How to feel proud about your self? I feel proud about nothing!

Apple / EngMappleSuck
May 11 20 Comments

If I am having a conversation with some one, I am always the push over. If they discount my skills, I just accept it. I don’t even defend myself! I just take the beating!

Any idea what’s going on?

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TOP 20 Comments
  • Oracle not_larry
    Get better friends. Why would anyone discount your skills? Tell them to GTFO.
    May 110
  • Why are they discounting your skills? That’s pretty fucked up yo. Fuck em.

    Look in reality everyone’s learning. Whoever criticizes you has problems too. No one’s perfect. Screw people that put you down, they’re just jackasses who are like that with everyone.
    May 110
  • Microsoft / R&Dpr~
    Are you happy? If yes, nothing matters. There is no need to defend yourself always except for the person you care.
    Are you talking about technical skills? Still, no need to defend except in official conversations.
    This state can be very useful if you are confident about yourself. If not, try to make new friends who are accomodating. Bullying is not your problem, it's their.
    May 110
  • Microsoft kdifihv
    Usually the people who try to belittle others have insecurities of their own.
    I don't think you should worry about it unless it's your manager who is doing to talking. And even in that case, you have to be your own judge to decide whether the feedback that person gave you is something you need to work on, or whether you are not presenting your skills right, or you need to help them see it better, or you just need a different manager.

    But irrespective of the person, you should totally work on yourself to not be a push over and have to ability to respect your accomplishments. You don't necessarily need to have an ability to talk back to just bullies (although it is a good to have skill ;) ), but you should at least not accept just feedback to yourself.

    I know it's easier said than done. Coz I struggle at it myself. But keep working towards getting there.

    P.S. And it's totally ok to ignore such fuck heads from your life.
    May 110
  • Uber GhPw30
    It’s okay not to go to parties if they make you sad.
    May 110
  • Oracle / Opsiamfine
    Feel ya
    May 110
  • New / EngSharmaG
    The alpha males have a necessity to chew on push overs like you to feel good about themselves. After you take enough such beatings, you'll stop giving a fuck. If they go low, you'll go lower. You will stand up for yourself because you'll realize that there are a lot of jerks around -- esp. in tech.
    May 111
    • Apple py1
      That would be “alpha males”.
      May 11
  • IBM
    uxbot

    IBM

    PRE
    IBM
    uxbotmore
    In all seriousness, find a therapist. Apple probably offers something to employees. Life is too short to suffer things like this.
    May 110
  • New / Eng
    Mlup06

    NewEng

    PRE
    Urban Airship
    Mlup06more
    a) your work is not who you are. b) it’s a good idea to pay a professional to talk to you about it.
    May 111
    • New / Eng
      Mlup06

      NewEng

      PRE
      Urban Airship
      Mlup06more
      get therapy. you can afford it
      May 11
  • STC / Field Opspsilocybic
    More context of these conversations is needed for proper analysis...

    *bleep blorp*
    May 110
  • Google Mr. GIass
    Lol. Why do some of you people tie your self worth to your employment? Do you not have a life outside of this stuff? Maybe some therapy would indeed help.
    May 110
  • Amazon / EngDeepObsess
    Just get a higher TC to compensate for it lol
    May 110
  • Apple py1
    You are not being fair to yourself. Hope you find your voice soon. Please try joining Toastmasters, if you are not inclined toward finding a coach/therapist.
    May 110
  • Nvidia ECTT56
    Sounds like you could use better friends or co-workers.
    May 110
  • Proud about being an employee? Hell no
    May 110
  • Be aware of your strengths and weaknesses. You work at Apple, trust me you do have many strengths .
    Once you have done that, accept yourself the way you are , and ignore your detractors
    May 110
  • New / EngBsky
    Good
    May 110

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