My friend keeps referring to himself as "big brother" to me all of a sudden. Started to bother me a lot, firstly because it indicates i am weak in some way/need protection, shifting the power into his corner, and also because we've been pretty flirty with each other and this is like friend-zoning me permanently. How to react gracefully to this so he'd stop with this big brother reference, it's annoying, and also save face as i am disappointed with things not going anywhere with us?
Call him little brother and treat him like one
Watch NatGeo. Mount him. Show dominance.
You and me baby aināt nothing but mammals, so letās do it like they do on the discovery channel.
He knows you're into him and is letting you down gently.
Very likely, yes. He also says all sorts of things to me to get strong reactions out of me, so i have hard time looking at this one as sth else than a provocation. But if he knows i am into him, how to respond to this in a "cool" way?
If you like him Iād say test that boundary by using reverse psychology. The next time he flirts or for instance hugs you say āwoah woah buddy, slow down, hands off. You know I like you but only as my big brother.ā Smile in an ambiguous/knowing/flirtatious way and walk away. Keep doing this from time to time to mock his big brother joke. If he looks disappointed with your fake boundaries then he likely likes you too. People hate to be told they canāt do something so heāll likely break his own ābrotherā boundary by flirting even more with you and heāll stop saying heās your brother. If he doesnāt look disappointed with your āhands off, I donāt like you like thatā joke then he likely is just a friend so why not say āIād rather have a friend than a brother. Iām glad you think of me that way though.ā If heās a good guy heāll stop saying heās your brother at that point.
Punish this big brother badddly
This totally depends on the cultural context. If these conversations are in Korean, heās flirting back with you and wants to give you the D. If Chinese, heās soft rejecting you. If English, 2+2=5.
American
This person probably discovered that he loves you but not romantically. I have a number of close female friends who are like younger sisters to me. Iām happily married and usually a decade older than they are, but we either have a lot in common, have similar values, had similar family dynamics when we were younger, some insanely strong connection, etc. Some of us guys use it instead of the āfriend zoneā because we really like you a lot and want to have you in our livesāas more than a friend but not a romantic partner. I also make time for these people no matter what is going on: deadlines, personal stuff, etc. I had a dysfunctional family growing up, so Iām building one. I have a great wife and kids in addition to friends who are like family to me.
Start referring to him as your little sister.
Tech Industry
2d
2889
300k fully remote vs 450k 3x RTO, which would you choose?
Tech Industry
2d
53652
Goog Employees Arrested
Tech Industry
Yesterday
586
Chances of meta clearing E5 with screwing up one coding one round and acing all other
Tech Industry
Yesterday
1187
RIP Lacework
Layoffs
2d
41483
Google CFO confirms 'large-scale' layoffs (Apr 17)
You gotta talk sense into Big Brother Gotta make him feel like thereās no other Gotta believe that you two together is the best If things donāt improve, just go for it; think of it as incest
Lol