What is your biggest fear?

NetApp jrguvfg
Jul 3 600 Comments

As per title

Mine is losing my parents. I try to talk to them daily and spend as much time as I can. I am on Visa so generally I meet them just once a year when I visit them or they come to visit me.

These days I get anxious a lot and call them immediately even if it’s odd time(different time zones) partly because recently I saw my BF suffering from his Dad’s loss.

Is it normal?

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TOP 600 Comments
  • Amazon redocteel
    Getting PIP’d.
    Jul 3 4
    • LinkedIn boringdude
      Lol are people serious about this?
      I wouldn’t bat an eyelid over it! I mean it is trivial to find a decent swe job, if not the perfect job.
      Jul 3
    • Facebook digb38hgy
      Trust me, it is not the end of the world and there is life outside of Amazon or work in general. If you don't get it now, you will get it later.
      Jul 4
    • New / Design
      510Headset

      New Design

      PRE
      Xero
      BIO
      I design VR experiences, mobile apps, and motion.
      510Headsetmore
      I just want to say that i actually got PIP’ed earlier this year. I’m not an SWE, and it was very difficult, both for me and my manager (we get on well personally but we couldn’t make it work in the team).
      And yet... it’s okay. Life goes on, and there are lots of other jobs out there. I did some work to figure out where I went wrong, and gave myself credit for what i did right. So: yes, getting PIP’ed can be rough. But it’s not the end of the world.
      Jul 4
    • Target / Eng
      JJEK87

      Target Eng

      BIO
      🐼
      JJEK87more
      TC or GTFO
      Jul 4
  • Zillow Group ^H
    Albertsons onsite
    Jul 3 2
    • Amazon imdbeed
      Hell even a phone screen
      Jul 4
    • New s-works
      email screens from the big A are anxiety provoking
      Jul 4
  • Facebook cuck
    Dying
    Jul 3 10
    • United Airlines / IT
      jky

      United Airlines IT

      PRE
      Weatherford International
      jkymore
      Just make sure that even if they prescribe medication, they work on how you deal with the anxiety as well.
      Jul 4
    • Twitter / Eng
      huyf02

      Twitter Eng

      PRE
      PayPal
      huyf02more
      Yes. Make sure to go to a therapist who deals with anxiety and cognitive behavioral therapy. Books like Brainlock and Anxiety workbook can also be helpful.
      Jul 4
    • Amazon / Eng
      hofhfudbs

      Amazon Eng

      PRE
      Microsoft
      hofhfudbsmore
      Therapist + CBD.

      Also I think having “some” anxiety or fear towards death is just human.
      Jul 4
    • Google / Product PiGuy
      Read “when panic attacks”
      Jul 4
    • BBDO sxYo02
      I'm with this guy. Not existing just seems so much worse than existing.
      4d
  • Workday Flounder
    Democrats winning in 2020.
    Jul 4 11
    • Workday Flounder
      Tax reform, the beginning of immigration reform, trade deals, pulling out of horrific g8 and on and on and on...
      Jul 4
    • Sony wWNe61
      Caging children. Pulling out of Paris climate accord, Nepotism . You missed these.
      Jul 4
    • New / Eng
      emoticon

      New Eng

      BIO
      Human being doing me an engineering
      emoticonmore
      How do you feel about nursing children being ripped from their mothers? How do you feel about losing the data to even put many families back together? Do you care?
      Jul 4
    • Sony wWNe61
      It’s hard to convince trumppets about tax reform immigration even though the data suggests they were crappy. But you have to an absolute fool to convince yourself that what he is doing to those children is reasonable to say the least.
      Jul 4
    • Google Devil
      I am Rich and beneficiary of tax cuts and don’t support tax cuts at all . Not good for us on long term. Tax cut supporters you need to peal layers of how economy works and what ever trump did with tax cuts is temp and have to be rolled back. Man why don’t you guys get it’s not about GOP or Democratic Party . It’s all about womanizer nepotistic maniac in White House .I hope all trump supporters see that some day .
      Jul 4
  • New gvt23s
    Yes that’s normal. My biggest fear is my mom getting Alzheimer’s. It happened to both her parents and was tragic. I try to visit as much as possible but there are no jobs in my home town so I can’t work there.
    Jul 3 1
    • Booking.com Ra80046wbd
      I quit my job, and moved to my hometown.

