I don’t have kids myself so I’d appreciate some opinions from blind folks: most people say raising kids is the most difficult challenge a person could ever experience. However, how can that be true? Literally the vast majority of people end up having kids and raising them ok-ish on average (otherwise society would collapse in a generation), so by definition is something easily accomplishable. So, while I understand it is very tiring and requires a lot of effort... is spending 18 years to raise a kid really more difficult than spending a couple decades focusing on chasing stellar TCs, becoming CEO or a successful politician? Sometimes I feel that’s just what people like to say to justify to themselves why they are not doing anything else with their lives besides raising kids.
Society isn't doing too well. Also - its a ~20 year commitment you can't back out of, and involves lack of sleep for the first few years and a dumb rebellious teenager in the middle. It also ruins your social life, spare time, vacation planning etc.
Raising kids is ok, raising them without spanking or ipad 24/7 is a whole different thing. If you can’t ignore your kids needs and have a high bar regarding your kid’s development then it is hard.
Effort and complexity are two different things. If you define ‘difficult’ to just mean ‘effort’ then sure, it takes 16+ years to raise a kid so that’s a lot of effort.
it's a lifetime commitment
(Not a parent, but been thinking about this a bunch) I suspect part of it might be that success in this area is pretty poorly defined. A lot of people that say this also have otherwise challenging careers etc., and I feel like they're trying to compare. I think the point they're trying to get across is, while there's a pretty clear path to getting better at your job, there isn't really a clear path to being a good parent. There's only (at most) two of you, and probably not too many good role models (I feel like I don't agree with the parental styles of most people I know). You can't get better at parenting by taking classes, or working with a mentor, or being put on an improvement plan like you can with work. A lot of the time, you probably don't even know if you're doing a bad job until it's too late. It's easy to fuck up, and when you fuck up, there's a good chance that there will be lasting consequences. On top of all this, there's a good part of parenting that just really isn't up to you, and is determined by genetics / temperament of you child.
Let's see: 1) it costs a lot of money for toys, clothes, food, medical, and all sorts of bills 2) in the USA most households both parents have to work in order to have a decent income and child care is expensive! Example for twin infants it was more a month than my mortgage 3) most employers are not flexible when it comes to the needs of the employees children. 4) the first few years you get a lot less sleep than you did before, like the most sleep deprived in your life children generate more laundry, dishes and mess than you would believe an infant needs 7 bottles a day when I had twins we were averaging 16 bottles a day and 3 loads of laundry. 5) sleep deprivation, messy house and having less money is stressful and it often causes stress between the parents 6) Family start telling you how to raise your kids and your life like you wouldn't believe 7) women who have kids are often penalized and loose income while men tend to get a raise. There are lots of reasons it's difficult and lots of reasons it's good.
The sleep deprivation is real. I would randomly break down in tears at work over how tired I was.
Don’t think it’s that difficult. Just time consuming and all encompassing. However the ROI is higher than monetary pursuits in my experience YMMV
Raising a kid ‘well’ is the difficult part.
Think it’s a part of your life. Once you have kids, you will love it no matter whether it’s a lot of work.
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Raising a kid is not difficult, just lots of work. To educate a kid well is the most difficult thing yes. It’s like becoming CEO yourself VS teaching the kid to become a CEO in the future.