Interracial dating: Indians vs. East Asians

Sep 10, 2019 68 Comments

I’m finding it hard to ignore the prevalence of WMAF (white-male, asian-female) couples in the Bay Area. It is dominated by East Asian, sometimes Southeast Asian females. Indians seem to stay within their culture. I myself am East Asian so I can come up with theories as to why this happens for us, but I don’t know Indian culture enough to understand why Indians still stay within race - in particular why we don’t see more white male indian female couples. I’d love to hear others’ thoughts on this, especially Indian peoples’ thoughts!

Serious responses only please, as this is a serious question.

TC 450K

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TOP 68 Comments
  • Cadence / Eng
    pretzle

    Cadence Eng

    PRE
    Intel Corporation
    pretzlemore
    I am Indian (F), don't want to date an Indian, family is fine too! Sadly I can't find anyone. I do envy the asian chicks!
    Sep 10, 2019 11
    • Oracle
      not_larry

      Oracle

      PRE
      Amazon
      not_larrymore
      So Cadence, rate yourself on scale of 1-10.
      Sep 10, 2019
    • Microsoft Fakir
      ^ hahahaha
      Sep 12, 2019
  • Airbnb iAmFriski
    It’s obvious isn’t it?

    From the Asian side:

    White guys are considered an upgrade for Asian girls and families. For example, many white men have told me the Asian families love them. To be associated with whiteness is good, as is normal in our society. (Not hating, it’s just the way it is). And there’s definitely an element of girls thinking dating white guys means they’re Americanized. (This affects many races)

    Indian families don’t really fall for that. Well to be honest, I think many other Asian cultures are not that fascinated with whiteness, but I might be wrong.

    From the white guy’s side:

    There’s definitely some yellow fever going on. And, Asian girls (as a group) probably have the most amount of white girl features that are considered attractive. And of course, white men generally actively participate in the dating scene, so they get into more relationships.

    In my experience, a 7/10 white girl will at least go on a date with you if you’re decent. But the standards are much higher for Asian girls if you’re not white or Asian.

    And of course, Indian men are near the bottom of the dating hierarchy, so there’s that.

    Like if you agree.
    Sep 10, 2019 8
    • NBCUniversal melong
      I'm a Korean female and my family wants me to date a Korean guy. My bf is white and my family is not super stoked about it. But when I dated a Hispanic guy, they were more upset. so now I think they're taking my white bf as "at least he's not hispanic"

      I think the same goes for a lot of asian family. They start preferring their own ethnicity (not even race. My family did not like my chinese bf).
      Yes, my family is racist and it's because they're not used to living with multiple races (most of they're still in Korea)

      But as they're getting more open to America, white becomes the most accepted race because they're what's on the media.
      Indian people I think still has strong preference to their own probably derived from their long history, pride and they value their family's opinion more strongly than others in general. Also, they've prob gone through more rejections in dating pool which makes them even more hesitant to go outside of their race. East Asian girls benefit from all kinds of media exposure that started with wrong stereotypes and now is fixing itself.

      So that's my guess on asian girls liking white men and indian people dating only each other.

      I do wonder how there are so many white male/ asian female couple though. I think it's beyond my observations listed here to make it one of the phenomenon
      Sep 11, 2019
    • Cruise Automation / Eng ⛸️
      I'm Chinese.
      We are implicitly encouraged to date Asian. My sister's bf is Filipino and at first they were hesitant but they've really warmed up to him.

      They subtly expressed disapproval with my cousin's bf (who is Brazilian) and with my white uncle who married my aunt - she only gave in because they said he stalked her and bought her flowers every day until she gave up and gave in - and how dysfunctional their family is today (they eat and watch different things and have like no overlapping interests).

      My sister and I have not dated white.
      Sep 11, 2019
  • Facebook rYhu00
    Cause chicks only dig white guys.
    Sep 10, 2019 4
    • Google GeeGee
      OP
      So...why don’t Indian girls date white guys?
      Sep 10, 2019
    • Facebook rYhu00
      I have a lot of female Indian friends dating white men, not a single guy dating a girl that's non Indian.

