Whats the worst thing your parent(s) said to you?

May 11 46 Comments

Just curious to see kind of shit parents say when they get mad. I’ll go first, when my brother and I were young and my mom got really mad (we suspect now that she has bipolar disorder or something) she would sometime say things like ‘I wish you had died at birth’ 🤷‍♂️

Did y’all hear mean shit growing up too or does it sound unthinkable?

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TOP 46 Comments
  • Palo Alto Networks !💥
    "I don't see how spending this much time in front of a computer will ever help you get a job." My dad, Back in the mid 90s.
    May 11 4
    • OP
      He just did not know any better. It was meant to help you, because in his mind he was worrying you will be sad later in life if you could not get a job
      May 11
    • LinkedIn ex-fb
      Did you remind your dad is this statement?
      May 11
    • Palo Alto Networks !💥
      He's no longer in a mental state where it'd matter, unfortunately.
      May 11
    • LinkedIn ex-fb
      Ouch, that’s unfortunate.
      May 11
  • Amgen / Finance
    Mrmephisto

    Amgen Finance

    PRE
    The Walt Disney Company
    Mrmephistomore
    My dad and brother used to tell me they found me under a rock and my real mom was a slug...I was also fat so this hurt even though they were just saying it in jest.
    May 11 1
    • OP
      I feel loved ones sometimes do not realize that their jests hurt us. I was fat too and when my mom was not wishing I had died, my friends used to make fun of me being fat. I eventually learnt to embrace self-deprecating humor, to show them that I find their words funny and it did not hurt me even if it did. But looking back now, I realize they just did not know better and it was not to hurt. The little scars still remain and even though I would say, many would call me handsome now (really embraced the gym life in university lol) I am still insecure about it
      May 11
  • New / Eng hde57jg
    Worst thing? You can be anything or do anything you set your mind to.

    It's a lie. I went through the first 22 years of my life thinking that the world owed me something if I thought it did. I learned a bunch of hard lessons because my parents failed to prepare me or instill any drive to succeed.

    Finished undergrad at 30 and grad school at 32 and finally working in a career I enjoy.

    They should have said:

    You can be anything, as long as you bust your ass to do it. But if you don't work hard you'll just piss it all away at the bar. Hard work always trumps talent. So stop pretending that you're good just because you're talented.
    May 11 2
    • Intel apsodj
      Isn’t “set your mind to” the same thing as busting your ass?
      May 11
    • New / Eng hde57jg
      Not to a kid who never had to work hard for anything. To me thinking has never been work. Things came easily until they didn't anymore and I had no work ethic for mental things. So I just quit because I figured everyone good at something had never had to work at it. No one ever taught me what work looked like outside of a shovel, wheelbarrow, hammer, or a garage. Eventually all my peers passed me and I kept turning a wrench until in my mid 20s I learned that talent is a myth.

      Now I know that engineering, just like wrenching, is a skill to be built over time. And hitting the books is as much work as rebuilding a radar or learning how to field strip a pistol blind folded. It's the same repetition based effort.
      May 11
  • F5 Networks buzz-word
    Get married!
    May 11 4
    • OP
      Why? So I can take my repressed anger and pain and take it out on my wife and kids? 😂
      I’ll pass
      May 11
    • F5 Networks buzz-word
      No. After marriage, parents will look like gods by comparison
      May 11
    • Amazon / Eng idk_
      Yeah I can imagine, all of my girl friends have been crazy. Except for my current girl of course lol
      May 11
    • Verizon Media sxSG85
      Not my parents but my ex-girlfriend's father: It is my last wish to see you get married with a guy from "our" caste and get married by the end of 2019.