      Work would always be there for you to do. Parents won't
      Jul 4
  • Amazon prestige🧐
    Losing Top Contributor status 😱
    Jul 3 2
    • SAP
      Man

      SAP

      BIO
      F
      Manmore
      How do you lose it?
      Jul 4
    • Amazon MsSanchez
      You can’t take this away from me....
      Jul 4
  • Cerner pfdP78
    My daughter marrying a liberal.
    Jul 5 40
    • Google Devil
      Cerner at this point you have proved us rite about how we feel about trump supporters . We needed data to validate as it’s been a while and you did a fantastic job man .
      Jul 7
    • Cerner pfdP78
      *right

      ** why are you putting spaces before the period?
      Jul 7
    • Unity 7hgr0
      Ouch. That one really hurt.

      My turn : every time you think of your daughter, you will also think a little bit about me.

      Booh!
      Jul 7
    • Google Devil
      I’ll edit after I am done with your wife
      Jul 7
    • Cerner pfdP78
      I’m waiting for you to PM me.
      Jul 7
  • Nutanix / Eng cfgffgjji
    Same as yours. Any harm happening to my parents. I am very close to them and pray everyday that I hope I go before them.
    Jul 3 3
    • Amazon
      IlIlIlIl

      Amazon

      PRE
      Amazon
      IlIlIlIlmore
      This is kinda selfish. No parents should see their kids go before them
      Jul 4
    • Microsoft savagefckr
      This recently happened to a close relative. So much more devastating to see someone in their 50s lose their 30 something y/o kid then the usual death scenarios.

      Death doesn’t bother me, personally. When I think that there’s what, like 6 billion of us, I realize I’m just another ant in the farm. And it’s that attitude that really helps me enjoy the small life I have in this grand scheme :)
      Jul 4
    • Amazon thog
      Same. Chintu
      Jul 4
  • Microsoft onlythis
    Turning into the person I'm turning into.
    Jul 3 1
  • This comment was deleted by original commenter.

    • Facebook / Eng sapporro
      😭
      Jul 4
    • Microsoft birdynum
      This^
      Jul 4
    • Microsoft fjkl
      ^^ This ^^
      Jul 4
    • Amazon jQpf16
      This was mine, but met the one and he is anything but mediocre, married a year now and now losing him is my biggest fear.
      Jul 9
  • Twitter / Eng
    stupidcat

    Twitter Eng

    PRE
    JPMorgan Chase & Co., First Data Corporation, Yahoo, PlayStation
    stupidcatmore
    It used to be not being able to take care of my parents. We finally got dad to retire and enjoy life but after 6 months he was recently diagnosed with terminal stage 4 colon and liver cancer (separate). I've been seeing him suffer every day in incredible pain and all he wanted was to pass peacefully. Assisted EOL takes at least 6-8 weeks to even do so he's just suffering until then, hospice helps but it pains me to see my dad like this. Last time I was home it was during memorial day, he was still up and about happy showing no symptoms. We even made plans, he's never seen snow so I told him I'll get a Crosstrek and we can go to Tahoe often during weekends. Now none of that is possible.

    I realize you weren't asking for a sob story but I have no one to talk to about this. My dad's currently at the hospital and the doctors are keeping him sedated on continuous morphine drip to help with the pain. When he wakes up he doesn't recognize me or respond, he just looks confused, the nurses say he's not supposed to have woken up but it might be the body's last attempt to stay alive and fight the drugs.
    Jul 4 6
    • Sorry to hear that.

      In situations like these it’s better to be put out of your misery than go on living in a comprised state.

      The most compassionate and brave thing you can do for your father is taking him to an assisted suicide facility and help him transition into the next life in comfort
      Jul 4
    • Intuit tgfi
      Damn, that’s rough. The transition is rough, I get it. Just about 10 years ago you were in college and then life gets very real before you know it.

      Take care of your dad and cherish him forever buddy. 🥂
      Jul 4
    • NetApp jrguvfg
      OP
      Not a sob story...passing all the love and care to you dear friend. 🤗 hugs
      Jul 4
    • Twitter / Eng
      stupidcat

      Twitter Eng

      PRE
      JPMorgan Chase & Co., First Data Corporation, Yahoo, PlayStation
      stupidcatmore
      Thank you everyone for the warm comments. It means a lot.
      Jul 4
    • Cisco decentguy
      @Stupidcat u are my hero ... 🙏🏻
      Jul 5
  • Nvidia zVEC05
    Marrying the wrong person. Most of the women I meet are entitled, lazy, or extremely insecure. To the point it’s impossible to see raising a family with them. It makes me think I should give up, but that seems like an unsatisfying life.

    I know there are better women out there. But pretty much all the ones I meet are married.
    Jul 4 6
    • New s-works
      just take your time, it’s going to come
      Jul 4
    • Apple jKeb
      Have you tried men?
      Jul 4
    • Splunk / Eng ImaRainbow
      I dunno, men are pretty entitled / insecure too.
      Jul 4
    • The Home Depot FPQk51
      Move to Georgia. Plenty of women who would make great traditional house wives.
      Jul 5
    • Nvidia zVEC05
      Been waiting, dating different women, but I’m in my mid 30s, I’d like my oldest to graduate college before I retire.

