Ex is getting engaged to the chick he left me for now. But why was he even with me for 3 years before that ?
Why do men leave a relationship? Did he even ever like me?
- Expedia / EngxaRe06moreI'm gonna go ahead suggest that you try a different online forum. I'm sure plenty exist if you search for one.
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- This is why keeping tabs on your ex is a bad idea. Nothing good will come out of it. Even if there is a chance of rekindling the relationship, it will be the equivalent of reheating cold pizza that’s been on the counter for 2 days. Just get a new pizza.
- Facebook / EngXTeR76moreWhy don't you ask him? Could be many reasons:
- The sex was bad or infrequent
- He wasn't that attracted to you
- You had a personality trait he didn't like
... Or perhaps he just clicked better / had better chemistry with the other person. It happens 🤷🏻♂️
- Salesforce lozeremoreExact same thing happened to me. Ex married woman his parents chose for him.
I can confidently say he loved me. He just didn't see my life aligning with his.
At the time I felt he didn't care. When I look back I see why. I empathize with his decision but I don't agree on it's execution because it caused me needless pain - which is a story for another thread.
You'll connect the dots later as well. PM me if you need to talk. I cried over this for 2.5 years after the relationship ended and couldn't move on.
Take one step forward everyday. It gets better. Also just because he gets married doesn't mean it's an elixir to all problems. He'll just have a different set of them to deal with.
- Amazon ibuddhaSorry to hear that. Don't take it personally. It's the male version of "Monkey Branching"
- Apple XOfK47Monkeys never let go of a branch when swinging until they are holding the next ones. Women more than men (but both are guilty) often do this.
They are in a relationship they aren't happy with and start putting the next one together so when they pull the ripcord on the first one, the second one is waiting, No downtime.Jan 93
- Verizon Test1!I know it sucks but the only thing you need to focus on now is you. I promise you'll look back at this time in your life as a growth experience if you take the time to heal, separate yourself emotionally/physically from your ex (no social media!) and focus on YOU! It is a new year, do something for yourself that gets you into a different environment (time to learn how to play the guitar? Sign up for the marathon prep classes at the gym? Pottery/painting?). Whatever helps you grow and realize that this relationship wasn't for you. Good luck!
- Lol sounds like I am at the losing end of things. He’s got lucky and set for life while I sit here crying about how great he was
- Microsoft / EngMP3moreI think it is great that he found a person that he is happy with. Think about it. What if he stayed with you, married you, maybe even had kids, but all this time was really in love with someone else? If you really love him, wouldn’t you want him to be happy? Can you imagine if you were in his shoes and committed to someone knowing you secretly love someone else? Would you really want him to stay with you even though deep down he knew that he was no longer in love with you? It is incredibly heartbreaking and painful. I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy. It hurts right now because you really about him.
Just like you he is only human and does not have the ability to predict the future. Do you possess magical powers to predict whom you might fall in or out of love with in 1, 3, 5, 10, 20 years? Who says there won’t be a day in 10 years time when he’ll realize that he made a mistake and should have stayed with you? That’s life. Whatever his reasons, he chose to be with you, didn’t he? And you chose to be with him. You must have cared about him, as he must have cared about you.
Can you think of him right now and see that Him you loved so much when you were together? Can you think of wonderful memories and times you shared together? Can you love the fact that the same loving person, same Him, found his happiness with someone else? He is still the same person you used to love.... he is just a little different. Different in a way you may not enjoy now, but then you loved him exactly because he is who he is, and as he continues being.Jan 92
- Amazon 1700zuluMen often leave when they have a new person in mind. Women often leave when being single is a better alternative to their current partner.
I think what you describe is the issue with serial monogamy - it keeps going until it stops working, you split, immediately get with someone else, and the cycle repeats...
Honestly, call me old fashioned but this is one good reason not to have sex (other physical stuff fine) before marriage. Women retain sexual capital and men have to commit to marriage before “getting some.” Otherwise, a guy is free to do what he did to OP.
- Withholding sex before marriage is such a bad idea. What if you are incompatible in bed? You will be trapped in a sexless marriage until the inevitable divorce, then lose half of the assets you gained during that period. Not worth the risk. I would GTFO as soon as this dealbreaker came to light.
- Amazon NsgdbpMove on and don’t look back or try to analyze things. It is hard but doable and the only good choice. More often than not people find other better people after break ups, have a ton of learning because of their past break up and become more mature at relationship stuff. Just give it time. I was crazy in love with someone who cheated on me. I was still ready to be with them as I thought I will never get anyone better. I now look back and cringe at my low sense of self worth at that time. I am now happily married for 8 years with a great person and I now feel I was with such a loser and I am glad that person dumped me as I was too stupid to do it myself. I got a much better person, relationship, and I am so happy now. I am sure you will end up with someone much better than this guy
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