How to counter "she wants to get more visibility for herself" comment?

Nov 30, 2019 23 Comments

We are a small team of 6 people (program managers), all fairly new except for 2.

I was trying to help 4 of us who do related work, to try and get more visibility by trying to piece together all our work and connect the dots.

Instead one idiot teammate (guy) went and gave feedback to my boss that I was trying to get more visibility and be more "aggressive".

My boss gave me a big lecture about trying to fit in, and taking it slow and not be "aggressive" .

Should I confront the idiot who gave that feedback or just let it go and be more careful?


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TOP 23 Comments
    I assume (from title) that you are female. Unfortunately this seems like a typical scenario that they expect women to try to hide and not stand out. I bet both the colleague and your boss would have reacted differently... Sorry you have to deal with such idiots.
    Nov 30, 2019 3
    • Akamai Technologies hpBF22
      Google is rotting from within
      Nov 30, 2019
    • Amazon atxji
      Lmao Nvidia! Jumping to conclusions faster than maharashtra government changes CM!
      Nov 30, 2019
  • Akamai Technologies hpBF22
    Your boss is a fucking wuss ass and needs to grow a pair. That guy needs to get punched in the face.

    If I were your boss I’d give you greatly exceeds maybe even redefine expectations for tormenting your SJW coworker.
    Nov 30, 2019 1
    • Google yy444xc
      Indeed. He is not a bad guy but is new himself. Can't believe Google can be a toxic environment sometimes.
      Nov 30, 2019
  • Google kivi
    Sorry this happened. Google is generally bottom up, and you were doing exactly what you were supposed to. Please don't this discourage you.

    You should talk to the dude. Hear his side, and explain that he too gets visibility. Indirectly, you let him know that you know about the complaint. Set the expectation that next time he talks to you first before going to boss.

    You play nice, but keep a close an eye on him.

    If your boss pulls the same trick again: a) reiterate that you are attempting to be a team player, b) tell your boss that you wished dude came to you to clear up misunderstanding before escalting, c) convince boss that more unity among PM's is good for him.

    Good luck.
    Dec 1, 2019 0
  • Redfin


    Honestly dumb move by your manager telling you about the complaint. Sounds like you work with idiots tbh.
    Nov 30, 2019 4
    • AT&T MsdR32
      May be time for a new team. I'd your manager doesn't have your back over this, they may foretell larger issues later on.
      Nov 30, 2019
    • Walmart gehs5pk
      This ^
      Dec 2, 2019
  • Microsoft iamletired
    Did you communicate with your teammate about what you were doing? Without context, that sort of thing can come across as very underhanded
    Nov 30, 2019 1
    • Google yy444xc
      We were all part of the things we were doing. Nothing was done without their knowledge. They all nodded their heads at that time.
      Nov 30, 2019
  • If you don't like the team, just change to a new team
    Dec 2, 2019 0
  • Target / Design wdlnd
    Also, I’m not sure how seeking the visibly required for any worthwhile project to succeed is a negative thing. I’d expect your manager would encourage that behavior. Isn’t team visibility and impact a key objective for managers?
    Dec 2, 2019 0
  • Wayfair / Eng

    Wayfair Eng

    A new grad in a new city :)
    Unfamous opinion - I would agree with your boss about fitting in. While you trying to connect dots and get everybody some visibility for your work, this also means you taking the ownership for the visibility of their we work, which makes all of you slightly good and you, much better. Nobody likes when someone tries to be their boss and manage their work for them. I'm not saying you shouldn't do this, especially because it contributes to your team, workflow and you. You should make others in your team want you to do it. I heard likeevelling with subordinates is very important at Google. I can imagine how important it is to have strong relationship and making everybody feel equal in a team.
    Dec 1, 2019 0
  • Cruise Automation blankstare
    PMs is a function that needs to get visibility or else no one understands what you're doing. Most jobs are like that, performance review season is literally a visibility contest. If your manager doesn't understands this I wonder how good they are at getting resources.
    Nov 30, 2019 0
  • New XoAY48
    If you can let it go and just work for projects benefit, you will eventually get recognized. You will build skill. Note: I am not a PM.
    Nov 30, 2019 0


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