How do I stop obsessing over a girl?

Amazon hopelessin
Apr 15 38 Comments

I met a girl from Harvard sitting next to me on a plane once and for the life of me I can’t get her out of my head after I matched with her on Tinder a few days later. She ghosted me mid conversation (pretty sure she deleted the app) but I keep thinking about her.

Here’s why I shouldn’t rationally do that:

- we have nothing in common (she’s 99% a Republican that watched Glee for Christ sakes)

- haven’t/can’t even creepily stalk her on social media (she doesn’t even use hers??)

- she’s attractive but not much more than me

But for some fucking reason I keep thinking about her - I think it’s because she works in a field that I think is really cool (drug discovery). What the fuck do I do to reason my way out of this?

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TOP 38 Comments
  • Cisco aleph00
    Get over it. There are 2B women out there.
    Apr 15 1
    • Amazon hopelessin
      OP
      I think that’s an underestimate but nonetheless I would be able to easily if this was a rational decision lol
      Apr 15
  • Microsoft HdnF84
    You sound needy
    Apr 15 3
    • Amazon hopelessin
      OP
      I am
      Apr 15
    • Activision Blizzard / Eng bugehalls
      well at least you have identified it
      Apr 15
    • Amazon hopelessin
      OP
      Yeah but I’m not needy for everyone.
      Apr 15
  • Wayfair / Eng nkrT78
    Realize that you aren’t entitled to anyone’s time and get over yourself. The fact that she clearly isn’t interested and you still tried to cyber stalk her makes me think she dodged a bullet.
    Apr 15 1
    • Amazon hopelessin
      OP
      You’re right and I don’t blame her tbh.
      Apr 15
  • Facebook bookfaceig
    You met her IRL first and then later matched on Tinder?? Why didn’t you just get her info on plane and meet up based on that?
    Apr 15 4
    • Amazon hopelessin
      OP
      I’m a wuss duh. How am I supposed to know if she’s single?
      Apr 15
    • Facebook bookfaceig
      It’s not like that. If it’s a good convo and you’re connecting, you just ask/suggest it. If she’s down to meet then great, if she’s like I have a bf or rejects/later ghosts then you’re done and move on
      Apr 15
    • Amazon hopelessin
      OP
      For the record I actually did ask for her info; I got her LinkedIn.

      Yes, it was lame.
      Apr 15
    • Facebook bookfaceig
      well then it sounds like a real solid _connection_ 😅
      Apr 15
  • GE kTnh03
    Take more plane trips. Leave the poor girl alone. If it seems like she is avoiding you, she definitely is. Move TF on.
    Apr 15 1
    • Amazon hopelessin
      OP
      Hard to say “avoiding” really more than just “disappearing”.
      Apr 15
  • LinkedIn EngAdvice
    Was it "why do you keep bugging me?" ?
    Apr 15 7
    • Amazon hopelessin
      OP
      Surprisingly no she asked if I related more to Liz Lemon or Jack from 30 rock
      Apr 15
    • GE kTnh03
      30 Rock, really funny show. At least she has a sense of humor and good taste in comedy shows.
      Apr 15
    • Amazon hopelessin
      OP
      Ok well outside of that and career choices we don’t have anything really in common
      Apr 15
    • Bank of America Quackers
      What was your answer tho
      Apr 15
    • Amazon hopelessin
      OP
      I said aspirationally Jack but realistically Liz.
      Apr 15
    • Bank of America Quackers
      That explains it all
      Apr 15
    • Amazon hopelessin
      OP
      Yeah I know...
      Apr 15
  • Intel Act2016
    The issue is. You say she is republican and watches glee and that is somehow an issue. I am republican and conservative and watch glee. Who gives a f. So you must have oozed your liberalism pretty bad.
    Apr 15 0
  • Microsoft uyeI81
    Realize that this is your hormones doing this to you, you could steer your focus towards anyone else, it's in your control.
    Distract yourself by doing sports and get out there, meet with friends, get more hobbies, meditate, really dig into minfulness & conciousness and the likes. It seems you do have too much time.

    For myself, I know I have a tendency to fall for someone every 2 years, even if in a relationship. No need to act on it, rationalize it, it's just your body trying to reproduce and your ability to fall for people indicates that you are a healthy human being.
    Apr 15 0
  • Microsoft
    ninjatide

    Microsoft

    BIO
    🙃
    ninjatidemore
    keep it moving. borderline disturbed talk.
    Apr 15 0
  • Facebook
    Nevernude

    Facebook

    BIO
    .
    Nevernudemore
    Rub one out, bro. Serious suggestion.
    Apr 15 4
    • Amazon hopelessin
      OP
      Doesn’t work I take too many SSRIs.
      Apr 15
    • GE kTnh03
      What do you plan to do with this girl if you guys meet up again? Just curious.
      Apr 15
    • Amazon hopelessin
      OP
      No idea. Honestly I just need local friends lmao.
      Apr 15
    • GE kTnh03
      Lol. I've been there myself.
      Apr 15
  • Dropbox systest
    I don’t think she deleted the app. If you see a red exclamation mark next to your message, that means she blocked you.
    Apr 15 2
    • Amazon hopelessin
      OP
      Nope, not blocked. I say “mid conversation” because she asked me a question
      Apr 15
    • Dropbox systest
      I see. Sorry I made the wrong assumption.
      Apr 15
  • BlackRock xis
    I had to Wiki Glee and Chrissakes , and I still don’t understand your rant. Maybe I am a bot.
    Apr 15 0
  • F5 Networks hmm....
    Keep on going! Will do you good.
    Apr 15 0
  • Zoosk zoosker
    Seek therapy and get some sane treatment
    Apr 15 0
  • Microsoft HdnF84
    Then @aleph00 is right...
    Apr 15 0