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Thought we could share some stories around some wtf/dumb/funny moments at the office that you have experienced. Please mention when, where and what but preferably no PII please :)
Ex:
Last week, building 17 SanJose
Person walks in 30mins late for a 1hr meeting and brings in 3 bagels with cream cheese (1 of them untoasted). He proceeds to eat all 3 bagels in under 10mins, is barely able to breathe while eating because he doesn't pause between bites. He then has nasal wheezing for 5mins after the intense bagel binge. He finally leaves the room with 15mins to spare in the meeting.
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1. Walks up a to an African American in the team and says "Yo Cuz! 'Ssssup cuuuz"
He said "Umm.. good man. How about you?"
Manager chuckled and said, "You didn't get what cuz means? Isn't that what you people call each other? Haven't you watched The Wire?"
2. Manager walks up to an American born Korean descent guy in the team and says "Yo Joe! What's your real name?"
He said, "Umm.. Joe. Joe is my real name"
Manager chuckled and said, "You seriously think I can't pronounce it? Come on now! Try me". Kept bothering him until the guy gave him a made up, obviously unpronounceable Korean name.
3. After an engineer presented a legit POC on improving the performance of our service, he got all jealous for the praise the engineer got and said, "You know, I used to write compilers when I was 11. And then stopped when Java came"
The whole room fell silent.
4. A co-worker set him up for a date. He came back the next day and said, "She was just like everyone else. Behind my money. I mean why? Can't a man talk about his boat and an apartment in mid town Manhattan casually anymore? Jeez"
Got in the elevator, looked down at my phone and calendar to find what conference room to go to. Found it.
Went to this particular floor and conf room, no one was around yet (I was a tad early). I decided to walk towards the back past the phonebooths and offices to where a bunch of empty cubes were.
Walked over to a window and began talking, there was no one around at the time.
Then I heard something faint. What the fuck was that, I was thinking to myself.
I go back to listening to a voicemail and then I hear the sound again. This time a little bit louder.
I look to my left and about 3 rows down amongst all of these empty cubes I spot a purse on a desk.
I walk over. Sound gets a little more prominent.
I walk slowly and sort of peer over the cube to see if there was a person there.
Yep there sure was.
A little brunette (presumably intern - she looked really young but who knows) was deep throating a senior director (I didn't know his title at the time, but found out later). He had his eyes closed the whole time I was peering over.
I slowly walked back around the cubes and into the conference room, to meet my colleagues, manager and some other folks.
They mentioned they had invited a few folks from a service team. A person responded on Biba during out conference that they were running late (I had no idea who this was).
Then about 15 mins later, I see this same senior director walk into our meeting and sit down saying he was sorry he was late. Then that person who sent the late notification on Biba joined the meeting to share a slide.
Dude is a legend.
TL; DR:
Flew into a meeting while at AWS and was early. Found an intern deep throating a guy. Realized a few minutes later said guy was an invited guest from an AWS service team to share info and was a senior director. Fucking legend