I hear a lot that house work and taking care of a child is a real work and is unpaid and it is unfair that women have to do it. I can totally empathise with it, I would feel horrible if I had to do all of this stuff. Hence I never ask my wife to do the house work, and totally don't want to burden her with taking care of the child. However, surprising thing is, she still chooses to cook, and it induces some guilt trip for me, like now I am supposed to at least help her wash the dishes to avoid being unfair. I hate washing dishes however, and I don't really need home-made dinner, we could always just order some takeaway. Furthermore, now she wants a child. This is a real cognitive dissonance: after all those stories of how women suffer and sacrifice their careers to take care of the child, and it is men's fault that they force women into that unpaid work, I'm seeing that a woman voluntarily walks into this trap. I would prefer her to focus on studies and career thank you very much. It seems scary and doesn't make sense that a woman wants something and asks me for that, and at the same time I hear that it is an unpaid work, and I will be blamed for "making" my wife do that unpaid work. So, is it a unique case or many/most women want to have a child more than their husbands (for this analysis let's assume hetero binary families)? If having a child is an unpaid work, why would women voluntarily choose to do so? If it is actually a rewarding project that compensates for all the work, then why is it called unpaid work? Can I claim my pet project that I do at nights as unpaid work? It is work and it is unpaid. Can I use it to calculate my effective pay per hour? Can I take a paid leave to do it? P.S. - this post is not entirely serious, please assume good intent
Human kind would have died off long ago if there weren’t benefits to having kids. Yes, there is a lot of work especially when the kids are young but it gets easier as they grow up and, if you raise them right, they will pay for your swanky retirement community when you get old enough.
I think it’s mostly FOMO that motivates a person to have a child. And the biological clock doesn’t help either. I am a woman, but I really don’t want to have a child.
Found the Indian
How do you know OP is Indian?
Trust me. Wait for it. In the meantime read this one: Check out this post! "What is the best way to handle money in a marriage (Relationships)" https://us.teamblind.com/s/DFGax08o
Did your parents ask?
I still cook almost every day and hate the the cleanup afterwards. But I do that because there’s no choice - subsisting on a diet of takeout food is a step to an early grave and I can tell you that from experience. The difference became clear once we started eating at home mostly. Maybe we both have food sensitivities but we’ve had virtually similar and peculiar symptoms for yearsbefore we met and realized it was diet related only after cooking at home for a long time.
You have to pay for your relationship
You should have just stated you don't want kids before marrying her.
You sound like you grew up without having to do any chores. It’s not that hard to load a dishwasher.
Skip the BS, you don’t want a child.
I don't at the moment indeed. I'm trying to understand why/whether women generally want a child.
So you already understand all other things about women?