#MeToo

Dec 12, 2017 129 Comments

Have you experienced sexual harassment, sexual assault, or sexism at your current or previous company? And if so, at which company and did HR fix the problem?

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TOP 129 Comments
  • Autodesk / Mgmt
    Revit

    Autodesk Mgmt

    PRE
    Yahoo
    Revitmore
    I was molested and sexually harassed by multiple women in the last 6 months .. Being a strong Asian male , I did not report to HR as I feel no action would be taken.. how to fix this ?
    Dec 12, 2017 20
    • Microsoft / Mgmt Бабушка
      @mp3:
      I'm male and have had similar experiences. For better or worse, I've perceived them as "compliments" because I never felt intimidation or the urge to HAVE to respond in a certain way for fear of retaliation...
      Dec 13, 2017
    • Uber vgxt14
      @biz exec: You have the kind of attitude that enable abuse of men and women.
      Dec 13, 2017
    • Uber vgxt14
      babywka: it is common to tell men that you should view it as a compliment or luxury when a woman you are not interested in sexually harasses you. Because she makes herself sexually available.

      You are also told from when you are a child that to be a good man you must be careful to not make her feel bad or rejected after making sexual advances, effectively making you responsible for your harassers emotions in addition to yours.

      At least to me my experience seem very similar to how the women that are harassed feel, so I feel it’s unreasonable to ask me to respond “like a man” and bottle it up.
      Dec 13, 2017
    • Visa Zarkon
      I say enjoy it :d
      Dec 14, 2017
    • Uber vgxt14
      @zarkon: I think it shows a lack of empathy to tell anyone to just enjoy being sexually harassed
      Dec 15, 2017
  • Cisco UCMH38
    From a manager while eating lunch in the break room: “May I ask you a question? Are your breasts real? Because, wow!”

    From a director: [grabs my hand] “Come out with me.” Me: “No thanks, my husband made dinner for me tonight. I’m heading home.” Him: “I’m married, you’re married...who cares? Let’s go.” This is the same guy who leered at me so much that my (male) manager (also a great friend) noticed it and got pissed off.

    I’m pretty easygoing but damn.
    Dec 12, 2017 12
    • Apple Malparido
      Holy shit this thread. Do you work at Meraki?
      Dec 13, 2017
    • Microsoft / Mgmt Бабушка
      @Salty: being asked such a question when the one asking is in your management chain is certainly harassment, do you agree?

      Being asked by a peer colleague (male or female) is harassment too as defined by msft policy.
      Dec 13, 2017
    • Microsoft SaltyD
      In the encounters I’ve described, I never felt those questions were harassment. I just think people often don’t have the greatest judgement about what fits in the personal versus professional spheres.

      That said, if the same person made repeated comments about my body that would be a different story.

      People do make mistakes (Obviously I’m just talking about a few comments not groping or worse!) If the person then repeats it, it’s time to report it. Luckily, I’ve never had to.

      This is just my personal way of dealing with these situations and I’m not saying anyone is wrong to report harassment at any stage they feel uncomfortable.
      Dec 13, 2017
    • Adobe MikeD
      @MP3’s it’s dangerous to believe that either all alleged victims are telling the truth or that they are all lying. That’s the whole purpose of a trial. That said, empirical data suggests that the prevalence of false allegations are quite low. The numbers differ, but are certainly low enough that we should avoid dismissing allegations.

      Furthermore, what we also know is that victims feel unsafe and unempowered and I believe comments like yours contribute to victims feeling like they shouldn’t come forward.

      Shame on you.
      Dec 15, 2017
    • New / Mgmt
      SpeakUp123

      New Mgmt

      PRE
      Oracle
      BIO
      Trying to make a social impact, revolutionizing employee participation
      SpeakUp123more
      Woices App (woicesapp.com) is a platform created to give every employee a voice without fear of consequences. It enables employees to report incidents directly to someone from top management instantly, privately and discreetly hence taking away fear of retaliation while still bring heard. It helps ensure a safe and respectful workplace for all.
      Nov 17, 2018
  • Wells Fargo bpiS06
    What I posted is not a joke. Actually happened but I agree that women may face much worse and as a father of a girl that may work in the tech industry, this stuff has to stop.
    Dec 12, 2017 4
    • OP
      I’m very sorry this happened to you. I thought you were mocking the question. No one should have to put up with that.
      Dec 12, 2017
    • Twitch zugzug
      Not only as ‘the father of a girl’ but as a basic decent human being.
      Dec 12, 2017
    • Yahoo ve610hw
      Please stop saying “father of a girl.” You don’t have to have a daughter to think this shit is wrong, and you’re implicitly saying people without kids are excused.
      Dec 12, 2017
    • New / Mgmt
      SpeakUp123