      I’m not necessarily looking for a traditional housewife type (not opposed); mostly want to find someone who has their shit together.
      Jul 5
  • Tesla 100thievea
    Dynamic programming
    Jul 4 1
    • Schlumberger / Eng dhdhksne
      Lol same bro, same
      Jul 4
  • Facebook YxQF87
    Unlike a lot of these, I have absolutely no fear of dying, but a huge fear of dying alone. Or rather, I'd be fine dying alone, it's living alone I'm scared of.

    I turned 33 yesterday and my relationship background is not promising. Multiple "serious" exes. Enough people slept with to know it's not appearances keeping people away. Zero one-year anniversaries, tell me it's something about ME that doesn't work.

    A friend said to me once, "Some people are homes - somebody else finds them, settles down, lives in them. And some people are hostels - people come in, have a good time, remember them fondly, but nobody lives in a hostel."

    I really hope I'm not a hostel. I could easily depression spiral thinking about it but I've promised myself, I'm not going to to import worries from the future this month, I'm JUST gonna try and have a great July. I can worry about the future when it arrives.
    Jul 4 6
    • Facebook YxQF87
      Nope, male. Straight white dude.
      Jul 4
    • Ah must be a Chad then
      Jul 4
    • Indeed aurobindo
      ^You sound like a piece of work.
      Jul 4
    • Facebook YxQF87
      lol I'm 5'8" and doughey but have fun on /r/braincels

      My point is not the number, which I'll edit to delete - it's that there are great people I've somehow pushed away one way or another. How many shots on goal does one get?
      Jul 4
    • Oracle jplgrad
      I didn’t have anniversary with someone until I was 36, and I dated around plenty before then. It was worth it. Focus on making good friendships too.
      Jul 4
  • Google VMFE17
    I worry about the end of the tech gravy train. Fang or not, we got it pretty easy in tech. I’m worried we’ll all be obsolete long before we’re able to retire. Good knows how many industries tech has made obsolete, I fear our day of reckoning will come.
    Jul 4 4
    • Travelport / Eng buttnpushr
      It's not unbased. I mean look at how many meaningless acronyms and nicknames make up our work. All it takes is a paradigm shift like the printing press and most our jobs are gone
      Jul 4
    • Amazon dev0
      2002-2010 was a tech nuclear winter. Crash of the dot com, flat salaries, and then the great recession. This has been a tech renaissance since then. Going through a downturn is humbling. It’s coming but we just don’t know when and the impact. Can you insulate yourself from it? Make sure you are not in an industry where people stop spending money in a recession. Also, make sure you are a better performer than your colleagues so you are not the first to be cut in a lay-off
      Jul 4
    • GE jb897
      Also avoid lifestyle inflation, instead save your money. I still live as if I was at my salary 40k ago. I'm on track to retire at 45 if pay & savings continue the way they are.
      Jul 4
    • Microsoft TonyM
      Keep saving money.
      Jul 5
  • New cfHW53
    Killing myself! I got married to a person who is impotent and mentally unstable! On the outside he looks okay, this was an arranged marriage n I had no clue what I was getting into! Thought the family was good coz my family knew them too well that they didn’t think they would cheat in getting their mentally challenged son married! I have tried ending my life but I have to be there for my parents who had given me a fantastic life before that! My only aim now is to get these people behind bars! I want to stay alive n be strong as much as I can for my family!
    Jul 4 14
    • Facebook / Eng
      madhuridix

      Facebook Eng

      PRE
      Facebook
      madhuridixmore
      Are you single?
      Jul 5
    • The Home Depot FPQk51
      Are you Indian? Plenty of happy single reently divorced Indian women where I live in Atlanta. The shame of divorce is nothing compared to the mental health crisis you are going through.
      Jul 5
    • Booking.com / Consultant
      Punani

      Booking.com Consultant

      BIO
      🤬🤪🥴🥺🤫😜🤦‍♂️
      Punanimore
      Are those divorced women in Atlanta hot?
      Jul 5
    • Facebook / Eng
      madhuridix

      Facebook Eng

      PRE
      Facebook
      madhuridixmore
      In my bathtub
      Jul 5
    • Amazon jQpf16
      Divorce and get a good settlement. You are entitled to it. one life to live, dont consider ending it. make their lives a fucking nightmare
      Jul 9
  • Optum djt1658
    Re parents dying, this happened to me 22 years ago (I'm 64). Certainly I'm accustomed to it, but not a day goes by that I don't wish I could have said or done something with them; and now I can't. So I suggest to all of you with parents still living, consider this & don't wait to do or say those things, whatever they are. If you do, you'll have more peace of mind later.
    Jul 4 0
  • Indeed isbgu
    Dying alone

    Both in an abstract "nobody loves me and I have lived a life of solitude" sense and in a highly pragmatic "I have no roommates so if I slip in the shower or choke on my dinner, nobody can save me" sense
    Jul 4 3
    • Amazon / Eng
      Jeff B!