      That's when I knew, I needed to get the hell out of that situation. Broke up with her soon after.
      I feel bad for her that she did fall prey to the classic Stockholm Syndrome and couldn't see that her father successfully manipulated her.
      May 12
  • Google MQR6
    Just want to say that no kid and no human deserves to be spoken to in such a demeaning way. We are flawed people, raised by flawed parents. Sorry you had to go thru that but I'm glad you all overcame and became badasses. "Hurt people hurt people 💔"
    May 11 4
    • OP
      I know. When I was young, this sort of behavior was norm to me, my dad and my brother and we dismissed it as one of her episodes. Being away from my parents for so long made it feel different recently when my mother had one of her phases again and said she hoped my plane would crash on my way back. It was a bit shocking hearing something so cruel after a long time and it made me realize I am a bit damaged if I take a deeper look. When I am low, I tell myself maybe I should have died. And you are right, hurt people hurt people. My grandfather hurt my mom and she became like that and I think I will be like that too so I am really considering if I should continue this shitty lineage
      May 11
    • Intel apsodj
      Are you guys parents yet?
      May 11
    • Google Mosey
      @Fleur, it sounds like your mom may have had psychiatric issues. Perhaps bipolar or narcissistic personality disorder.
      May 14
    • OP
      Read my post. I also strongly suspect BPD. It is just hard for me to understand how someone can become so evil at the drop of a hat.. especially your own parent
      May 14
  • Amazon new_ew
    "you'll never amount to anything"... Hehe.. my parents were masters of reverse psychology.
    May 11 2
    • OP
      That’s more like something they say out of exasperation. And I think that phrase really translates to ‘do something or you will not amount to anything in life’. Said to help you, not hurt you
      May 11
    • Amazon new_ew
      I agree
      May 11
  • Amazon / Eng idk_
    I was a problem child and my parents still never said anything bad to me. I guess the worse they said was “I’m disappointed in you”. Luckily I got my act together and they’re proud of me now 😊
    May 11 1
    • OP
      Wish we all had parents like that. Their support matters. I am sure they contributed to your success in life including getting in Amazon :)
      May 11
  • Druva / Other KvOF35
    My father told me multiple times a day that if I worked really hard, I just might be acceptable to the local community college in the ghetto. As a diversity candidate. Then every night they would sing the names of the local crappy community colleges to the tune of jingle bells. They thought it would make me work harder. Fuck them both. They say they made me succeed. I succeeded in spite of their general shittiness as parents. By the way, I went to a top college.
    May 11 6
    • Druva / Other KvOF35
      I moved far away.
      May 11
    • LinkedIn ex-fb
      And not in touch? I mean you could be geographically far, but still Mentally close
      May 11
    • Druva / Other KvOF35
      They sometimes call me. I avoid them.
      May 11
    • LinkedIn ex-fb
      I guess it would be better for everyone if you just tell them you’re upset about these comments and then avoid them if you choose , instead of avoiding them while they may not even remember this or know the reason for being avoided.
      May 11
    • Salesforce CapHaddock
      Apart from this, were they good parents? Like did they encourage you?
      May 11
  • Facebook hi61jd51
    Dad yelling loudly on separate occasions multiple times "you're an idiot" "I should've never had kids! I never wanted kids" and many other things were yelled and done. It's taken years for some of the memories to even start to fade.
    May 11 2
    • LinkedIn ex-fb
      Have you confronted your dad about these?
      May 11
    • Facebook hi61jd51
      A lot of growth has happened since. And he's well aware of the extensive verbal abuse/abuse he doled out.
      May 11
  • New / IT TheShyGuys
    You're not as big as a fuck up as I though you'd be . I was 7 years old
    May 11 1
    • OP
      Not sure if that’s positive or negative 😂. But you are not a fuck up man if you made it so far and are standing on your own two feet
      May 11
  • Clearstream.TV / Eng JobSearch
    “You are not my son. I think they gave me the wrong baby in the hospital”
    May 13 0
  • Intel apsodj
    Not sure, but I’m confident I’ve said some terrible shit to my kids.
    May 11 3
    • LinkedIn ex-fb
      Lol, once your kids become financially independent, they’ll probably remind you. Update the thread then
      May 11
    • Intel apsodj
      Oh, I remember what I said to my kids well.
      May 11
    • Apple abilities
      Shame on you for yelling at your kids
      May 12
  • Accenture / Eng
    urs1253

    Accenture Eng

    PRE
    ADP, Infosys
    urs1253more
    Indian parents and were tiger mom and tiger dad. Both aggressive and both micro managed. Not my brother though... my younger brother had it easy... No privacy... No way to chat with friends.... no play time ..... no eating out with friends... no cell.... not a lot if entertainment. I am no longer in touch with them. I dont take their calls neither do call them. I dont know why they hated me so much.... i got beaten by many things in some pretty sensitive places... i had my mom climb up my throat... because i scored a 60 something in a useless term test.... i had my dad beat the shit out in my 19th yr.....for spending time with another buddy of mine, at his place... building chess in C.... in my defence, we didnt have internet @ my home and coding at his place made sense for googling.... Not to my parents though.... For the record, we won the IIT software innovation contest for the program.... and of course.. they didnt have anything to say.... not even good work...
    May 15 1
    • OP
      You win 🏆
      But I do feel sorry for you bro. You are better off without this burden
      May 15
  • Ericsson / Eng rawr🙈🙉
    I’m sure I got the occasional “stop being a fucking idiot” here and there from my dad 😂 but honestly it wasn’t that bad. I knew I fucked up growing up when I would get the wooden spoon or belt (but honestly, I low key feel like it made me a better person).

    My teen years from 13-18 were very unregulated. My parents trusted me to kinda find my own way but made me understand that they were always there. I basically caused them no troubles at all. They even acknowledged this later on ahaha. I think all of this actually really shape me into a caring, empathetic person. I have found I have no problems befriending people and I think the way I was raised helped. Sorry for the wall of text 😂
    May 11 0
  • Intel apsodj
    Question for everyone: what did they say afterwards? Did they apologize, or no? My theory as a parent is that you will say and do terrible shit out of the common frustration of being a parent, but the important lesson for your kids is how you recover from your error.
    May 11 0