WTH Moment off dating app

Google / Eng hdjskfhe
May 21 41 Comments

Two days ago, ended up on a phone call with a Tinder match. One of the best conversations I've had with someone in a long time. Made plans to grab drinks yesterday.

Yesterday could not get in contact with them, they unmatched me on Tinder and seem to have blocked my phone number.

I'm kinda dumbfounded nothing between a one hour phone call that went really well and suddenly being distanced with no communication whatsoever. Kinda rattling to go from really excited about a date to completely blocked with no explanation.

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TOP 41 Comments
  • New / Design love&life
    I could only guess person was in a relationship and/or was married. Or maybe person was caught on app.
    May 21 3
    • Google / Eng hdjskfhe
      OP
      Probably a good call. Don't want to mess with that.

      Realistically I'm saving myself some headaches here but sometimes it doesn't feel like that.
      May 21
    • New / Design love&life
      Good call if you wanted a relationship too.

      Missed call on some adventure!
      May 21
    • Google / Eng hdjskfhe
      OP
      Hahaha fair enough, I don't want to be a wrecking ball for people's other relationships.

      Not necessarily looking for one myself but I dislike drama
      May 21
  • Intel / Eng onerhief
    You got ghosted. Move on to the next.
    May 21 4
    • New / Design love&life
      Yup move on next. OP sounds like you don’t date enough that’s why you post this.
      May 21
    • Google / Eng hdjskfhe
      OP
      Admittedly haven't dated much, it was bizarre that a) she wanted to call b)setup the time to meetup and then c) didn't just stop responding but blocked me (with imessage when you block people messages stop getting delivered)
      May 21
    • New / Design love&life
      Yeahhhh so she’s definitely seeing someone else. You were close OP!

      In life, many times it’s just timing man.
      May 21
    • New
      ͏

      New

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      Good to know about the iMessage thing, I’ll keep that factoid around in my mind for a while
      May 21
  • It’s tinder. Normal behavior for most people there.
    May 21 0
  • Amazon sftrefghj
    That is why you don’t date recruiters
    May 21 1
    • Microsoft / R&D ^^^
      This ^^^
      May 21
  • Verizon Media sxSG85
    Don’t take it personally but know that it was absolutely personal. Move on. People take off their decency mask on dating apps
    May 21 0
  • Deloitte broadway74
    Obviously they felt different about the call
    May 21 1
    • Google / Eng hdjskfhe
      OP
      I mean it was her idea on the call to meet up? I agree with everyone about moving on though
      May 21
  • New OzFSE
    The thing about dating is you have to remember people are dating several people at one time. Your call may have gone great but some other candidate already further along in the dating process may have moved into a position that sealed the deal.
    May 21 0
  • Oracle / Eng such!slife
    Adults not being adults. Why does anyone ghost after initiating conversation?
    May 21 2
    • Google / Eng hdjskfhe
      OP
      I kinda agree, generally if you initiate making plans and then want to back out you should just say something. Anything from 'between last night and this morning I found someone better' 'im married sorry' 'i just am not ready to actually date' would be better...

      But dating apps and human decency. I adjusted my day for our date and was excited for it, least anyone in that situation deserves is a heads up.
      May 21
    • Oracle / Eng such!slife
      Sorry OP. Don't lose heart. You dodged a bullet.
      She didn't have basic human decency to say she didn't want to take this further. You don't want to be dating someone like that!
      May 21
  • Microsoft / R&D ^^^
    Was it Shelly? I was ghosted in a similar manner :)
    May 21 1
  • Google USApotato
    Age and location?
    May 21 6
    • Facebook d00ng3r
      In Boulder? You were probably not white enough for her. You gotta go full on Mayo spread on crackers for that.
      May 21
    • Google / Eng hdjskfhe
      OP
      🤣, admittedly I'm super white like the rest of people here.... It's a problem
      May 21
    • Oracle pzd
      Only a white man can say being white is a problem 😂 the rest of humanity begs to differ.
      May 21
    • Google / Eng hdjskfhe
      OP
      Haha being white not a problem, Boulder having no diversity is.
      May 21
    • Google USApotato
      If it makes you feel better, the tables will turn when you turn ~35 😘
      May 21
  • SAP Tuesed
    Ghosting is a common thing these days unfortunately. Happened to me last week despite everything suggesting things were going good. It sucks, but it is what it is.
    May 21 1
    • Google / Eng hdjskfhe
      OP
      Yeah the ghosting is normal this was above and beyond my previous experiences though.
      May 21
  • The reality is that she found someone better on the app. I have a long experience of online dating and some good successes. People are vile when dating and they are always looking for an upgraded match opportunity, and will completely forget about that conversation if someone hotter comes along. No other explanation basically.

    I’ve probably been ghosted hundreds of times, at some point you don’t care anymore and you start seeing each dating candidate as a commodity, and that’s when you start getting some great successes because you start hitting everyone rather than focusing on one person thinking how well it went. I’ve had close to 50 different dates, many of those led to escalation. When you find someone you like after several consecutive dates, you can then start focusing more on them. That’s how I found my current girlfriend.
    May 21 0
  • Amazon LnzB25
    I'm with OP here. I just don't understand this. If this person was married/committed then why bother setting up a meet or even suggesting a meet. If not, then seriously what changes in 24 hours even if you've been talking to multiple people ??!!!
    This though is highly possible - person going through break-up or separation, wants to be sure they still have their mojo before they break it off permanently. Thoughts?
    Jun 9 2
    • New bricked
      I think you are way overthinking this. I have a lot of experience online dating (found my long term gf after dating about 30 women and thousands of swipes) and 99.9% is that they found someone better looking or more engaging than op. The rule of thumb is: until you meet face to face, you are just a replaceable commodity in the eye of a good looking woman with hundreds of constant matches. And even after f2f, you can still be ghosted easily for the first few times. I’ve even been ghosted after having had sex with the woman, multiple times in one night and she slept over at my place!

      The sooner you realize this, the better you’ll play the game at your advantage.
      Jun 9
    • Amazon LnzB25
      I guess you are probably right.
      Jun 9
  • New / Eng
    trebek

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    trebekmore
    Either they deleted the app for [insert reason here] or they were on there looking for something casual and didn’t find you attractive
    May 28 1
    • New / Eng |l|l||l|l|
      Then why would they swipe right with OP and engage them in the first place?
      May 28
  • Yahoo OhFuck!
    Chill bro. It's a reflection on them, not you.
    But, Make sure, you don't ghost girls you don't connect with, after few text exchanges. It's good to let them know :)
    May 21 1
  • Oracle iOFR21
    You cant judge humans.
    May 21 0
  • New / Eng |l|l||l|l|
    Name and shame
    May 21 0
  • New hqWe60
    she found someone better on the app
    May 21 0