Being the only woman in team

Amazon / Eng
timeout

Go to company page Amazon Eng

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Intel
timeout
Nov 1, 2018 54 Comments

My site used to be a startup that was recently acquired by Amzn. Before the acquisition they had no technical women. After the acquisition there was some extra considerations about diversity, and under that background I was hired.

Having only one technical woman, the team is very careful around me, for example they swear a lot in meetings, but when they realize I’m in the room they apologize right away. So I can see that they don’t feel comfortable around me. They go out to lunch or hang out after work for drinks and never invite me, which is understandable. However, a lot of work related discussions happen at these occasions. Decisions are made without me, and I’m only informed of changes in project direction after the fact, this even with things I proposed. Another frustration is that I think men do not want to be challenged by women in technical areas. Or, perhaps partly because men think differently, when I disagree they all seem to band together to defend each other, so my ideas never come through. I was only expected to take direction from the men and do the grunt work, even though I have just as many yoe as them.

It’s been frustrating. Does anyone have similar experience?

Previously I was at a slow moving legacy tech company where they pursued diversity aggressively. And as a result there were many women. But the guys blamed the slowness of the company on having all the women.

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TOP 54 Comments
  • “Previously I was at a slow moving legacy tech company where they pursued diversity aggressively. And as a result there were many women. But the guys blamed the slowness of the company on having all the women.”
    Let me guess: Intel? 😁
    Nov 1, 2018 6
    • ^ not exactly. Did you know SJWs are lobbying to legalize 72 different genders?
      Nov 1, 2018
    • Intel / Eng
      Oliv

      Go to company page Intel Eng

      Oliv
      As far as I know, Intel has increased % of women only during last ~3 years ( and only now reached the parity with market availability). Moreover, the key decision makers, MCM and certainly CEOs have been man. So.....your logic does not hold water. If Intel is moving slower then 30-40 years ago, it is not because of women, but because of mediocre men that are at all levels at Intel. You seem to be one of those mediocre men. And you are certainly a despicable chauvinist!
      Nov 11, 2018
  • Oracle / Eng
    Figment

    Go to company page Oracle Eng

    Figment
    “They go out to lunch or hang out after work for drinks and never invite me” - smart guys; in today’s world you never know what can get someone in trouble.
    Nov 1, 2018 7
    • I agree with figment. I saw similar things happening in our org. People are afraid of metoo every where
      Nov 1, 2018
    • New / Eng
      shablamo

      New Eng

      shablamo
      Be alone in a room with another woman. Get blackmailed for life because its her word vs yours. #metoo
      Nov 11, 2018
  • Amazon
    Redmondy

    Go to company page Amazon

    Redmondy
    In today’s episode of Blind: mediocre tech bros blaming women for their mediocrity
    Nov 1, 2018 4
  • New
    oh1

    New

    oh1
    Since this blind I will give you the truth. Because of the metoo movement, I will also exclude my female colleagues from all non essential activities.

    No offense but women brought it on themselves. Guys will be increasingly unwilling to interaction with women.
    Nov 1, 2018 3
    • New
      oh1

      New

      oh1
      In a professional setting....
      Nov 1, 2018
    • Intel
      babubhatt

      Go to company page Intel

      babubhatt
      So you’re saying that women - by speaking up against assault and harassment - are to blame for being excluded at work?

      Wow.
      Nov 1, 2018
  • Intel
    Pointless4

    Go to company page Intel

    Pointless4
    I was an intern at a start up, and was told to never wear makeup or be alone in a room with anyone since I was the only woman in a company of 20. They had other interns that were guys, but made me clean the office and bathrooms in addition to tech work. Since I was an intern, I didn’t have much say to begin with so I can’t comment on them listening or not listening to my ideas.

    I’m sorry your situation is terrible :( I would look for another job, as I’m assuming HR won’t be much help ha
    Nov 1, 2018 5
    • Intel
      Ia64

      Go to company page Intel

      Ia64
      @Pointless4 , you can never really convince the fbTs out there of your value. If you are kicking butt, let your manager be aware of it. Set expectations clearly and define what success means to him/her and execute as per plan. Feel free to DM if you need any guidance on navigating Intel.
      Nov 1, 2018
    • The problem is, people like @Pointless4 WOULDN’T NEED TO convince others if there wasn’t an identity-politics driven diversity push. Whether you like it or not, it’ll only get worse.
      Nov 1, 2018