Should I just ignore someone always making racist remarks?

New zlzg812
Jul 7 21 Comments

There's this young woman at the office who was educated in the US and she makes persistent racist comments about me and the other white guy in our company.

She also often makes racist jokes about Indians in our team, but she kind of laughs when she's doing it, and they don't seem to kind either. When she's doing something like "what are you talking about, white boy", she looks pretty hateful.

I don't really care she's doing that, especially since I understand that's probably what she is used to and you can't change a person, but still, is there something that can be done or should be done at all?

I think reporting someone to HR for a minor thing like this would be crazy. It doesn't affect work and shit gets done anyway. Other colleagues at the office don't make the remarks like she does. This is a medium sized company outside the US.

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TOP 21 Comments
  • Amazon ohbother
    Behavior like this should be called out immediately. If you’re not comfortable chastising her, you should just ask her to repeat herself every time as if you didn’t hear (e.g. “I’m sorry, didn’t catch that?). People generally feel dumb repeating offensive things when someone is being polite, doing it every time will be enough of a pattern that she’ll probably lessen the behavior.
    Jul 7 1
    • Goldman Sachs faith91
      Wow. I like this!
      Jul 7
  • Akuna Capital / R&D 3-SAT
    Depends on your local laws; in the US this would probably considered a hostile work environment
    Jul 7 0
  • Seagate toti420
    Where’s she from? I can teach you how to give her a taste of her own medicine.
    Jul 7 5
    • New dBBO43
      Don't fight fire with fire, always going to lead to something bad. Just invite her to get her head out of her ass.
      Jul 7
    • Seagate toti420
      You prefer he write a letter telling her how inappropriate her comments are? Maybe invite her for a discussion over an afternoon tea?
      Jul 7
    • Goldman Sachs faith91
      @seagate So, you are trying to say that OP should be racist in return? I hope you do realize that being racist doesn’t mean being racist to an individual but to an entire community!
      Jul 7
    • Seagate toti420
      In all honesty, no! I don’t think he should make racist remarks. BUT...he could point out stereotypes about her background so she could understand that her comments are hurtful to others.
      Jul 7
    • PayPal forEachN
      Slippery slope bruh
      Yesterday
  • Microsoft Motown
    Report her to HR or in case of inaction give her a taste of her own medicine. Call her out for what she is - a racist.
    Jul 7 0
  • Google Devil
    This needs to be reported to HR. I missed an opportunity like that in the past . He was fired but had I reported it would have had some way earlier with little damage.
    Jul 7 0
  • Microsoft
    🤡🌎bro

    Microsoft

    PRE
    Albertsons
    🤡🌎bromore
    Escalate. Next time she says something racist, say something sexist in retaliation.
    Jul 7 1
    • Apple procto
      Don’t do this. The second wrong is always punished. The instigator walks.
      Jul 7
  • Apple procto
    HR is generally evil. I would inform your manager of the situation. Say that you don’t necessarily expect action but wanted to report the situation. That gives you some cover.
    Jul 7 0
  • Microsoft jT47lg
    Just tell her to knock it off with the white boy stuff. If she won’t stop report it.
    Jul 7 0
  • Amazon Tryin2Help
    No, write an email, just facts, no judgement to your manager and 1-up. If no action within a week, involve HRBP
    Jul 7 0
  • Goldman Sachs faith91
    At this point, she doesn’t even realize that you mind the way she talks. It’s better that you make it clear to her.

    Why don’t you just tell her something like: ‘Hey! I don’t like your tone. I would appreciate if you are more careful about the way you talk!’

    And if she still continues after that, then you can think of other ways to deal with it!
    Jul 7 0
  • New dBBO43
    Next time tell her to STFU with a couple of the other people she offended
    Jul 7 0
  • New / Product
    sudomeme

    New Product

    PRE
    Walmart
    sudomememore
    Report all incidents to your manager in your 1:1s. Chances are that this person’s behavior has been documented by others. This happened to me at my current company 3x, and the offender was fired a month after the third strike. HR takes documentation of discrimination against protected classes seriously.
    Jul 8 0
  • New / Eng Betal
    It's important to correct bad behavior. Just have a conversation with her: "I know that you mean well but I find that this borders on racism. I want to understand why you think it is okay to talk like this". Put her in a position where she has to explain herself. She will likely defend her behavior in that conversation but will likely cut out the bad behavior in future.
    Jul 8 0
  • New / Strategy
    gandalfhan

    New Strategy

    PRE
    Oracle
    gandalfhanmore
    Some people have social anxiety and use these kind of jokes to fit in. I think talking to her and just saying that some people would take her comments offensively may be a good start without having to go thru the whole hr drama...its a pain in the butt to complain to hr...try talking to her first
    Jul 7 0