So I have a crush at this girl at work..

Google iksjkdh
Apr 7 64 Comments

Not same team. Both of us are same levels so do not report to each other obv. We are still in same building.

Whenever we meet, we exchange smiles or small talk like “Hello” etc. (Sounds funny/pathetic saying this lol). Anyways I’m not good socially.

I did some research and appears she has no bf. (from social media).

I just felt like sharing this, I don’t want to make anyone feel uncomfortable and will immediately back off if I feel she is uncomfortable. Probably I’m too shy to say anything anyways.

I’m also worried it might affect my work. Thoughts?

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TOP 64 Comments
  • Bayer macys
    “I did some research” == “I stalked the shit out of her socials”
    Apr 7 19
    • Google iksjkdh
      OP
      What do you mean lol
      Apr 7
    • Uber
      2muchblind

      Uber

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      Apple, Microsoft
      2muchblindmore
      There are few absolutes in life @Oath, we need to take things on a case by case basis.
      Apr 7
    • Oath / Mgmt Atinlay2
      I agree, but trying to date co-workers is a bad idea.
      Apr 7
    • Uber
      2muchblind

      Uber

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      Apple, Microsoft
      2muchblindmore
      From OPs other posts, they’re in different orgs and aren’t really co-workers in that sense. Just have passing interactions, that’s all.

      Yeah I mean trying to date someone you have to work with on a daily basis could end up badly and that would result in one of you switching teams. Or getting fired if one of you or both is crazy. (But if it works out then great! Lol)
      Apr 7
    • Oath / Mgmt Atinlay2
      It’s still a bad idea
      Apr 7
  • Cisco tutus
    You can get job at any company anytime! If you don’t put enough courage you might miss out the true partner in life! Anyways what’s fun in achievement without some distractions 😎
    Apr 7 1
    • New XNCU73
      Jeff Bezos would like to have a word with you
      Apr 7
  • Facebook shamrock
    I’m in the exact same position. I learned from a mutual friend that she’s seeing someone, but I’m much hotter (plus I work at FB), so I still got a chance. Have to tread carefully but I’m optimistic.
    Apr 7 4
    • New NotNew
      "much hotter" lol blind
      Apr 7
    • Facebook Probe
      🤮
      Apr 7
    • Qualcomm dynasty001
      I like your confidence. Go get her tiger!
      Apr 7
    • Expedia Ytdj51
      Much hotter...i think you mean, I think I look better. That would imply you think the bf is hot.
      Apr 7
  • Amazon bunda
    Imo the problem is not asking someone out, is how you'll react afterwards if they reject.
    Only ask her if you are 100% sure you can keep a professional relationship after a "no" - remember that's a person that will see you again basically every day, not a random stranger on a party.
    Apr 7 6
    • Oracle nBeN41
      Finding a common coworker as a wingman might help. Try to see if you can meet casually outside work in a group environment
      Apr 7
    • Amazon bunda
      I guess I'm on a stage of my life (>30 years old) where my thoughts are more direct - if you want to go out with someone, ask them out don't play around, just be mature about it if it's not mutual... age is probably a factor on what's the right thing to do here, just don't waste too much time wondering, life's way too short.
      Full disclosure: I'm not on the dating game since 10 years ago, just thinking about what I'd do in the same situation
      Apr 7
    • Facebook shamrock
      Great points, Amazon.
      I’d say playing around is fun :)
      Apr 7
    • Microsoft / Other
      Scads

      Microsoft Other

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      Scadsmore
      Ask her if she knows python 🐍...
      Apr 7
    • Expedia Ytdj51
      Ya, that will work great
      Apr 7
  • Oracle not_larry
    What’s wrong with you? Swipe right until you fine the One
    Apr 7 4
    • Google PhGz62
      How do you know she’s on the app?
      Apr 7
    • Expedia Ytdj51
      Didn’t you read the post? She smiles at him! She wouldn’t do that unless she was head over heels /s
      Apr 7
    • Google PhGz62
      Plenty of women smile at me in my office. I’m pretty sure less than one % of them are romantically interested in me
      Apr 7
    • Expedia Ytdj51
      Ya, was obviously not being serious hence, “/s”lol
      Apr 7
  • Google PhGz62
    Usually, if someone likes you it’s kinda easy to tell. Are you getting the vibe?

    Have you tried asking to join her for lunch/dinner/breakfast? (It’s free and in the building so relatively risk free :P)
    Apr 7 5
    • Google iksjkdh
      OP
      I don’t know. We had very little talks. Smiling/greeting someone is just common courtesy I guess. She is not in my team/org and we don’t interact on work so this will come off as “too weird” for now.
      Apr 7
    • Google PhGz62
      How did you meet then?

