Relationships

What is the best dating advice youve received ?

Qualcomm / Engdynasty001
7d

Seeing how difficult it is to meet womeb being in the tech industry, what is the best advice youve received in regards to meeting men/women for dating?

One of my friends said “get her number within 2 days of meeting her . Else move on. Dont stretch the timeline”

Any such nuggets of gold?

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  • Google / Eng
    prodaccess

    GoogleEng

    BIO
    Top Contributor or GTFO
    prodaccessmore
    Be taller.
    7d5
    • New / EngTTNT
      * Have better values
      7d
    • Google / Eng
      prodaccess

      GoogleEng

      BIO
      Top Contributor or GTFO
      prodaccessmore
      Try that with the girls that ignore you for your height and report back here.
      7d
    • New / EngTTNT
      Girls smell self pity from miles away. It’s not your height, it’s your self pity and low confidence.

      I am bald. For a year after becoming bald I didn’t have a single girl looking at me, before that I had quite easy time finding girls.

      I thought “This is my life now”. Then I changed my values and I date hotter girls than I ever have before.

      Read the book or check it out on Audible: MODELS: Attract Women Through Honesty.
      7d
    • New / EngTTNT
      I’m not going to deny that it’s a bit harder... But a lot of girls really don’t care that much if you have other qualities.
      7d
    • Google / Eng
      prodaccess

      GoogleEng

      BIO
      Top Contributor or GTFO
      prodaccessmore
      I'm 6"1, btw.
      7d
  • EagleView Technologies / R&D
    klokov

    EagleView TechnologiesR&D

    BIO
    C++17 greater than the rest
    klokovmore
    I am an Indian male, a lot of folks would've said right there "You're Indian, you're screwed"(a hearty fuck you to all of you!) . I do pretty well in dating apps in a small city(Rochester), with 95% of my matches being white women including some who answer "Yes" to "Would you strictly date someone of your own skin color" on OkCupid.

    Here's what I do -

    1) Be in shape, have interesting hobbies especially if you're not a white dude. I am a competitive weightlifter, women take a lot of interest about that and ask me how I got into it.

    2) Be funny - Your first message especially on Tinder is make it or break it. My thumb rule - If the women is 21-25 go for a cheesy pick up line or joke(/r/tinder and r/jokes are full of them, I modify and use them). If between 25-30 then do the same or something based on her profile if it is decent. Over 30, then message something meaningful, they hate cheesy pick up lines. American women love it if a guy can make them laugh, fortunately watching too much House and Scrubs rubbed off on my sense of humor.

    3) Set a date and take the conversation offline within 15-20 messages. This may not work on most introverted women, in that case apologize, talk more and then ask out. Either ask directly or lead into indirectly(eg: Hey I heard of this great pizza place, wanna try it out?), shows that you've a spine.

    4) Take an interest in what they say, you must be able to fake sincerity if needed. Women love men who are great listeners, it's not all about your life, your hobbies, it's about their life, their hobbies.

    5) Be chilled out, women seem to like that too. A lot of their dates are with total douches who happen to be clingy, don't be clingy, it's like a breath of fresh air for them.

    I guess that's it for now.
    7d6
    • Sony / EngImTheBest
      No one is looking for actual advice, just memes. Wasn't that obvious?
      7d
    • EagleView Technologies / R&D
      klokov

      EagleView TechnologiesR&D

      BIO
      C++17 greater than the rest
      klokovmore
      They can go to /r/OkCupid then, that whole place is a meme dump
      7d
    • Qualcomm / Engdynasty001
      OP
      Wow. Thank you good sir!
      7d
    • EagleView Technologies / R&D
      klokov

      EagleView TechnologiesR&D

      BIO
      C++17 greater than the rest
      klokovmore
      You’re welcome! Happy to help!
      7d
    • Booking.com b.urn
      I have a tremendous hard time imagining you being funny...
      7d
    • Micro Focus / Eng5’6” Ruski
      Wait until you’ve been dating for a few years, then your girlfriend will complain about you being in the gym all the time.
      7d
  • Groupon beewax
    Go for masters degree and hang out with undergrads
    7d0
  • Spotify WizzAir
    Move to NYC, get a wife, then move out.
    7d0
  • Google DWaU03
    Change industry, learn how to talk to a human being vs typing on a keyboard
    7d4
    • Qualcomm / Engdynasty001
      OP
      Gotta chase that tech salary bro
      7d
    • Google
      dyyyu

      Google

      PRE
      Amazon
      dyyyumore
      Lol, at Qualcomm?
      7d
    • Amazon / Engdh3n4n6brb
      Haha buurrrrrnnn
      7d
    • Qualcomm / Engdynasty001
      OP
      Thats true :-( qualcomm pays decent for san diego.
      7d
  • Cruise Automation mocca
    If you're online dating, goal is to move offline and get her number asap. Conversations drag online and people don't commit to anything. Within the first few messages ask them out on a date, you'll see how committed they are to actually dating than just chatting online.
    7d1
    • Qualcomm / Engdynasty001
      OP
      Yup. I exactly did this and got 2 dates. That was a while back
      7d
  • Capital One / Dataflap
    "They're all pretty much the same. Pick one and get married."
    7d0
  • Cruise Automation mocca
    Population density matters. If dating is the goal in places like the bay area where gender ratios are skewed. You need to increase absolute numbers. And people are lazy to travel to date someone new. World of difference between SF dating pool and the valley. Unless of course you go out often and approach in person.

