Indian women dating non Indian men

Microsoft Dshxfgv
Sep 10 158 Comments

Recently broke up with Indian boyfriend. I was always closed off to the idea of dating non Indian men, but I'm 28 and I feel the pressure. Two of my friends married non Indian men and they couldn't be happier. So it makes me think. What has your experience been? Are there dating apps where you can meet people looking for serious relationships so that you can weed out the casual daters? P.S I'm from Seattle.

Also, I'm going to be trying dating apps for the first time. Any helpful advice appreciated.

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TOP 158 Comments
  • GE eifa03
    Hello Honey, I am from Seattle too. I am a guy but in similar boat looking to expand to non-indian women. But would love to date Indian too. Shall we meet honey?

    TC: 275K
    Sep 10 24
    • Tinder trolol
      I think bytec was referring to the OP of this comment, the real OP (Dshxfgv). :)
      7d
    • GE eifa03
      Thank you all sick people for painting something nice as vulgar.
      7d
    • Amazon / Eng
      weeeeeeee

      Amazon Eng

      BIO
      AWS
      weeeeeeeemore
      The knowledge you got from this conversation will probably save your ass in the future. It’s not about how you interpret what you say to some, it’s about they interpret it.
      7d
    • GE eifa03
      No wonder why they break up and how they build fragile relationships. It’s not about race/culture, it’s their personality
      7d
    • Amazon / Eng
      weeeeeeee

      Amazon Eng

      BIO
      AWS
      weeeeeeeemore
      Right, cultures vary by parts of the world.
      7d
  • Netflix / Product Thats_It
    As a white woman who is dating two Indian men, what’s the concern you have?

    One guy is American raised, the other Dubai/South Africa and lived in multiple countries as an adult.
    Sep 10 39
    • Cadence / Eng
      pretzle

      Cadence Eng

      PRE
      Intel Corporation
      pretzlemore
      @cmp- I won't.
      I like Alpha and Beta!
      7d
    • New / Data __cmp__
      There is a line of finesse between trolling and sarcastic. The lambda in poisson (poison) distribution calls about the arrival rate which is equivalent to a threshold in logistic regression for classification.
      7d
    • New / Data __cmp__
      @Thats_It I guess everyone knows that. Netflix and Chill doesn't go very well.

      And if you consider all men in Tech are like in Blind you're wrong. I would hangout elsewhere like HackerNe
      7d
    • Cadence / Eng
      pretzle

      Cadence Eng

      PRE
      Intel Corporation
      pretzlemore
      @cmp- I will be your friend if you promise me you won't bring Poisson distribution and Hadoop cluster. Deal?
      7d
    • New / Data __cmp__
      It's inherently hard to resist on love what you do.
      7d
  • eBay DickJonas
    Can ABCDs apply 😉
    Sep 10 8
    • Facebook / Other b1gswndik
      Sh1t is getting heated. Love it
      Sep 10
    • Credit Karma Fries 🍟
      LinkedIn profile for dating. Now it feels like Blind 😜
      Sep 10
    • New / Data __cmp__
      DM me your resume. We will meet over coffee
      Sep 10
    • eBay DickJonas
      😂😆🤣 well it was worth a shot guys 😎
      Sep 10
    • T-Mobile
      -matrix-

      T-Mobile

      PRE
      Microsoft
      -matrix-more
      Lol. Indian marriages are more like a job interview lol.
      5d
  • Walmart pingpongl4
    Im white, my first girlfriend was Indian. It was good.

    People are just people though. It doesn't matter
    Sep 10 2
    • Microsoft Dshxfgv
      OP
      Thank you. I'm looking for advice on how/where to approach non Indian guys or let them know I'm available. Are there dating apps for people wanting to be in a long term relationship?
      Sep 10
    • Walmart pingpongl4
      Try Hinge
      Sep 10
  • Microsoft whatdidyou
    Join a hobby club. Don’t read comments here posted by other Indian men. Dancing club (eg salsa or swing) is the way to go. People full of passion and emotion. Don’t join geeky clubs and expect to find a date.

    Also 28 is prime age for dating outside of a few countries. Where I am from (S Korea), college bound women typically marry at 30-38.

    If you are open to Asians, they are very interested in dating other races too. I know a several Korean and Taiwanese guys who married to middle east or Indian women (have kids now). They met while studying in grad school.

