So I have nothing against marriage and am happy for people who found love and have had successful and happy marriages and are happy today. I am a young 28 year old, earn good money, can support myself, doesn't want to have kids and don't feel like being tied down to someone at this stage in my life. Been wondering as to why people who earn we'll get married. That's like saying "I bet you half my shit that I will never mess up our relationship", that just seems like a bet for suckers. Marriage and relationships are hard work and to me the effort vs return on them doesn't seem worth while esp if you don't plan to raise kids ever. Thoughts?
The amount of work is a lot and ever going but the returns from being in a healthy marriage is invaluable.
Why not get that without a legal contract
Most women earn less and programmed for protection/support. They will not accept a marriage without contract. Good luck with soul matching with high earning female.
At some point of financial excess you realize all of your "shit" is meaningless. Nice home, nice car nice _stuff_, whatever. Friends matter. Family matters and having a partner to journey through life is worth any amount of "stuff" and risk.
Marriage is like investing in a volatile stock - High risk high reward. If your marriage is shitty your life is ruined, if it is a good marriage the benefits are priceless.
This makes sense to me. I guess I will soon realise we all need companionship and it just boils down to the willingness to take risk.
Funny thing is I look at it as the opposite. More like a CD. It’s really hard to get out of, which makes you HODL. That’s a feature because life has ups and downs and the contractual aspect of marriage forces you to ride out the crap.
I'm married, and both my wife and I agree that marriage is actually quite stupid. The probability that we will end up getting a divorce in the future is high enough that it doesn't really make sense to marry from a financial perspective. The only real benefit we found in marriage is that when times get really tough, we will stick through it because getting a divorce is a very messy and painful process. If we weren't married during some of those tougher times, I am certain we would have broken up already. So basically, to us, marriage is like having on a pair of handcuffs with your partner lmao. We really got married due to societal and family expectations. Tax benefits are a minor benefit as well.
^this. I think marriage should be a wise decision made through a thoroughly thinking during a healthy state of mind so that it should keep you together during not healthy/wise times. So you won't regret a rush/easy decision. Also it gives both partners some form of trust in the continuity of the marriage otherwise by the time passes you will be asking yourself "how long". Relationshipt is like working at a startup you get benefits and more excitment but by the time ypu get old you want a safer coast for your ship so you go to msft. :) you want be willing to go to clubs picking up chicks trying to find the next partner for your relationship when you are 50 just to have someone who would leave you bc you don't put down the toilet. You want someone you will stick together no matter what till you or they die.
But it’s not stupid if it serves its function of keeping you two together through tough times, no? Unless you’re strictly referring to the Disney woowoo people talk about when they’re encourage you to marry.
It depends. If you get the right person, life is better. If not, it is lot worse than staying single. And people change too, usually for worse. I have not seen bad marriages get better but only good ones get worse. Can you stay being single and alone?
You don't have to be married you can be in a relationship
Too many societal expectations for most people to be able to just be in a relationship indefinitely
Marriage is totally illogical for a man in there days. I intend to have kids, likely with multiple people, and use better contracts than marriage to protect all of us
LOL. As a woman, who agrees that marriage is useless and has been part of open relationships...you’re full of yourself. I can’t pinpoint exactly where you find your fuel for that ego but it must be the size of a hot air balloon. Are you white or extremely attractive? I hope you don’t think TC will land you lots of partners.
It says a lot about your prejudices that you believe what I said has anything to do with race. It’s not difficult for someone to have kids with multiple partners (>1) over the course of 30-50 years of active sex life.
Wife has pension and a stable gov job. I can wince like all of you on here about TC.
Marriage is for fools OP. Stay on this track. Marriage is simply a legal means to ensure the woman can take money from a man. There is absolutely NO benefit for a man. Check out reddits mgtow theredpill. No point being a beta cuck for some woman.
Just wait till the shit really hits the fan. Then you find out who your real friends are and which family or SO will stand by you. “For better or for worse” sounds really good when your own birth family doesn’t stand by you when you need them, or when your gf/bf leaves you when things get real. My wife has been my go-to person for almost half my life now. I’m so glad I decided to settle down with her.
I think you sound like an entitled child.
Why? I am happy to hear your thoughts and learn from people who have been married and are more experienced than me in this regard.
Because your question sounds childish. On the other hand if you are really asking for honest input then I may have jumped the gun. As for me, because my life with my wife and family are work more than my TC. Being married makes day to day interaction much easier. Things you don’t think of like picking up her prescriptions at the pharmacy. No questions asked. But mostly, I got married because I wanted to be closer to her. Our relationship was great but I wanted more of it. I didn’t want to leave anything on the table. If there was a level 2 marriage, did level up.