    So two lessons here. Proximity and density matters a lot. Approaching in person more effective than online.
    7d4
    • Qualcomm / Engdynasty001
      OP
      So SF has a much better dating scene that say san jose /cupertino/mtv/menlo park and the likes?
      7d
    • Google usurper
      I'd think it's the opposite. When I first joined Tinder, I was like "wow, there's so many hot chicks on here!" Then I realized my location was set to San Jose. Changed it to SF and got the usual batch of frumpy hipsters. 😢
      7d
    • Cruise Automation mocca
      Much better. World of difference. If asked to quantify for a person doing online dating in their twenties, 5x-10x better. Why such a big difference? it's because the frequency of dates more than doubles, the confidence of being able to get dates skyrockets. And beginning success leads to a person trying more and continuing the dating process instead of giving up and complaining about how either no one finds them attractive, or the opposite sex being too picky.
      7d
    • Cruise Automation mocca
      @usurper, we had opposite experiences. What is your age range target? Mine was in 20s.
      7d
  • Facebook aNww73
    Never invest more than she is investing in the relationship
    7d1
  • Amazon / EngAm A Bot
    Your title says dating advice but the description is about meeting women. I’ll offer both.

    My best advice for meeting women: choose activities where the odds are in your favor. When I was dating I took ballroom dance classes and the ratio was 3 women to 1 man, and the ones who didn’t bring a partner were mostly single and easy to identify (they rotated partners to take turns out of fairness). On some weeknights the ratio was as high as 6:1.

    The best relationship advice I ever received came from my wife when we were dating: always fight fair. If you only fight about the issue and don’t bring any others into it, your fights will never escalate unless you royally screw up (in which case you deserve it). Fighting fair means avoiding absolutes like “never” or “always,” and not talking about feelings as facts (“I feel that you don’t care” is not the same as the accusation “you don’t care”), though how you feel is just as real as facts.
    7d0
  • Google / OpsDrone888
    Don't shit where you eat!!
    7d2
    • Google speed_race
      Can he eat where he shits though?
      7d
    • LeanTaaS ♥️ data
      Speedy...he can but once he shits, he cannot eat again at the same place...
      7d
  • Apple / Eng
    OxKing

    AppleEng

    BIO
    Strong and built like an Ox
    OxKingmore
    “No woman’s p**** is made out of gold” ~ My mother
    5d0
  • Microsoft ejck25
    Be upfront in your expectations of dating and ultra blunt. Tell her you don't want to be friends. Don't play around with wording here. If she's interested she'll accept it and you can see where things go without worrying about friendzone. If not, then you can move on without getting too attached.
    7d2
    • Qualcomm / Engdynasty001
      OP
      Yup. I am gonna do that . Last time i got too attached to one and it was a whole pile of shit
      7d
    • Tumblr Olajuwo
      This is the worst advice ever and the problem with/stemmed from online dating.
      7d
  • LeanTaaS ♥️ data
    If you have bad looks or you are fat or not attractive and you know that and still a hot person is dating you.... Mostly money is involved...those relationship does not go very far
    7d2
    • Spotify WizzAir
      Trump is still married though
      7d
    • LeanTaaS ♥️ data
      That's the point.. he is Trump..we are not
      7d
  • Tumblr Olajuwo
    Get to know people genuinely as people instead of trying so hard to find a relationship.
    7d0
  • Facebook B13captain
    Hit the lawyer, gym Facebook, delete up
    7d3
    • Spotify WizzAir
      Can you explain hit the lawyer part? I dont get it.
      7d
    • Qualcomm / Engdynasty001
      OP
      He is being sarcastic. Its a famous reddit thingy. Goes like : delete facebook, hit the gym, lawyer up (in anticipation of a divorce)
      7d
    • Spotify WizzAir
      Dang. that's sad.
      7d
  • Intel xBoE15
    Attend profession meetup groups. I met my long term girlfriend at my company's young employees group. Lots of cute Indian and Chinese women at those if your open minded to dating foreigners. Also when you meet someone at an event, try to find one activity you both enjoy like a hobby and invite them to meet up and do that. After you hang out with them 1o1 at least once, then you should aks them to do something more romantic like see a show or get drinks somewhere
    7d3
    • Qualcomm / Engdynasty001
      OP
      I am open to dating foreigners. My first date here was a chinese !

      Where do i find profession meetup groups? Meetup.com?
      7d
    • Google usurper
      Picking up people at professional events doesn't sound very professional...
      7d
    • Snapchat +1s
      I thought these so-called professional meetup groups are mostly about looking for potential dates
      7d
  • Apple Ni hao
    How to get out of being too attached ?
    7d2
    • Facebook aNww73
      Just posted this separately, but never invest more than she is investing in the relationship
      7d
    • Qualcomm / Engdynasty001
      OP
      @apple. Been there my friend. I am moving on slowly. Doing LeetCode helps as it helps your mind focus on sth else. Workout as well. As you start looking better, your confidence will give you the will to move on. There are lots of people who will like you..
      are you chinese? I was too attached to a chinese girl .. :-(
      7d
  • Facebook J0hnD0e
    You should have added Tinder in the company tags
    Who know maybe they give us some internal advice
    7d0
  • Facebook cynicale5
    "Don't screw the crew."
    7d0

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