    I also saw a Blind post where a white guy was looking to date an Indian woman.
    Sep 10 11
    • GE eifa03
      Pregnancy at right age a narrow mindset? Anyway thanks for your opinion. At the end it’s OPs life and her decision. Good luck OP
      Sep 10
    • Microsoft whatdidyou
      I don’t think you understand the implication of the statement and can read by the context. You judged with your imaginary world. There are people who don’t have kids by decision as well.

      This all will new to you if you lived in a bubble. If you live in US, get out of your Indian circle and try to learn about other cultures. I don’t even know how to respond to your out of context comment.

      I feel sympathy for people with an open mindset like OP having had to endure judgement by the people like this. Hopefully younger generation of Indians will be better educated about social judgement.
      Sep 10
    • GE eifa03
      I don’t understand what you are talking about the culture. You are way too complex
      Sep 10
    • EY BL23
      @eifa03 are you a M or a F?
      4d
    • Amazon jQpf16
      GE the autism gene is passed by an aged father,,,, read up
      2d
  • Rivian sgSclx
    As a non Indian guy - desi girls 😍
    Sep 10 2
    • Roku
      roku🚀

      Roku

      PRE
      Yahoo, Oath
      roku🚀more
      “As an non”? You are Indian
      Or may be “as an naan”
      Sep 10
    • Rivian sgSclx
      Lol sorry - Blind lacks auto correct and I’m fat fingered from all the beer today.
      Sep 10
  • Google / HR
    nedo

    Google HR

    PRE
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    Googler
    nedomore
    Why don’t you like Indian men? And what is it about white men that interest you?
    Sep 10 6
    • Google / HR
      nedo

      Google HR

      PRE
      Google
      BIO
      Googler
      nedomore
      Gotcha!
      Sep 10
    • Expedia Group Galvin
      Hello, there are black men on Blind. Y’all should quit this neo-segregation
      Sep 10
    • Apple
      MrMandingo

      Apple

      BIO
      Strong and built like an Ox. I don’t look like your typical Engineer. 😀
      MrMandingomore
      The blacker the berry, the sweeter the juice ✊🏾
      Sep 10
    • Expedia Group Galvin
      Preach it brother/sister/uncle/auntie
      Sep 10
    • Amazon jQpf16
      Indian husband :
      wheres my underwear, wheres my socks , have you packed my lunch
      "have you called my parents, have you spoken to my mom this week"
      have you dated many men, are you a virgin in body mind and spirit
      kids are your responsibilty, while I want nothing changed in my life
      what is yiour caste, religion, gothra, horoscope
      I want to eat fresh food everyday, just like my mom makes - your rotis are not as round
      no harm in me checking out. flirting with/ sleeping with other women as long as I am not divorced and nobody finds out
      cheap date - why waste money on treating my wife to something special when she can make those aforementioned not round rotis for me
      why should i pay for my own wedding, we are the "boys side" - we cant take dowry but we can take gifts and your parents can pay for the wedding
      no need to work, stay home and look after the kids - oh wait no I want the TC, cancel that
      Wifes's ambition, personal growth, ambition - whats that??? my mother never had those why do you...
      when we visit India, we will stay with my parents, yeah ofcourse you may visit your parents just not everyday
      2d
  • Microsoft Atin|ay2
    Don't do it! You'll regret it. Keep Indian Indian.
    Sep 10 5
    • Splunk KHWo05worO
      This is a racist response.
      Sep 10
    • Microsoft Atin|ay2
      How? OP is racist for hating Indian men.
      Sep 10
    • SAP / IT
      IKRJ67

      SAP IT

      PRE
      PayPal, Barclays Investment Bank, Chevron
      BIO
      Portfolio career person
      IKRJ67more
      As per Russel Peters, “everyone gonna be beige” 😛
      Sep 10
    • Amazon / Eng
      weeeeeeee

      Amazon Eng

      BIO
      AWS
      weeeeeeeemore
      What value is there in keeping “Indian Indian”?
      Sep 10
    • New NidI04
      Idiots accusing the OP of racism can shut up!

      Indians are the most racist people on the planet. And someone says she doesn't want to date Indian, these scoundrels are screaming of racism.
      5d
  • Tinder trolol
    I think the key is to date an American guy, not necessarily any particular race. Americans have low expectations of our women compared to Asian cultures and you'll feel more relaxed.
    Sep 10 4
    • Microsoft Dshxfgv
      OP
      Do Americans also expect you to have low expectations from them? :) I am averse to casual relationships and would love to date people who can be upfront about that.
      Sep 10
    • Google / HR
      nedo

      Google HR

      PRE
      Google
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      Googler
      nedomore
      You should try dating a Mormon. They’re very serious about relationships
      Sep 10
    • Tinder trolol
      So that really depends, there's obviously a spectrum there. I can tell you personally the men I know would run if you mentioned relationship in the first couple weeks, unless they are desperate. You have to take it slow and let it grow naturally.