      New Mgmt

      PRE
      Oracle
      BIO
      Trying to make a social impact, revolutionizing employee participation
      SpeakUp123more
      Of course as a father of a girl it hits home very quickly. But it does impact all of us, directly or indirectly. Woices (woicesapp.com) allows employees to report incidents without fear consequences. At least one is being heard and doesn't have to suffer in silence all by himself/herself.
      Nov 17, 2018
  • New / Eng
    asLM87

    New Eng

    PRE
    Apple
    BIO
    I like to use mind altering substances.
    asLM87more
    It gets complicated and there are always two sides to the same story
    Dec 12, 2017 5
    • Amazon peccasaur
      There are 3 sides to every story. What each person says(which is always subjective) + what actually happened(objectively).
      Dec 12, 2017
    • New / Eng
      asLM87

      New Eng

      PRE
      Apple
      BIO
      I like to use mind altering substances.
      asLM87more
      How very postmodern. I’ll bet you listen to Jordan Peterson too.
      Dec 12, 2017
    • OP
      I agree that there can be complicated situations and sometimes things can be misinterpreted. However, most of the time this is not the case. Here’s an example which was posted on Blind: https://us.teamblind.com/article/sexual-harassment--assault-at-deloitte-JY22txJf. The culture at that company seems rotten to the core based on the comments. It’s not that complicated to figure out in that case.
      Dec 12, 2017
    • Microsoft / Eng
      MP3

      Microsoft Eng

      BIO
      Troll living under the I-5 overpass
      MP3more
      @asLM87, are you implying listening to Jordan Peterson is somehow a bad thing? I must hear your argument on that.
      Dec 12, 2017
    • LinkedIn Cateyes👀
      J Peterson is a pretty smart guy. Has some over the top outlooks but a majority of what he says is logical. Problem is most think with emotion vs logic.
      Dec 12, 2017
  • Flagged by the community.

    • OP
      It’s posted under Women in Tech and I thought the person was making a joke. Am I wrong? Of course, I take it seriously regardless of gender.
      Dec 12, 2017
    • Capital One / Eng 5gnetcarbs
      Ah so it is, sorry first time on blind. It didn't come off as a joke to me, but maybe? the situation seems possible, do people tend to troll on blind?
      Dec 12, 2017
    • OP
      Sometimes. 😑
      Dec 12, 2017
    • How do you know it wasnt a woman posting that?
      Dec 12, 2017
    • eBay blueballs
      Uh oh, here we go!
      Dec 12, 2017
  • Amazon JefeBezito
    Yes, at my previous company. A VP would regularly tell me how amazing my body looked, how great my legs looked in particular jeans, etc. Totally unsolicited. He was married and I was single. I am sure some on here will say he was just complimenting me, but it created a dynamic at work where it felt like my worth to the company was based on my appearance.

    It was a startup so I don’t want to say which because I would then be identifiable. “HR” (the sales guy who took on a stretch assignment to be head of HR) actually did deal with it, and it stopped.
    Dec 12, 2017 3
    • Snapchat oxh
      Twist ending of the decade right here.
      Dec 12, 2017
    • Microsoft / Eng
      MP3

      Microsoft Eng

      BIO
      Troll living under the I-5 overpass
      MP3more
      For some reason I can’t help but imagine the sales guy dealt with the problem using his sales tactics to prove VP that you weren’t all that attractive. It worked though, which is all that matters.
      Dec 12, 2017
    • Amazon JefeBezito
      My understanding is that the VP had several other complaints so the HR person told him they were at risk of being sued. They had also recently fired a pregnant woman and there was some fear around being sued for that. So while it was a bit of a surprise when it actually stopped there were a number of factors working in my favor.
      Dec 13, 2017
  • Intel ee1502
    Yes, I get told I don't look like an engineer every fucking day it seems like. My old manager called me attractive several times in private and made jokes about women. Another guy said he'd like to see me bend over in a skirt. Another asshole just started staring at me, and asked "oh do you work out". Didn't even know this guy and said yes. He said "wow cause you have just an amazing body". I told HR, she files a report but also yelled at me for reporting it in the first place. I got ostracized from my group. No one would talk to me. All to find out it was unsubstantiated because most of these comments were in private. I was forced to find another job. That was my first job out of college... man was it a wake up call
    Dec 12, 2017 7
    • Microsoft / Eng
      MP3