      I don't have any problems with parents, but I think it's really hard to date girls in the Bay. I have another theory about the negative stereotypes for Indian men keeping the girls away.
      Sep 11, 2019
  • Microsoft tpqv04
    Putting whiteness on a pedestal is definitely a thing. East Asian and Indian societies are sadly also obsessed with whiter skin colors. Many 'liberal' Indian chicks also fancy dating white guys and stigmatize their own kind in their mind. Many Indian girls suddenly start finding Indian guys annoying when they move here. Again, not all but many.

    I see lots of smart, in shape brown ABCD dudes struggling in the dating market. If you're fresh off the boat - that's even worse. Ugly ass white dudes fare better than decent looking asian men.

    Internalized racism is real folks. If the society was actually color blind, you would see as many white women dating non-white men as you see white men dating non-white women. For anyone who isn't aware, please go read OK Cupid's founder Christian Rudder's book dataclysm where he clearly reveals real data from dating apps that show that Asian men are being penalized for being Asian.

    Anyone can be attracted to anyone, that's fine. Asian girls should just be upfront about the fact that race and skin color play an important role in what they're attracted to, in addition to height and earning potential, etc.
    Sep 10, 2019 4
    • Databricks strongrand
      As an out of shape & slightly balding India-raised man in the bay area, I have never felt this. No offense intended, but maybe it's you.
      Sep 10, 2019
    • Microsoft tpqv04
      Never felt what? Care to elaborate about your experiences please?
      Sep 10, 2019
  • Google blindv
    Most Idian parents are not accepting of their children dating outside of their race. Heck, even dating outside your own caste is heavily frowned upon. For a lot of Indians, dating someone from a different country (or even caste) means permanently damaging their relationship with their parents. That is one of the main reasons.
    Sep 10, 2019 0
  • Oracle
    not_larry

    Oracle

    PRE
    Amazon
    not_larrymore
    GTFO or TC.

    (Answer is Mummy Pappa)
    Sep 10, 2019 0
  • Google GfTq22
    Serial Asian dater here. I’m also part Asian, 25%. White girls tend to be fat, look old quickly, and the fit ones seem to steer towards square jawed beef cake white guys. Asian girls are a similar build to me, and value things I bring to the table.

    I married a Filipina and then we broke up and I dated a bunch of other Asians, and am now back with the wife. We had our cultural problems but over time she became more American and I became more Filipino, so now we are cool.
    Sep 10, 2019 4
    • eBay maybeno
      “White girls tend to be fat”, I would say Asian girls look malnourished
      Sep 11, 2019
    • Google GfTq22
      @eurus I think so. She is very traditional and feminine, but certainly not passive/submissive. IMO Asian female passivity stereotypes tend to be promoted by people that don’t really know much about Asian women.
      Sep 11, 2019
  • For most Asians and their families, dating a white guy is some sort of an "achievement". For Indians, they don't care about that. Historically, Indians have not idolized the white race or culture, and a fine example of that is Bollywood. While most of Asia heavily consumes Hollywood movies and English music, India doesn't despite having more English speakers than all other Asian countries.
    Sep 10, 2019 2
    • F5 Networks RRA
      No. Indians are just obsessed with fairness and complexion...
      Sep 10, 2019
    • eBay maybeno
      Obsessed with fairness but not white race people
      Sep 11, 2019
  • Google toofani
    I am dating outside my race. Parents have no clue, so I would say parental pressure
    Sep 10, 2019 6
    • Roku cruella
      I wouldn't dare
      Sep 10, 2019
    • Uber yammmm
      Help us out Bobby B!
      Sep 11, 2019
  • Oracle / Eng aham
    Some Indians are vegetarian and prefer partner with same preference (not all). Also, there is a myth or general observation that Western society has more divorces and hence no stability.

    Many Indians are very close to their family and are skeptical if their parents will be open to a non Indian partner. There might be many other reasons!
    Sep 10, 2019 0

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