      Don't be pushy, don't force him to see you. If he's not making time, move on if it doesn't feel right. Can't tell you how many times I've seen girlfriends cling to men that were clearly not interested, so if you're really looking for something serious you have to be patient but also aware of what he's looking for.

      Most men will appreciate you being upfront though.
      Sep 10
    • Microsoft Dshxfgv
      OP
      Thank you.
      Sep 10
  • Groupon AQI
    I think Indian women should stay with Indian. We have very different culture, it would be hard for Americans to understand! Eventually you run into problems, family, little traditions, religion, celebrations etc
    Sep 10 6
    • Groupon AQI
      I am not, did I say I was?
      Sep 10
    • Microsoft Atin|ay2
      You can date or just sleep with non-Indians for fun. But eventually you will marry an Indian man for the reasons AQI stated
      Sep 10
    • Tinder trolol
      It's pretty closed minded and backwards to think Indians can't be with non-Indians. I'm married to an Indian woman (non-Indian) and three of her cousins are married to white guys. The biggest problem so far? What to name the kids 😂
      Sep 10
    • Facebook rYhu00
      Groupon she can do whatever she wants. And maybe you're slow to understand other cultures, doesn't mean she can't. Even if she does, those are her choices and her problems.
      7d
    • Amazon jQpf16
      I dated many Indian men before marrying my non indian husband. The Indian men sucked. I am so much the happier that I did not marry Indian. absolutely no issues, life is a dream. dont listen to this fool, marry who you want.
      2d
  • Wayfair Lhafsnek
    I am an Indian woman married to an American man. We met through run of the mill dating site (okcupid). I was not intending to extend my dating pool beyond Indian then, but my husband reached out to me twice so I went out on a casual date and the rest is history. people are people and it’s your chemistry and level of expectations from your relationship that matter more than ethnicities. I was averse to casual dating and pretty much communicated that within first 3 dates and he was ok with it. Good luck in finding a good partner.
    7d 1
    • Microsoft tech29
      "people are people and it’s your chemistry and level of expectations from your relationship that matter more than ethnicities. "

      This is great advice. Be open than targeting a race.
      7d
  • Splunk KHWo05worO
    Why are you feeling pressured? Biological clock ticking away?
    Sep 10 3
    • Microsoft Dshxfgv
      OP
      That's a different conversation altogether
      Sep 10
    • Splunk KHWo05worO
      You didn’t answer why you feel pressured.
      Sep 10
    • Microsoft Dshxfgv
      OP
      Like I said, it's irrelevant to the question I have posted. I have enough advice from the blind community on why I shouldn't take decisions based on age. 🙂
      Sep 10
  • New NidI04
    Indians are the most racist people on the planet. They wouldn't even date outside their caste let alone race!

    And someone says she doesn't want to date Indian, these people are screaming of racism.

    Never seen such hypocrites like desis.
    5d 1
    • Cadence / Eng
      pretzle

      Cadence Eng

      PRE
      Intel Corporation
      pretzlemore
      OK. Yawwwn
      5d
  • T-Mobile
    -matrix-

    T-Mobile

    PRE
    Microsoft
    -matrix-more
    I'm Indian, married to a white girl from IOWA with a military family. We have beautiful kids! It's awesome. There are a lot of challenges though. Primarily around family. Her side is mostly republicans. Mine are somewhat conservative (in India).

    Try to find someone without kids. It will make it that much easier with the family and logistics. I think everyone should expand beyond their race, caste, and creed.
    7d 2
    • Microsoft Dshxfgv
      OP
      How did you manage to get your family on board?
      7d
    • T-Mobile
      -matrix-

