After having a weed session, I realized most of my life decisions are fear or ego driven. Fear of lagging behind, fear of failing, fear of being put in PIP. Ego to prove I am the best. Went into top colleges and kind of successful at Amazon. Always do things right before the deadline. If money was no object I would probably spend all day watching youtube videos. Any of you guys feel me? I am thinking of marrying someone but again that is based more on the fear that I will not get someone better. Any of you are like this ? How to help myself? TC:180 Age:28
I think most ppl are like this, but it’s very good that u realized
When you marry someone, you make a commitment, and you are no longer living for yourself. Can you do that?
I am not sure. I am not super on the idea of marriage but since the rest of humanity has decided it’s a great idea, I don’t have an option
I'm not sure I'd feel comfortable with that attitude. When two become one, it's no longer about you. You seem to have good self awareness, so think carefully so you don't make a mess of someone's life. Love fundamentally means doing what's good for someone. Looking out for someone's happiness. Is "I'm not super on the idea of marriage" going to be enough? Don't get me wrong, most of us learn on the way, but don't marry for the wrong reason and without the willingness to follow through on your commitment. But it also means your focus will or should be away from yourself. That may be a good thing.
This is an important thing to learn about yourself. Many people are driven by those same fears. Not as many recognize it and make different choices. Do you meditate? Might check it out, it will help you recognize when you are being run by those feelings rather than true desire or interest. Can you hold off on getting married? Seek some help sorting out how you really feel about your SO? It’s one thing to realize you need to change jobs. It’s quite another to realize you made a poor choice in marriage. You are young. You have time and options. Marry for the right reasons. Don’t settle or let fear drive you to poor choices.
I feel like the things I am interested in don’t pay, if I decide to do things only for interest I won’t be where I am
But you can pursue them on the side?
You’ll be better off when you stop taking life too seriously
How to do that ?
Just remember that for whatever choice you make about anything it’s not the end of the world
Maybe you should go to therapy instead of asking blind
Hey, it works for Netflix!
Congratulations, you are officially human. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Take some time to reflect on this and decide what you really want from life, not what you’re being driven towards by your insecurities.
What's your YoE? With that TC you might not be that successful at Amazon.
I feel the same op. Many decisions so far driven by trying to be the best. But I'll soon be changing things. You must be realizing the guilt too and that it's unsustainable. Also fear of what others think of us is sillly as people hardly care.
Calm down bro, your company knows this and is sucking you dry
Some people seem so enthusiastic it almost feels like they are not driven by these things