      Microsoft Eng

      BIO
      Troll living under the I-5 overpass
      MP3more
      @Johnmy, you may want to get your sarcasm detector checked.
      Dec 13, 2017
    • Twitch LOG32
      There is nothing wrong with reporting something to HR. That is what HR is for. If the behavior is not a big deal, then HR shouldn't punish anybody. They could just tell the guy to knock it off.

      If someone feels uncomfortable in any way at work, bringing it up immediately is the right thing to do. That way all the miscommunications and misunderstanding can be cleared up fast, and nobody has to be punished, or continued to feel uncomfortable.
      Dec 13, 2017
    • Intel ee1502
      Microsoft, your missing the point... that kind of behavior creates a toxic work environment for the recipient. You see it as men twice my age just hitting on me. But, It's inappropriate and demeaning to be hit on at work. Period. These men should focus on the work I output rather than staring at my ass.
      Dec 13, 2017
    • Flagged by the community.

    • Amazon aCqz14
      @MP3 this is the worst piece of bullshit I've seen on Blind so far. Couldn't even finish reading your comment.
      Dec 16, 2017
  • IBM kMBR58
    I think only attractive people get sexually harassed.... So no.. never experienced it.
    Dec 12, 2017 5
    • Visa woqO06
      Sorry
      Dec 12, 2017
    • IBM kMBR58
      You are sorry that I've never been sexually harassed? lol... Jk but nah, it's ok.
      Dec 12, 2017
    • Expedia
      OekY75

      Expedia

      PRE
      eBay
      OekY75more
      Sexual harassment and assault has to do with power, not attraction. Please don’t spread BS like this.
      Dec 12, 2017
    • Visa woqO06
      Sorry, i read ur post as if you missing out on the harassment part :d, my bad. Hope this "sorry" doesn't means some kind of harassment :/
      Dec 13, 2017
    • Microsoft yuu
      You don't have to be very hot.
      Dec 13, 2017
  • New =^..^=
    I wasn’t at my old job for very long but there was this one guy, a “Bro”, and we became drinking buddies. Him, his TL and our DIR used to go to the gym together and sometimes out for drinks. Good team. “Bro” used to be super inappropriate sometimes. Among other things he’d pretend to slap his dick on stuff like the desk or wall, say things like “what’s wrong, your labia sore?” And he called everyone “Girl” because he thought it was demeaning.
    I was asked to give a team member feedback on him and send it to his TL. I thought it was confidential so I put something good, something he could improve on and at the bottom I put “You know how he does that thing where he pretends to slap his, um, er, dick on everything? Yeah, I could really do without that”. I said it to be funny, and also, HOW DID THEY JUST LET HIM DO THAT!?!?
    Turns out, the form that I submitted wasn’t confidential and would be automatically put on his electronic employee record.
    Long story short, 3 weeks later I got a letter of reprimand for calling in sick after my start time ( Bro and I called in sick, I was legit sick and Bro was hungover)playing a phone game with Bro during a break at our desks and talking about being hungover with Bro. The letter was officially for “Poor Professional Appearance”
    Bro got a >10k raise+bonus and got to go to San Diego for a “work trip”
    It was HR that gave me the letter. They knew about the dick thing, too.
    QL Detroit - I found a new job with a 17k raise 6 months later so fuck that place.
    Dec 12, 2017 3
    • Google / Eng gainz4dayz
      "Bro" sounds like a dope dude which is probably why you didn't mind being drinking buddies with him.
      Dec 12, 2017
    • Credit Karma Johmy
      And google here sounds like a dick that needs to be slapped around.
      Dec 13, 2017
    • Blippar anonymous+
      =^..^= - You have an essay a few replies before where you claim that all men are rapists who "want to jerk off on your face"!

