This is a weird situation that I'm facing right now, we were having a conversation related to our future and it drifted towards things/goals that I've set for myself (in the coming years), and also things that I wanted her to try out in the long run. And all of a sudden, she tells me that I deserve someone better and she feels unworthy of some sorts. Women, of the blind community have you faced such situation and how did you evaluate it?
Sheās coming up with excuses to break up with you. She found someone else
That's what I told my girl friend when breaking up... this is a very good way as the other person thinks you are very honest...
Honestly this is break up talk. Something deep is brewing in her, and she feels guilty for feeling it. Sheās kind enough to say this to you which is essentially, āitās not you, itās me.ā
What would happen if we still try to give the relationship a shot? Feeling unworthy seems a least of an issue to end a relationship.
Someone I was seeing broke up with me for this reason. It feels like a stupid reason, but given it's not uncommon, maybe it's not. It can be a result of other reasons like unwillingness to commit, losing interest, feeling like it's too much work etc. It's a sugar coated way of saying - "you are a great person but I am not interested in having this relationship with you, and I feel bad for hurting a good person".
Girl told me that before she callously tossed me away like garbage. I was more into her then she was into me. You show her way too much affection. It's sad but, that's what I did with the chick i was with. I like to think (I hope) that women arent like this as they get older. But women in their early-mid 20s are First-Class heart-breakers. It surely has helped shaped my opinion of women in general.
Sorry to hear about your situation. But I am positive my SO is not of the same nature. Also, were you able to come out of that situation and find a deserving one?
Nah.. and I'm not trying to hijack your post nor make it about me by any means. All im saying is that. Men say what we mean. Women want you to guess what they are feeling. By the time you figure it out, it's too late usually.
You probably overwhelmed her with you aspirations. She is probably a lot more mellow than you and you probably sounded like too much too fast for her.
Female here. I am thinking if she wants a more low key life and has pictured that in her mind (regular mundane stuff); now with all these goals you have set, she feels she can't match up? Is this an outcome of her own lack of goals or just different ones. "things I wanted her try on" - ask what she wants to do; Ask yourself if you want a different version of her. I know a couple, the guy who is into fitness, reads, and generally more ambitious marries my friend who is not into sports, like playing a violin and watches soap opera. I remember so clearly early on before they got married he said to me - "I will train her, get her into running and blah blah" ; In my mind I was thinking - why are you trying to change her! Why do you want to take her and have your version of her. Several times I have heard her say what your GF is saying "he doesn't deserve me" I hope this helps.
This to me seems like a more plausible reason. She is perfect for me. My assumption is that the goals/aspirations are implicitly creating expectations for her as well.
I honestly think instead of laying a plan for her; you have to let her do what she enjoys. Slowly if she finds interest in whatever you are asking her or suggesting her then she will volunteer. Now you have given her a blueprint and she feels overwhelmed.
Couples usually adapt each other's traits, so even without overwhelming her, she may for all you know pick all those stuff you like her to. The single person giving advice to a couple! FML
šš¼this adapt. OP since you said sheās perfect for you have you considered you may be making her uncomfortable to be āperfectā to what you think she should be? Itās great you laid it all out to your gf but it sounds (like most guys do) too fast, cut, and dry š Slow down, make some of your goals more fun like a game (I.e. letās see how far we can run this time or go to a museum/artsy place that aligns with your inspiration so she can be inspired in a fun way. Most importantly, enjoy the moments more. Again too many guys just like to lay it all out and it tends to be too much too fast. Next, I always find in relationships itās good to know and then want whatās best for someone. Do you know what she wants is best? That will help her feel like you know her longer-term needs vs just explaining your own vision of the two of you.
Was this a passing comment in the heat of the moment? If so, donāt take every little thing she says to heart. Weāre human and have fleeting emotions that happen. Also, sometimes I feel that way when Iām on my period. Lots of hormones raging in your body can sometimes make a person not feel themselves.
She already cheated on you. This is her psychological inner workings in gear to help stave off the pangs of guilt and legitimatize the new Beau. The beauty of this is she creates psychological salve for her misdeeds, breaks up with you, exonerates herself from your justifiable anger and makes room for new lover. Judges score 10 across the board on this play.
Tech Industry
Yesterday
1745
What is the appeal to NVIDIA?
Tech Industry
Yesterday
1660
300k fully remote vs 450k 3x RTO, which would you choose?
2024 Presidential Election
Yesterday
1500
If you vote for Biden this year, don't complain about layoffs
Tech Industry
Yesterday
8713
Goog Employees Arrested
Software Engineering Career
Yesterday
2532
28 terrorist worshipping idiots just got themselves fired and I've never been prouder to work at Google.
And why does she feel unworthy? Need more info to assess your situation
I was telling her about my dreams & aspirations, and she suddenly ends up saying it.