly. Couples do not break up over this. Good luck!
    Jul 14, 2018 2
    • IBM Biol
      OP
      This is where my partner and I have a different view. He feels extremely uncomfortable in making me as a sole breadwinner for 2 years while he is in school. I keep telling him it’s going to be okay and I’m going to be okay + all the things you commented above but my partner is worrying if any uncertain situation happens to me (unfair treatment at work, lay off, sick, pregnancy, etc) and he can’t help as a student. Long story short, we still need to talk more if this is the best option given to us. Thanks for your kind words!
      Jul 14, 2018
    • Intuit Uhagd
      You would not be the sole breadwinner since within a year he can get into an internship. Internship salaries are higher than full time salaries and come with great perks in some Bay area companies. You both need careful planning and timing this plus save every penny from your salary.

      There is always a risk in everything - everyone who comes here for studies have the same risk. You can plan to not get pregnant until he finishes studies. He can also try to find scholarships to pay tuition. Even if all of those risks happen you both can always get another job.
      Jul 15, 2018