A few weeks ago, I came across an article on signs that you may be in an emotionally abusive relationship, and some of them hit alarmingly close to home. * I feel nervous and guilty whenever I suggest that I or we see friends of mine, even if it's the neighbor next door, because my wife will complain, try to talk me out of it, or guilt trip me (We/she visits hers weekly as a matter of course). * Several days per week I walk on eggshells, cancelling plans that day, avoiding making loud noises while cleaning up, not bringing up simple things like us being out of bread, because I don't want to set her off when she's mad at work or lost a video game * I do all the cooking, cleaning and housework. She occasionally makes promises to improve this, but doesn't keep them. I brought this up this morning, and she got mad. She said that nothing she had done was wrong, that there was nothing she should work on, and that I have no friends but that I can go do whatever I want and feel abused if I want to. I held out some hope that she would at least acknowledge that it's not ok for one partner to feel like this whether or not it's warranted, but I feel stupid for thinking that might happen now. I don't even know why I'm posting this. Please commence your suggestions for divorce. TC: 380k
Read No more mr nice guy and implement tips. (Also it’s not about “nice guys” the Internet memes, but rather guys in your situation.)
Divorce. Good luck for your future. It is good you are taking a stand for yourself and drawing a line on what you will allow others to do to hurt you. If you have no kids, this is a clean break. Your wife won’t change with no consequences. The biggest consequence of her abusive behavior is a divorce.
how long you have been married? kids? when did this start? is it getting worse? if no kid I will kick her out, not worth it to leave with somone like that, but up to you man.
3 years, no kids. It got really bad last year because she hated her job. She switched early this year which helped, so at least I'm walking on eggshells weekly rather than daily
Life is full of frustrating moments. If she is abusive towards you when frustrated with her own problems guess what, it’s going to keep happening over and over and over. Don’t bring a child under this toxic environment. There are millions of women out in the world, keep that in mind. Best of luck.
Her response is shitty. Leave. Now.
That's awful. If you wanna salvage the marriage, seek counceling. If she doesn't want or there's no improvement, leave her. Life is too short to be stuck feeling unhappy and abused. Be strong!
Feel sorry for you. Take care buddy
Leave
Definitely communicate how you feel. Like not a summary, tell her everything. And after that, if she is not willing to compromise, leave! I honestly think you need to get out, however, you may regret a portion of it, if you didn't not really give it a fighting chance - aka see a counselor or really sit her down and explain everything to her. I would give her a list, like everything you showed above. P.S. You should never do all of the cleaning, cooking, and housework! That is crazy!
She needs therapy first because she's probably got some traumas pent up that creates her need for control of environment and you
Seek counseling first