Recently laid off - 5 months pregnant
I’m at a weird crossroads and I have a serious question for you guys. I had an interview today (intro call) and whenever I brought up that I’m pregnant the tone of the conversation completely changed. I don’t want to be dishonest but at the same time I need a job and I feel like I’m shooting myself in the foot. Should I wait until later in the process to bring it up, wait until I get hired or continue to bring it up in the first phone call. I’d be working with recruiting so I feel like its a conversation that needs to be had. I understand why the change of tone but I can’t help I was laid off in the middle of my pregnancy alongside nearly 100 other people. Helppp 🙁
First of all let’s acknowledge you’re in a really really tough spot. It’s going to be a struggle to find something so start planning for a plan B scenario where you don’t find employment before you’re due. That said I wouldn’t bring your pregnancy up in the phone screen conversation. If you can, wait until you’re talking directly to the hiring manager. They are the one who needs to make the decision about making an allowance for you because you make that much better an impression than your non-pregnant competition. Good luck!
This!
This, don’t break into jail
Can they even ask that you are pregnant if you don’t tell?
Technically no but I’m due in May so the conversation needs to be had. I hate to be dishonest with my team but I feel like I’m jeopardizing a good opportunity by telling them off the bat. I think I’ll wait until the process is solidified a bit before I tell them about it.
Just don’t say anything till you have cleared at least the phone interview. After phone interview tell the recruiter that I just wanted to let you know that I am pregnant and hope this doesn’t change anything. I know this isn’t the most ethical thing to do, but discrimination against female candidates just because they are pregnant is also not the most ethical thing to do. You have to optimize for your case, and I guess this is the way to go.
Also you really don’t need to tell anything to anyone even for the on-site. It’s your prerogative to share the information about your pregnancy, and until they decide to hire you, you aren’t obligated to tell them anything. Only after getting hired you have the obligation to tell your manager because you will miss work for some days. No one has any right to know about your pregnancy status unless it affects them.
Say nothing at any stage. It is illegal for them to ask about it anyway. If you get through to an onsite, they will see that you are pregnant, problem solved and the ball is in their court. Don't limit your opportunity for an onsite by mentioning it at all.
This is the best answer here. Don’t open up yourself to discrimination because of your current condition. Most companies have either a one year cliff on parental leave benefits or allow them right away because they’re ok with it. Scenario time: You get into the funnel with company A and start with a recruiter call. You bring up your pregnancy. Recruiter decides to move on with other candidates. You didn’t provide enough signals to warrant a hire. You start process with company B. Recruiter call goes well and you don’t bring your condition up. Recruiter gets a good signal and moves you up to a phone screen with hiring manager. Hiring manager loves you and you have provided a second positive signal. You come onsite for a final interview round. Obviously very pregnant but the interviews go well. Very hard to dismiss your candidacy now given your signals.
Don’t say anything at all. Unfortunately there are some subconscious biases that people have and may adversely affect your candidacy. There are plenty of people who start work and go on parental leave right away. Go through the motions and get through the interviews. No one can ask and you should not offer this information at all until you have an offer.
My friend recently went through this scenario. She is a lawyer, due end of March. She had started the interview process before she was pregnant, but by the time she got the offer she was 4-5 months along. She only told them after she was hired. Her reasoning was if she told them before it also puts them in an awkward position if they don't hire her because she could claim discrimination based on her pregnancy/ disability status. She told them after she was hired & reassured them she will be returning to work after her maternity leave is over.
I will stick to the saying don't tell until they ask , they can't ask as it is unethical , so you wont even get a chance to tell .After getting offer you can smoothly check the maternity leave policies and apply accordingly
Don’t say anything at all and don’t feel bad about it: it’s illegal to discriminate against that and asking put them at risk. So you’re doing the right thing for yourself and other pregnant women by owning it the way you are entitled to. Focus on the interview, showing your value, and convincing them that you’re a great fit, act as if being pregnant was never gonna be a problem. Once you’re onsite, if they ask give them a weirded out look and ignore it. If they insist tell them “you know that you’re taking a huge legal risk by just asking this, right? Let’s just pretend I didn’t hear this” and then go back to showing your best self, that you’re a great fit. Now you’re making them a favor by having not answered. Option A: they insist again. Do you really want to work for such assholes? Option B: they realize they messed up won’t ask again, and you won’t let them use your pregnancy against you and maybe they’re grateful you gave them a way out.
Agree with all above. Just as a mental note, believe in yourself and what talent /skills you offer to the company. Progressive companies will understand that being away from work for short time can happen for many reasons for both men and women including accidents/disability...
People want to be progressive but some things don’t make sense for a business like hiring someone that you know is going to leave that you also have to keep paying. The only incentive right now is to simply not say that’s the reason you are not qualified. The incentives have to be further aligned for this circumstance to be favorable to an employer. Not sure what to do