A few years ago my wife convinced me to lend money to her father. I wasn’t sure this is a good idea, but she said it’s for his business and that she has lent him money in the past and he will pay it back. It was 35k dollar and back then this was almost all the cash we had saved. We had argued a few times initially when I realized that he is probably not going to pay it back, at least not any time soon. I haven’t brought up the issue in a while. Now we have saved a lot more money and we want to buy a house. I’m thinking this is a good time to ask for this money back (because we have a reason for needing it for down payment), but I’m not sure she will ask him. Should I just let it go or actually insist that she asks him to pay us back?
This is why you don't lend money to family or friends. Gift it to to them but never lend it. This sucks man, and good luck.
Let it go ?? At least give him a piece of your mind . Don’t be a sissy
Why ask? You aren’t getting it. If he cared a shit about the money he took...he would already be working to get it back to you. It’s not like he just...forgot. :( sorry for your loss.
Loans to family should be considered gifts/charity from the start. If you don’t love your wife, then ask your father-in-law directly.
And if he loves his wife, ask him indirectly lol
Chalk it up as a fee for his daughter, then everytime he visits charge them a cover fee $100
Never ever lend money to friends and family. It just poisons everything. You can gift them money if you wish. But it’s probably gone. If you can get any money back, count yourself lucky.
I disagree with this. My parents have lent me money a few times and I have paid them back every single time. That’s my expectation of when they lent money to my siblings and sister/brother -in-law as well though I have never confirmed this.
The key to be happiness and do the right thing is set expectation for yourself, not other people. Expectation for yourself is for growth, expectation for others is for disappointment.
Every society has some version of “Honor thy mother and father.” None of them have a version of “Honor your son-in-law.”
You married into it. Did you do a proper loan with paperwork and interest? If so, you can write it off on taxes. Otherwise consider it a gift and it keeps the little wifey happy. You don’t want to make wifey unhappy.
Keep giving gift on paper every year and write off
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My Indian friends, why some of you want to go back to India?
It’s probably gone. Good luck.