      Amazon Eng

      BIO
      CEO
      Jeff B!more
      That’s exactly how people face death. Alone.
      Doesn’t matter how many people are there around you when the time come. This is something we must face on our own.
      Jul 4
    • Indeed isbgu
      I suspect its unlikely that if you were bleeding out in your kitchen, your roommates would just let you because "you have to face it on your own"
      Jul 4
    • Amazon / Eng
      Jeff B!

      Amazon Eng

      BIO
      CEO
      Jeff B!more
      If you’re dying for sure, it doesn’t matter what your roommate does. Otherwise you’re not dying.
      Jul 4
  • Pinterest
    lalaoolala

    Pinterest

    PRE
    Facebook
    lalaoolalamore
    Accidentally posting a porn link at work.
    Jul 4 2
    • Expedia / Eng
      I 👁 u

      Expedia Eng

      BIO
      Getting better at what I do
      I 👁 umore
      Lol 😂
      Jul 4
    • Google Devil
      👍🏼👌👏
      Jul 4
  • Unity / Eng
    bonfire

    Unity Eng

    PRE
    Amazon
    bonfiremore
    Trump winning 2020 and the world keeps getting worse without a clear view of how we'll get rid of lying populists
    Jul 5 9
    • Sony wWNe61
      @qGcX07: Please educate us on those policies. It’s hard to find those in plain sight for normal folks like me. Any sane person can agree there is constant lying, erosion of the constitution, abuse of power. If you are just talking about the economy, it’s been in an upward trend since Obama. If the good thing you refer to is the fact that he hasn’t tanked the economy, I agree but that’s a pretty low bar for any important position, leave alone the POTUS.
      Jul 5
    • Amazon crushcandy
      Correction: Obama implemented many climate initiatives which Trump has rolled back, just because. How about the now defunct Paris accord? Obama made many concessions in ordered get something done. The radical right will do everything in their power to ruin the globe.
      Jul 8
    • Veritas qGcX07
      Think about it : What would have happened if Clinton had come to power? Thousands of poor Syrian war victims would have entered in USA, where at least 1 in 10 think west had influenced the war in their Nation. Extreme lefts are not good for Nation either. USA need wall at Mexico border, tax reforms, if possible keep less wars, and keep the trouble away from extremism. Aren’t they make sense for Nation? Trump seems to have that.
      Jul 8
    • Amazon crushcandy
      Um no. You cannot know what would happen “if”. I never said extreme left was good. Trump has done nothing. Less than Nothing. Obama currently holds the record for undocumented deportations. Not Trump. Obama didn’t brag about it daily which is why you think he’s effective. Amazing mind control. All he has to do is say it and a certain number of ppl will blindly accept it as fact. Brilliant. There is no Wall because most Americans are against the cost and know a wall is not a solution. He has effectively convinced his base an ppl like you that it is and it was an easy campaign promise. Immigration reform is the problem. He’s done nothing about reforming the policy because that is actually very hard work. He’s super lazy and just wants to be on camera convincing gullible people that he’s doing more than he is. What tax reform? Where is that legislation? He gave our hard earned money to his rich buds. They and this crazy man do nothing for the masses, have you noticed? Pay attention. He just talks. There is no action. Action is what matters in leadership not excuses and whining about Democrats holding him back. He has driven up the debt astronomically and literally nothing to show for it. He’s ineffective. Period.
      Jul 8
    • Veritas qGcX07
      All the pressing points you conveniently discredited it!!! That ‘if’ is big if and obvious for any unbiased. And tax reform has increased the pay to almost all middle class. Ya one who has basic pay above 150k, lose some savings at the end of tax year. But that ppl are only in blind😀 This tax reform is huge boost to corporates . They are doing re-investments and in turn you see ample employment opportunities. Well even cnn says trump tax reforms is successful. No one can deny it. About the wall , many ppl still agree it is one of the way and could discourage many to enter through wall . Otw there was always political game to gain Spanish votes . Many undocumented suffer every day due to this confusing approaches. Obama had very clean way of handling undocumented immigrants living in USA, which Trump doesn’t but remember obama had hurt legal immigrants more than undocumented ones. Anyways I am only saying Trump is better than the so called liberals, who burden the Nation in order to create image as world benefactors. However I am not fan of Trump. For now Trump is better. Maybe tomorrow some one else, who could be person in Democratic Party too
      Jul 9