I just want my life back

New SOFE32
Feb 12, 2018 24 Comments

I’m not in tech like the rest of you, but I do work at a popular startup in SF, so I guess that’s close enough. My friend sent this app to me tonight because we’re both dealing and have dealt with similar issues of harassment and assault in the workplace.

Anyway, what I do know is that there are many other people out there who feel like me. Many, many, many women...and there are men too. These people, like me, want their life back. They want to stop having nightmares. They want to be able to go to work and not be afraid. They want to know that one small thing throughout the day won’t cause them to excuse themselves abruptly and run to the bathroom. Not because they actually have to use it, but because they don’t want their coworkers to see them crying for no apparent reason. They want to know why their harasser is beloved by so many people and why they buy his phony nice guy facade when they have been a victim of his harassment and in some cases, assault. And then when they try to speak up, they wonder why they are gaslighted so everyone thinks they are crazy.

I know some women have it far worse than me, but this does hurt. This is torture and I’m thankful I have a place to just say all of this even if no one reads it. I just want no other woman to deal with this. That’s what I want. #MeToo

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TOP 24 Comments
  • Tinder IDNM33
    It's sad that anybody has go through that. Reading this, I want you to know that your voice is heard. You are not crazy, you are not alone.
    Feb 12, 2018 0
  • Tata / Sales RandyS
    OP, if serious, start interviewing and land something else. Before you give notice, go to HR to get documentation that you tried to work it out with company. Then file charges w/police for any assaults or harassment. Then sue.

    Do not tell other people about this, though. Talk to lawyer and extremely close friends only.

    It’ll work out. Speaking from experience.
    Feb 12, 2018 4
    • Not reporting it to HR could cause suspicion, it's all about documentation.
      Feb 13, 2018
    • Tata / Eng EurMom
      ^yas
      Feb 13, 2018
  • Spotify Random121
    Get out of there! No job, no matter how good on paper, is worth that.

    Yes, you shouldn’t have to be the one to leave it if you are the one being harassed. The fact that he is getting away with it is bullshit. But sometimes it’s more important to take care of yourself and your mental health than to “do the right thing”.
    Feb 12, 2018 0
  • New IWrh38
    Here’s what you need to do. Document it and gather up evidence and tell HR. Once it happens about 3 times and there is still an issue. Time to contact a good lawyer. You might have to go somewhere else to work. Sue your company using said lawyer, you will likely win. My friend did this, she was given a huge package and she was able to leave and search for a new job. This isn’t legal advice but just ask a lawyer first
    Feb 12, 2018 0
  • Capital One JnDM815
    Sorry to hear it OP. This app or the hashtag is not going to help you out. You have to report a crime whenever it is committed.
    Feb 12, 2018 0
  • Salesforce PowC33
    This brought back memories. While it really sucks, those kinds of experiences can help make you very tough and resilient if you can get through it.
    Feb 12, 2018 0
  • VMware mxMa33
    Snowflake
    Feb 13, 2018 1
    • Did this trigger you sweetie?
      Feb 13, 2018
  • Google BezosJr
    First of all you don’t deserve this.
    Second, use this platform to report this asshole. At least it will start bringing his true side through this unfiltered platform.
    Feb 12, 2018 1
    • Capital One JnDM815
      Or maybe, just maybe sue him/her and let the judicial system do its job? But I guess it is easier to ruin someone reputation over rumors rather than actually investigating the issue 😞
      Feb 12, 2018
  • SoundCloud CiUI77
    I’m sure it’s easier said than done to just get out. But I agree, you should get out if you can.
    Feb 12, 2018 0
  • Aon Hewitt qTXq04
    This platform is the perfect place to out him as well
    Feb 12, 2018 0

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