Money

Married people finance

Sumo Logic idkj
Mar 12

How do married people manage finance? Do you both share rent and other expenses or just one person pays?

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  • New
    EMVH32

    New

    PRE
    Amazon
    EMVH32more
    Split every home expense. Don’t comingle bank accounts. If you do those things you will keep a major source of conflict out of your relationship.
    Mar 127
    • Google SWE dπ
      'marriage'
      Mar 12
    • Google 🧠fry
      Don’t merry someone you can’t have shared account with.
      Mar 12
    • Bloomberg iVX372
      Why on earth would you want someone else spending your money? That's ludicrous. The only people who state otherwise are guys who think no woman would date them without spending more money on her than she spends in return, or their manipulative partners.
      Mar 12
    • PayPal da anomaly
      Lol, what’s the point of getting married if it’s not a partnership? Just date if that’s what you want.
      Mar 12
    • Microsoft sOunderz
      Married for more than 10 years. Don’t have shared account. Not a necessity IMO
      Mar 12
    • Bloomberg iVX372
      It can be a partnership without sharing money. You're committing a logical fallacy by assuming it can only be a partnership with shared finances.

      Would you consider yourself only to be friends with someone if you shared finances with them? Of course not. So why extend this flawed logic to marriage, for anything but archaic views of the man financially supporting the woman?
      Mar 13
    • PayPal da anomaly
      Friends = marriage? Really? Guess I’m out of touch.
      Mar 13
  • Amazon away.throw
    Combine your finances into one pool. Complete transparency. Have a conversation at least once a month about your budget and purchases. Set some boundary beyond which you discuss purchases ($20, $50, whatever). Set long term priorities and goals and track progress towards them.

    Give yourself some splurge money for each other (gifts, dates) every month.
    Mar 121
    • Roku ________
      Not this, it would require a large change for the one that makes more going into the relationship. Always keep separate accounts and live like you did before, then split bills where each doesn't see a huge increase compared to single life.
      Mar 12
  • Jet.com mFFY55
    Etherium

    My wife and I convert most of our cash assets to ETH. We then use smart contracts for most common purchases. In the event of a divorce we feel this will allow for us to clearly represent each persons share allowing us to sell or transfer to a new partner(s) on either side.
    Mar 122
    • Nice! So you can both lose all your earnings together!
      Mar 12
    • Salesforce 0dark30
      😂😂😂
      Mar 12
  • Amazon 1234#
    Share in proportions to income
    Mar 121
  • Cisco Sipowicz
    We’ve always kept our separate accounts simply because it’s easier to manage, don’t have to check in with one another on purchases. We decided who pays what bills and it’s taken care of each month. We have access to each other’s accounts just in case something happened to one of us but we don’t actually take money out of each other’s accounts or check balances. Thirty years and still happy. Do what works for you. There is no “right” way.
    Mar 120
  • Micro Focus / ProductGWOz11
    Spouse and I had a combined TC of 60k out of school (10+ years ago). We did joint account and have never looked back. We make sure all bills are accounted for.

    I don't think you'll find the 'perfect' answer here. You should talk this out with your partner and see what fits you both. Folks here have wicked TC's and want to make sure it's being spent wisely.
    Mar 131
    • Amazon away.throw
      Yep.

      If you both have high TC, you can be fine keeping separate finances. That’s not the choice we made.
      Mar 13
  • Glu Mobile PQSK63
    Combine everything, pay from single account. Marriage is about trust, respect and being honest with each other. If you and your spouse cannot trust each other on finances, what can you trust each other on?
    Mar 120
  • Apple / EngSwiftDev
    We do the combined thing. Got married when we had nothing. It was super easy to combine. Worked our way into success together and kept it that way. We keep a budget and discuss any major purchases. It works well for us. But as others said, find what works for you. For some, combining everything is a major stressor. So just have a discussion and talk through. Don’t be afraid to try something and adapt as you go.
    Mar 120
  • New / Eng
    errfileno

    NewEng

    PRE
    Microsoft
    BIO
    Senior Software Engineer. 15yoe. Seattle. $205k TC
    errfilenomore
    Partner has her credit card, I have mine. Her spending priorities and mine differ in many ways, but we respect that and don't itemise each other's bills. We pay both off to zero from the communal pot every cycle, and we discuss large purchases in advance to ensure we don't both spend big in a month without knowing it.

    Lease and recurring expenses also come out of the communal pot.

    All money we make goes into the communal pot or a savings vehicle held by our Revokable Living Trust. We don't currently pull in the same salaries as each other, and that is okay.

    We set savings goals, and I have a spreadsheet that tracks our progress using trailing-one, -three, and twelve-month moving averages, and we have conversations about trends roughly once a month, but we don't sweat it too much if we miss the mark here and there -- that's what the longer-tail moving averages are about. We make attaining those goals a bit of a game, and we take turns writing one-line appreciation notes for each other in a notebook, which does a lot to quell resentment early and often.
    Mar 121
    • eBay / IT
      manorama

      eBayIT

      BIO
      Coder
      manoramamore
      Any samples on how do you plot moving averages and how do you begin with ? Any reference for a new joiner doing same would be awesome as well
      Mar 13
  • Salesforce hfgnntunv
    Combine finances. That way you can have whole picture and work together towards your goals. If you have to, allocate x amount per month each of you can spend no questions asked.
    We had split finances for a first couple years and it was a total pain in the butt.
    Mar 131
    • Salesforce hfgnntunv
      This obviously only works if you are married to financially responsible person who shares your financial priorities.
      Mar 13
  • Microsoft khggnk
    We just split the major bills.
    This approach is low maintenance and works well so Never felt the need to have a joint account.
    We believe in the ‘Keep it Simple Sweet’ principle :)
    Mar 130
  • DocuSign helllllllo
    I manage all the finances including my spouse salary. It works well for us.
    Mar 120
  • Google goog-mtv
    No split she just takes one flat amount and rest is on me in a combined salary. Works awesome
    Mar 120
  • Salesforce 123gogo
    I wish... :/
    Mar 120

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