Are you stuck in a social tech/class bubble? Is that bad?

Nov 11, 2021 22 Comments

I've realized since working in tech, more and more of my social circle is other tech folk. I do keep in contact with friends from college but realize I can't talk too much about my goals, life or spending because it's a bit out of scope for them. One of my friends I can be completely transparent with because she is a doctor and her husband an engineer but for everyone else, I feel uncomfortable. I don't want to make them feel bad. However, I love talking about spending habits, future plans, retirement, hobbies, etc. and realize that the people I can be the most open with are other tech people since they understand the lifestyle more in terms of retirement savings/maxing out accounts, affording many hobbies, travel, flexibility of remote work and high lifestyle expenses. I feel I have more in common with STEM people also because they typically share similar intellectual interests like language learning, chess, book reading, even physical stuff out here in Washington surprisingly lots of avid people who love the wilderness and a few spartan/marathon racers.

Anyways, how do you leave this "tech bubble" to meet more "normal" people without coming off as privileged and detached from the realities of the average man? I, for one, try to diversify my hobbies through sports and avoid the subject of work. I don't want people finding out what I do or where. As typically there is some shift in energy.

What have you done to remove yourself from the tech/class bubble? Do you care? Is this just a ME problem?

TLDR: how do you manage to hang out with people who aren't as rich as yourself. Those in other fields.

Edit: removed, dating text.

#tech #faang #bigtech #microsoft #google #meta #amazon #squarespace #uber #lyft #classism

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TOP 22 Comments
  • VMware
    iPeed

    Go to company page VMware

    iPeed
    inb4 move to nyc
    Nov 11, 2021 1
  • Twilio
    jboz10

    Go to company page Twilio

    jboz10
    learn humility and put yourself in their shoes about what interests them. are you even intellectually stimulating if you cannot relate to someone else’s experience
    Nov 11, 2021 2
    • OP
      You definitely didn't read the text. I said I try to omit most of my life so as not to come off as privileged. I talk to everyone when back home in NYC. It's much harder out here in Seattle. My problem is I cannot be 100% honest and transparent.
      Nov 11, 2021
    • Twilio
      jboz10

      Go to company page Twilio

      jboz10
      yeah there’s also the seattle freeze. i’m just saying from reading the post, you’re too concerned about you, how you come off, what you have to say. just let them talk
      Nov 11, 2021
  • I’ve been thinking about this too. Before tech, I was a teacher working with kids in under-resourced neighborhoods which gave me a chance to interact with the community. Now that I’m in tech, I definitely feel I’m in a bubble.

    I want to get more involved in the community through volunteering work to break the bubble and meet other people. The challenge is finding the time…
    Nov 11, 2021 1
  • That’s a wall of text that needs a tldr. That being said, join a thing like martial arts, pottery, cooking, yoga, etc. Tech people can be pretty annoying and think they’re cool but just a bunch of toxic nerds. Most come from spoiled backgrounds too which makes it that much more worse.
    Nov 11, 2021 1
  • Google
    Eheo13

    Go to company page Google

    Eheo13
    Go volunteer or something. Sounds like you’ve never really made an effort to relate to people unlike you.
    Nov 11, 2021 1
    • OP
      I should have mentioned I also do volunteering and am an avid skater. Still. Also, I never grew up in the upper class so this began pretty much when I entered the west coast tech scene. But you're right, I need to make more of an effort.
      Nov 11, 2021