Reply to personal questions

New ANSi83
Jun 11 9 Comments

What should be the answer or reply to someone in the office if he is asking you “ are you married” or “do you have kids”?
(If you are not comfortable sharing personal information but don’t want to be rude).


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TOP 9 Comments
  • Oath Atinlay2
    What is wrong with either of those questions? Lighten up! Are you in witness protection or something?

    Your co-workers are not your enemy! Next time you’ll be posting that nobody wants to hang out with you.

    You are the problem. Not them.
    Jun 11 2
    • Apple PTSE75
      It can get uncomfortable.

      I’m gay. 50 something Indian colleague asked if I’m married in my first week at the job. I said “yes, been about 6 months”. Guy asks me if *she* has also moved to California, to which I say, “ Oh, my husband is from the Bay Area”. Guy gave the weirdest blank stare for a second, asked me if I really did say “husband”. I said yes, he said “Okay”, and went back to his business,abruptly ending our conversation.

      I’m not saying that there were negative consequences of this interaction. But every time someone asks me if I have a girlfriend or if I’m married, my heart skips a beat.

      @Oath, I know where you are coming from. There’s nothing wrong with these questions. But you might put your colleague on the spot.
      Jun 11
    • Oath Atinlay2
      I get where you are coming from, to me that sounds like an issue on the side of the person who asked the question. If they aren’t prepared for the answer or have issues with it, that’s their problem not yours.

      I wish you didn’t even have the anxiety of worrying about being asked, but I understand. I think you’ll find most people will accept that answer just fine and be happy to know you better!
      Jun 11
  • Target / Eng tmDe33
    "I can't have children."

    **oh that's so sad**

    "Yeah the judge made that VERY CLEAR to me."
    Jun 11 0
  • Oracle / Other mightymint
    Jun 11 0
  • Google nrvD43
    "I don't mean to be rude, but I prefer not to talk about personal matters at work."
    Jun 11 0
  • Lockheed Martin Iusahjbbvc
    Laugh and change the subject. I do that often and I'm female. I understand women smile "too much" but I always think of Dr. Hibbert ...
    Jun 13 0
  • You can simply say you’d prefer to keep work stuff at work and personal stuff personal, but just know this is very common office banter. You are going to have a hard time establishing repertoire with people if you don’t ever want to discuss your life.

    Now having said that, if you got the vibe they were asking those things as prologue before hitting on you or something then that’s a different story. In that case being rude isn’t the issue, just tell them you are beginning to feel a little uncomfortable with the line of questioning. Or just let him ask you out and shut him down. Either way these are pretty standard social situations you should be able to navigate through at this point.
    Jun 11 0
  • Microsoft SGgY28
    How its like you don't have friends, no family around you and kids left you and no one to burry you after death. Moral: make friends in office. Share stories with family. Help neighbours.
    Jun 11 0