      T-Mobile

      PRE
      Microsoft
      -matrix-more
      My parents tried to get me married for five years, so I lowered the frequency of my communication with them. One day, I called them and talked about my GF. I mentioned that I had known her for a few years, and we were dating. Then, I said that I wanted to marry her (I think we were engaged at that point) and stated that she was a few months older to me, divorced, and had a kid. They were quite shocked but sounded like they were okay with it during that conversation. Later on, they started playing mind games. I didn't want to deal with that, so we got married in court. When I communicated that, they were flummoxed and said we didn't think you were serious...you must have an Indian wedding. They flew-in almost immediately and forced us into it. In hindsight, I should have walked away from that as I didn't want any of that.
      6d
  • Autodesk leetyeet
    Go out to bars, join a club, meet people at the gym, there's plenty of places where you meet people outside dating apps. As far as seriousness is concerned, most relationships start because people are serious, they become casual when you don't want to put in the effort. You'll have to date your way out of this one.
    Sep 10 2
    • Microsoft Dshxfgv
      OP
      This seems logical. How do you master the art of finding guys who are even looking for relationships?
      Sep 10
    • Google Ben Dover.
      ^ pretty much every single guy is looking for a relationship 😂
      Sep 10
  • Cadence / Eng
    pretzle

    Cadence Eng

    PRE
    Intel Corporation
    pretzlemore
    Unfortunately, I only get matched with Indian guys even though I don't check that ethnicity as option. I think it's too impolite to put it on my profile that I am not looking for my own country men.

    No Surprises - Bay Area, I almost thought I should move else where, but seeing other places have similar problems that doesn't seem to be a solution.
    Sep 10 6
    • Cadence / Eng
      pretzle

      Cadence Eng

      PRE
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      pretzlemore
      Which part is?
      Sep 10
    • Microsoft Dshxfgv
      OP
      That they match you with people of your own ethnicity. Which app is this?
      Sep 10
    • Cadence / Eng
      pretzle

      Cadence Eng

      PRE
      Intel Corporation
      pretzlemore
      CMB, Hinge or whatever
      Sep 10
    • Amazon protonn
      Haha. So unfortunate. Getting 1000s of brown matches and tough to filter out the few 100 whites?
      Sep 10
    • T-Mobile
      -matrix-

      T-Mobile

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      -matrix-more
      Population crisis exhibiting here as well, lol
      5d
  • FICO FgTS40
    Others in the forum may not like it but a piece of fatherly advice. Everything might work okay with non-Indian (or even ABCD's) for 5-10+ years but eventually, they can leave you at the whim when you are not ready for it. Now, this can happen with the Indian guy as well, but IMO chances would be much less.

    Though it doesn't imply that non-Indian would leave you for sure, but statically speaking probably would be much higher.
    Sep 10 3
    • Microsoft Dshxfgv
      OP
      I would rather be left in an unhappy marriage, than stick with one person unhappily for a lifetime. Seriously guys, where is all this knowledge and stereotype coming from?
      7d
    • EY BL23
      Blind should have a dislike button🤣. Indians usually stick around in unhappy marriages because of societal pressure- thats not a virtue to stand for.
      4d
    • Amazon jQpf16
      Indian men just ignore you and live their own happy life if the marriage does not work. that is in no way an indication of a succesful marriage. On all other parameters Indian men rank low as husbands.
      2d
  • VMware
    doof_s

    VMware

    PRE
    Dell, General Motors
    doof_smore
    I actually know a girl who went through exact same thing as you. She was at Microsoft, broke up with an Indian guy, after a few years of looking around she found a white boyfriend (European), later they got married and now have a couple of kids too.
    Sep 10 2
    • Microsoft Dshxfgv
      OP
      How did she meet him?
      Sep 10
    • VMware
      doof_s

      VMware

      PRE
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      doof_smore
      She left Seattle to go work in a different company. While there she was introduced by a co-worker to his European friend who was also looking. I guess they had chemistry and everything fell in place...
      Sep 10
  • Amazon protonn
    Desi will have better chances and patience of understanding family issues that can arise. I doubt other cultures can understand these issues. It will take a generation more for these issues to get normalized. Until then, statistically,. Desi2desi is better by design. Of course, not everything is about probability, might as well take a leap of faith if you do fall in love.
    Sep 10 1
    • Tinder trolol
      This is true, but doesn't fit everyone, not even desi2desi. For example, my wife's father is on his third marriage. Pretty sure that's uncommon in Indian culture. She has abandoned any sense of caring what the family thinks and we are completely self sufficient. But we still practice traditions and had a traditional Indian wedding. True Americans :D

      My point is that I think it's not important what the race or background of the other person is, but rather if you connect and love each other.
      7d
  • U.S. Dpt. of Veterans Affairs / Other zxcvbnx
    What are you looking for in a guy? I might have someone great for you. Definitely husband material. Is Indian.
    Sep 10 2
    • Microsoft Dshxfgv
      OP
      Would rather not give out such details on the thread here :)
      Sep 10
    • @dept is that you yourself?😂😂
      Sep 10