Husband is non-tech and joining the military

Lyft GoodJob!
Dec 28, 2018 20 Comments

My husband is going to basic training in January. He's non-tech, we're both in our mid 20s, married over a year, and living and working in NYC right now. He'll be stationed in Monterey, California after basic training where I'll be joining him.

Has anyone here ever had any experience with a partner or spouse going to the military? If so, any advice? I anticipate moving around every couple of years. I'm determined to make things work with... my work (Product).

How does one get started with a remote job when you don't have the remote work experience? Monterey is ~1.5 hours away from SF/San Jose so I could drive up, do on-site and remote. Any companies that offer flexibility of this kind?

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TOP 20 Comments
  • New TYjc83
    That’s a rough road. Try a company in Santa Cruz. They have a smallish tech footprint
    Dec 28, 2018 3
    • Amazon JSnowflake
      Amazon has an office in Santa Cruz too.
      Dec 28, 2018
    • Amazon NoYou2
      +1 Santa Cruz. Commuting even one day a wk to the Peninsula would be miserable. Is he going in as an enlisted man or officer? In other words can you live off base.
      Dec 28, 2018
    • Lyft GoodJob!
      OP
      I'll look at Santa Cruz! The closer the better, we can also live off base and can find a home that suits us both. He's going to graduate basic as an E3 so not officer. Thank you both.
      Dec 28, 2018
  • Lockheed Martin / Eng iEkO37
    Will he at least be an officer?
    Dec 28, 2018 1
    • Amazon Teabags
      What’s his TC?
      Dec 28, 2018
  • Salesforce / Eng ragnarr
    Looker (looker.com) is a pretty cool company based in Santa Cruz
    Dec 28, 2018 0
  • LinkedIn / Data mSNI75
    Facebook has shuttles from Santa Cruz. Guessing google does too.
    Dec 28, 2018 0
  • New
    JohnMcPop1

    New

    PRE
    Intel
    JohnMcPop1more
    Time to switch, start preparation, get better offer and negotiate with current. If no better response then switch(husband).

    That's what blinders says!
    Dec 28, 2018 0
  • Shape Security / Other
    qAkK63

    Shape Security Other

    BIO
    SOC Analyst
    qAkK63more
    I was at the DLI in Monterey for language training. Is that what your husband is doing? I didn’t get into tech until after leaving the military so I can’t really advise there, but I wish you luck. It’s a hell of a ride for both soldier and spouse, as my wife can attest.
    Dec 28, 2018 1
    • Lyft GoodJob!
      OP
      Yep that's what he's going to do! It sure sounds like it haha. I'm happy you found tech afterwards!
      Dec 28, 2018
  • Medallia hFEH36
    I am available to provide you company when you feel alone. :)
    Dec 28, 2018 1
    • Illumina / Other
      activesite

      Illumina Other

      PRE
      Illumina
      activesitemore
      Jody gonna get his ass kicked
      Dec 28, 2018
  • Intel MovinOn
    I was in the army and married the whole time... My wife worked in SWE, and had to put up with our moves.

    You will find there is a super strong support infrastructure for military spouses. I am not saying it will be easy... But many spouses who are technical are able to find remote work options.
    Dec 28, 2018 0
  • Illumina / Other
    activesite

    Illumina Other

    PRE
    Illumina
    activesitemore
    You could look for companies that do business with the DOD. They will definitely be as flexible and cooperative as they can be.
    Dec 28, 2018 0
  • Google spacehorse
    My husband is in the army.

    Depending on your husband's MOS he could either be moving every few years or not at all. Some careers there is only one location they can work, and they're there until they either leave the military or change to another MOS. He should be able to find that out. Deployments also depend on his MOS so find out the expected schedule and you can plan based on that. For example if he's deploying for a year you could take a temporary/contract job in another city while he's gone.

    Telling prospective employers you're a military spouse can be hit or miss. Some will appreciate it and be willing to work with you, while others will assume it means you're going to be PCSing in 1-2 years and not hire you. I personally don't mention it, if asked why I am relocating I keep it vague and say I want to be closer to family.

    Honestly it's not an easy life being a career-oriented military spouse. The military (and the military community) assume you don't work and consider you a dependent of him rather than an independent adult with your own life and career. You will probably need to make sacrifices since his job will always come before yours (given that he can't refuse a PCS, a deployment, or other work trip). That said it's possible to make it work and the benefits can be good.
    Dec 28, 2018 3
    • Are you a software engineer?
      Dec 28, 2018
    • Google spacehorse
      I am not.
      Dec 28, 2018
    • Lyft GoodJob!
      OP
      Hey spacehorse! Thank you! This is all great advice.

      He is a CTI in the Navy (Interpretive Cryptologic Technician). So we know he'll have his "A School" for ~2 years in Monterey CA at DLI. "C School" is more dependent on his language, like if he gets an Asian Language he'll be in Hawaii about 1.5 years. CTI's don't do the typical deployment, normally not on a ship or in the air, nor in combat, but usually have a deployment outside the US and in Continental US.

      I also think it is probably best to not say I'm a military spouse. I'm just unsure where to apply and when. Relocating... and I would need to get my driver's license and a car. Definitely not going to be an easy start to the new year haha.

      I'm prepared to be making some sacrifices. Luckily, I can find an opportunity to continue what I do where we're going. And there are many benefits for us and we can start a small family before his 6 year contract ends, too. But yes, I didn't think I'd be a military spouse when I married and thought we'd be in NYC for a long time. I'm looking forward to this new adventure and what the military community is like.

      Was it a difficult transition or is there a lot of support the military provides?
      Dec 28, 2018
  • Rosetta Stone DRUQ06
    Don’t try to drive north from Monterey to San Jose. People are coming in on 101 that direction from all parts South and traffic is a nightmare. So it’s not 1.5 hours during commute times. There are some consulting type firms around that do military contracts in that area. In general, pay around Monterey area is relatively poor compared to Bay Area.
    Dec 28, 2018 0