For Ladies - Dating Guys Who Make Less
Aug 10, 2016
252 Comments
I just broke up with someone who makes less than I do. I'm an early 30s/F/seattle dating a late 30s/M. He is an engineer and has a masters but makes sub 100. There is a ~80K salary difference. Only retirement includes his company ESOP. I said that he needed to see a financial planner or this probably wouldn't pan out. I really saw a future but didn't want to be up at night worrying about his saving habits - luxury car but no retirement and low earnings (for this area). Wrong move or right on? I also felt that being older and male he probably should have made more than me.
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Here is a woman's advice: your time is running out. You have only a few more years for kids. All these engineers making millions will opt for younger and prettier women. They don't have to care that their wife makes less than them and it won't make a difference whether she makes 200K or 70K. They will choose younger, fitter, prettier lady with more potential for healthy children. And less cynical too. You will be left out. Majority of men are insecure around highly successful women and you will only be eligible for the rest. I see so many of my engineer/doctor female friends in their thirties unable to find anyone. The best ones are already tied up, and whoever remains is too old for them.
So follow your values. Good luck. But assess your own market value and objectively decide how choosy you can be at this point. If the perfect man never materializes, will you be happy to spend your life alone?