What am I to do with snowflakes?

I personally think you should quit before it consumes you. Unless you're able to complete just work and not be affected it's not worth putting any energy towards their behavior...

I’m also a female in tech. One of my struggles is my eyes well up when I’m frustrated or passionate about something (Also, yes getting feedback). I’m not trying to be emotional—I’ve tried breathing tricks, meditation, etc and still happens. If any of your coworkers are like that, the best move is just to ignore it and keep going (I can usually control it in 30 seconds if no one makes me self conscious of it) or give them a couple minutes to regain composure/think it through/calm down. Cattiness, on the other hand, I can’t help you with. That’s their problem.

Wow that sounds exhausting. As a fellow woman in engineering I literally cannot stand neverending recurring conversations about whose feelings were hurt and why. (Short ones are fine! Sometimes people got to talk things out - yes, men too. In all fairness, I have also encountered my fair share of whiny men ;) ). I'm lucky enough that this practically doesn't happen in my org at all - we don't have lots of women but the ones we do have are total badasses who are AWESOME at their job. You sound like one of these. Rock on, sister.

Do you have examples of people not listening to your advice? It could be just some of the women you work with since you get along with others, but maybe it's you? Maybe try to relate more. For example, you probably don't want to be calling people snowflakes because they might be more sensitive or empathatic than you.

Almost sounds like you're forced to sit through these conversations. You want to still hang, but don't like the topic staying on feelings too much?

After school I have gotten the chance to work full time in my field for 10 years. 5 out those 10 were working for a female boss (several, actually). No different than a male boss. All were truly decent people but I have heard things from female coworkers: 1.) They hate working for another woman 2.) Male bosses / customers are so much nicer to them 3.) They are more stressed out in a mostly/all female environment

Women are sexist too. Women also discriminate against women. Just because you are female, it doesn't mean you are not sexist. I had a female manager who was like the alpha male type and was extremely sexist, but she didn't recognize and couldn't hear it from me or another girl in our team. She might think I was a snowflake because I was so shocked to see how she treated a girl in the team during a team meeting, and I cried. It was another male coworker called her out. Anyway... you can label me a snowflake, but I'm very happy with my current female manager, who is a great and considerate manager, and I never had any "breakdown" again. So, from my personal experience and your description, i don't have enough context to suggest anything. Just want to point out that it might be how you deliver the "feedback" or "experience".

Why not just ignore them??

I had to post this in my office once. For fellow men. They got the message. https://www.brainyquote.com/authors/eleanor_roosevelt.. "small minds discuss people" etc

You are blurring multiple issues. Not all sensitive people - or sensitive women - talk badly about others behind their back or are catty. They just don't talk about their feelings at work, cry in private, and are kind to other women. So, this is easy. #1 Stop spending non-working time chatting with people who annoy you. Keep it about work. #2 Stop using your experiences with annoying catty women to label all sensitive personalities. It will not help your career to exclude those people from your stratosphere of people you respect.