My wife is moving ahead. I can't catch up
We both came from a very restrict 3rd world country and religious families. When she met I was the liberal one and she felt I saved her. (quoting from her) We then moved to the U.S. and evolved in the culture and our ideology. We were feeling happy to explore the new world with much more freedom and rights. Our minds started to think deeper about everything. She's smart and her acceleration of change was much more than mine, although my initial speed was higher. Now after a decade I can't catch up with her. She's far ahead of me (reminds me of the movie "Her". The feeling of the man in the end was extremely relatable to me). I feel sad and afraid that she'll leave me someday because I'm not a competent match for her anymore. P.S. I asked her several times if she'd leave me someday, and she says no, but I know she's saying it just because of the guilt she feels inside, not because she's not happy with me anymore. Just wanted to vent :( Update: Someone messaged me this and it's exactly our life: "back in our country, I was the best man she could ever ask for, but when we came here and after our evolution, I'm not a fit for her all all. Like I would dream to marry such an intellectual if we were here, and she would never choose me."
I don't have an advice for you. But I really wish you good luck :)
That sucks, bro. Maybe lift weights.
Weights? For what?
Get in better shape.
If she felt you saved her, that is something she will never forget.
That's my only hope :(
This sounds like something that has been bothering you and causing anxiety for a while. Maybe be super upfront and repeat what you just said here to her.
Your insecurity will kill your relationship not your wife's speed of progress. Would you leave her if the case was opposite? You're just thinking too much. She loves you for you you are and just do what you love and be good at it
I don't know the answer if it the opposite. I love her and can't think of any world that I'd live without her.
I agree here!
Divorce her before she leaves you and make it look like you dumped her
Which 3rd world country? Suggestions are highly contextual
You are insecure. I will never forget the people who supported me when I was struggling (physically, financially or emotionally). Indeed, now that I am independent, I like to do things for them. I call them often, visit them, buy them small gifts, etc. It's a way or expressing gratitude for making me who I am today and supporting me when I needed them most. You should be happy that she has grown as a person. If she is a good person, she will be thankful to you and will carry this journey forward together. But if you still feel that insecurity, you should talk to her. Have an honest and open conversation, let her know how you feel. The title of your post is weird - compete? You don't compete with the people you love. I hope you both realize this. All the best.
Should have used "catch up". Thanks
Keep asking her, she'll eventually agree with you.
🎻