How did you plan your career when both spouses work and have kids?

May 22, 2018 39 Comments

How did you balance your career growth with commitments to your family? I have significant career aspirations but after having kids feel I have to pick between career growth and spending time with kids. While I don't mind pausing on career growth I worry that not growing for 5-6 years may be perceived negatively by future employers. I would appreciate answers from folks who have faced such a dilemma before and how they handled it.
#womenintech

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 TOP 39 Comments
  • Yahoo
    Blam

    Go to company page Yahoo

    Blam
    To be honest, I gave up on career ambitions. I value time with my kids > work now. I understand the desire and drive for career ambitions, but having kids (and a significant health scare) put it all into a different perspective for me.
    May 22, 2018 3
    • New
      $blinder

      New

      $blinder
      Btw... I come in the latter camp.
      May 22, 2018
    • VMware
      yootube

      Go to company page VMware

      yootube
      Agree with this, work is work but seriously rather get paid 1/2 the amount and have more time with them.
      May 22, 2018
  • Salesforce / Other
    444444

    Go to company page Salesforce Other

     444444
    Why do women have to sacrifice? Why can’t men stop worrying about career growth and start spending more time with kids?
    May 22, 2018 10
    • This is all some male BS, not actually helpful to the original question. I have kids and breastfed/pumped while working full time. My husband also works full time. He does the dishes, cleans the apartment, and is incredibly hands on with our kids. They love him as much as they love me. With regard to balancing career, it is give and take and every week is different. Outsource everything possible (cleaning, cooking) so that time spent together is quality time. Career balance with husband is give and take: sometimes I lean at work in and he has to shoulder more, sometimes he leans in and I have to shoulder more. Communicate, set expectations, and accept imperfection all around. You can do it!
      May 22, 2018
    • Salesforce / Other
      444444

      Go to company page Salesforce Other

       444444
      Many men won’t give a damn about equality until it comes to their daughters and then they start complaining.
      May 22, 2018
  • Epic / Eng
    Nandy1980

    Go to company page Epic Eng

    PRE
    Intel
     Nandy1980
    Mine is a joint family - my parents live with me. With so many people in home, we don't stress much about it. While we work, my parents take care of the kid (they love it as well. Otherwise, they get bored as they are retired). After coming home, we spend time with the kid.
    May 22, 2018 2
  • VMware
    yootube

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    yootube
    Retire early, then you don't need to worry about career growth
    May 22, 2018 2
  • LinkedIn
    改邪归正

    Go to company page LinkedIn

    改邪归正
    You don't. Your career will probably plateau for a while until the kids are older and you can reengage with your job more.

    I'm not even the primary child caretaker and I'm exhausted.
    May 22, 2018 1