unhappy marriage
Been married for 6 years. It was a hybrid arranged/love marriage. Have two kids. Have been fighting ever since we married. Wife is a good person so am I. But there is no connection. We are now barely talking to each other.
What's the reason for the fight?
wife is very defensive. any small suggestion is seen as being critical. i cannot even ask/request a simple thing without getting into an argument. we don't have a common viewpoint on anything. the gap is widening day by day..
Is your wife working? If so you just don't request/ask anything from her no matter how much she earns. It never ends well if you ask her to do something.
Leetcode you heathen. No but seriously, I donβt know what to tell you. Maybe the time with kids prevents you from having a deeper connection. Leave kids with grandparents for 2 weeks and go on a nice vacation somewhere. Also, TC or GTFO
If you were fighting ever since you got married why did you have kids and complicate it more? Serious question.
You both enjoy time with kids. Share adjustment, itβs life and both of you share the responsibility for the betterment of your kids. talk to each other and find out why you are fighting. Almost every house it happens. Adjustment and love are keys for better marriage.
^ this . Plus talk to a close friend or relative .. close to both of you . Else approach a marriage counselor
Would approach marriage counselor and put in the full effort to make it work before walking away, so that when you do, you can say you gave it your best shot and it didn't work out, so you have no regrets
isnβt there a makeup sex session?
yes, it happens frequently and its good. but we go back to square 1 after that. its a marriage of contradictions. i think deep down we have a soft corner for each toher and would like to make this work. but I think we are totally opposite personalities.
^this. That soft corner u mentioned is unconditional love between you both. Letβs say if she is saying YES to everything whatever you are saying, then there will not be any fight and you will be bored with life. Having fights will make you both release tension and finally you will be alright. Simple rule is make her happy by winning in all fights. There is nothing wrong to lose to your wife man, this is not race To see who is winning. I am married for 11 years with 1 kid and I know my wife for 14 years. Every fight happens with me losing and getting some beatings :) i know many times she is wrong so what, I am happy am losing to my wife. You both talk and best advice for you to adjust. Your Tc is much higher so donno if you listen but if you do am sure you will be happy than ever. Believe me!!
Arranged never really works.
Have a frank conversation about how you feel things are. See if there is willingness to try to change things. Go to a marriage counselor and try to work things out for the sake of your kids. If both of you can take steps towards each other you can have a better life together.
Stupid arranged marriages. Useless concept.
So you want our vote of confidence in your separation? Not being rude, just asking.
OP is overthinking. I added my opinion below, suggesting OP to date his wife. Go on planned and unplanned dates.