      Find some common things / excuses to talk to her. Otherwise nothing is gonna change. Unless, that’s your goal? Waiting for the crush to die down?
      Apr 7
    • Google iksjkdh
      OP
      We both attend some weekly event like 1-2 times a week but it is not a place to socialize. She initially dropped “Hi/Hello” when she saw me later I guess since I’m the only SWE (like her) who does. Then it grow to a common practice when we run into each other. I want tbh but hesitant. I’m not good socially too.
      Apr 7
    • Uber
      2muchblind

      Uber

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      2muchblindmore
      Ok, this is a little sneaky but find out more about the project she’s working on. Say you want to know more about it. That can be your excuse for a lunch.

      Make it genuine though — be curious about her project. But keep in mind she may not be interested in you (or may be dating someone else she likes), so be mentally prepared for whatever outcome.
      Apr 7
    • Google PhGz62
      If she’s a SWE, there are tons of things to talk about!!! Like what you talk about with you teammates, do the same. Bring questions. Imagine she’s one of your teammates and talk to her the same way.

      As for finding out her relationship status, I will give you a tip which I learned from someone else ;) I asked my crush about a company event which let you bring +1. Something along the line of “Have you heard of X event? Do you think it’s weird to bring +1? Do people bring +1?” Then she told me she didn’t have +1 but wouldn’t think it’d be weird for people to do that. (Obviously I took the opportunity to say I didn’t have +1 either but was just wondering)
      Apr 7
  • Groupon MNri40
    You can invite her out for some coffee, if she rejects you then move on
    Apr 7 1
    • Facebook shamrock
      This will only succeed if the girl already reciprocates the crush

      If the girl is not yet bought into OP’s charm, then OP should do normal friend stuff prior to dating.
      Apr 7
  • Honeywell / Eng that1guy
    Step 1) Socialize. Find times to talk to her beyond hello. Hell, even say how crazy the weather is. It doesn’t matter, get to talking and do it often.

    Step 2) Move convo outside of work. With step 1 you should start feeling if she’s into you. Does she find you out to talk often? Does she avoid you? If it seems positive then drop hints like “do you know any good <places that she’s previously talked about enjoying>”

    Step 3) Casually ask if she wants to come with you to previously discussed outside location
    Apr 7 0
  • Amazon / Eng neighbormo
    Some people are cagey about having an SO on social media. There’s no way to tell (as far as I know at least...)

    Better to not risk it because most people are attached these days anyway
    Apr 7 6
    • SAP / Product blind811
      Nah, talk to her. Find a way and you'll know from her. You don't have to appear invasive, I'm sure you're resourceful and will find a way to know.
      Apr 7
    • Google iksjkdh
      OP
      I’m not good socially tbh. Feel I will fuk it up or come as awkward
      Apr 7
    • Amazon / Eng neighbormo
      I’m surprised you’re like this. I always assumed people at Google we’re all just hot and well adjusted. Being awkward is an Amazon thing
      Apr 7
    • Expedia Ytdj51
      That’s a /s right?
      Apr 7
    • Amazon / Eng neighbormo
      No? Everyone I know at Google is basically a super human.
      Apr 7
  • Oscar 🐨koala
    Advice: small talks are good but you need more better causal talk. Get a team eat or something. Break the ice.
    Apr 7 5
    • Microsoft / Other
      Scads

      Microsoft Other

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      Scadsmore
      Ask her if she likes pythons.
      Apr 7
    • Oscar 🐨koala
      I program in Python.
      Apr 7
    • Uber
      2muchblind

      Uber

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      2muchblindmore
      +1 on the team eat. Just something really safe and easy to back out of, for you to chat. And be on the lookout for clear hints indicating she’s not interested.
      Apr 7
    • Expedia Ytdj51
      You better be programming on Python 9.5 if you catch my drift
      Apr 7
    • Microsoft / Other
      Scads

      Microsoft Other

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      Uber, Netflix, Amazon, Google, Facebook
      Scadsmore
      Be sure to buff her overflow
      Apr 7
  • Oracle xPNo42
    Oh yeah dude, she likes you
    https://us.teamblind.com/s/Fidc4C1i
    Apr 7 1
    • Dropbox systest
      That post has 2 people of the same team
      Apr 7
  • Oracle nBeN41
    My father was my mother’s manager. They are still together. That was early 70’s, where dating someone at work was not even more common but a common social practice
    Apr 7 0