      And of all your co-workers, 'bro' - who was super inappropriate all the time - became your drinking buddy? And you still think he's 'cool', and just made the mentioned comment in your feedback form to be funny?

      Poor life choices. Not my problem. There are shitty men and shitty women everywhere. People who face a problem must grow up and act responsibly to fix the problem first, before asking independent third parties for help and support.
      Dec 17, 2017
  • Amazon aCqz14
    If I had a dollar for each time I'm asked "so how come you're in computer science?" or the cheesier version "so what is a pretty girl like you doing in computer science?" I'd be a millionaire.
    Dec 13, 2017 1
    • Visa Zarkon
      So what is a pretty girl like you doing in Computer Science?
      Dec 14, 2017
  • This comment was deleted by original commenter.

    • Tableau / Eng
      SloppyJoe

      Tableau Eng

      PRE
      Microsoft, IBM
      SloppyJoemore
      Sucks. They should have moved him out of Amazon instead.
      Dec 14, 2017
  • Microsoft Khcfdshl
    #metoo I've been sexually assaulted since I was a boy! And it continues to this day! Can anyone help me? How can I file charges against my left hand?
    Dec 12, 2017 3
    • Amazon / Eng
      Dgwq42

      Amazon Eng

      PRE
      Oracle
      Dgwq42more
      You sir are an asshole
      Dec 12, 2017
    • Microsoft / Eng
      MP3

      Microsoft Eng

      BIO
      Troll living under the I-5 overpass
      MP3more
      You can use your right hand to thumb-wrestle the other into submission and take it to the cops. Make sure they cuff your left arm onto something while you use your right one to write a police report.

      Please report how it goes. And make a video, I want that sweet revenge porn.
      Dec 12, 2017
    • CA Technologies / Sales lBqw66
      Your left hand should evaluate your next promotion and raise.
      Dec 27, 2017
  • Google / Eng
    Kitty🐱

    Google Eng

    PRE
    HP Inc, Geek Squad, Genentech, Symantec, Wells Fargo, Best Buy, Google, Gilead Sciences, milestonepowered, milestonetech
    BIO
    Contract work has me career redirected. 😎
    Kitty🐱more
    I predict many triggered style responses. 😉
    Dec 12, 2017 1
    • Amazon JefeBezito
      Alright James Damore simmer down
      Dec 12, 2017
  • Amazon aCqz14
    I notice that for a lot of male engineers, my idea has to be repeated to them by another male engineer, before they will seriously consider it.
    Dec 14, 2017 0
  • Microsoft / Product Nope no no
    Yes. I’m told I’m too pretty to be in IT. I’m asked why I bother doing this work when I can easily find a sugar daddy. I’m asked if I’m using my husband’s Prime card. My Hackathon laptop stickers cause confusion.
    It’s so annoying.
    Dec 13, 2017 0
  • Salesforce FgGP13
    Had a south Asian male coworker, I’m guessing closeted gay, who I do know had a very young arranged marriage (he was quite young that is), who was regularly what I’d consider overly comfortable (hand on arm frequently, etc). I got a “he likes me” vibe but asked another Indian coworker about it, and was told that Indian male friends are often closer than here in the USA (holding hands, etc). The clue that it was more than a platonic interest was when he gave me a big kiss on the mouth in the parking lot. So yeah, not a hardcore assault, and I actually feel a little bad for the guy, but totally unwanted and unappreciated.
    Dec 12, 2017 0
  • Microsoft dyermaker
    I am objectified as a provider by women. All the men out there earning over $200k know what I'm talking about. It's cold and demeaning, knowing that the size of your bank account is what women are really most interested in. Whip out a credit card to pay for lunch, they'll be looking for carbon. Shoes and watches used to be what caught their eyes, but counterfeits are so common that today's enlightened woman ignores them. What can we as a nation do to counteract this predatory behavior and make well employed men feel safe again?
    Dec 14, 2017 3
    • Microsoft / Eng
      MP3

      Microsoft Eng

      BIO
      Troll living under the I-5 overpass
      MP3more
      Sex robots who look 10/10 AND can cook dinner.
      Dec 14, 2017
    • IBM jh232
      You can stop characterizing women in general when expressing your experience...
      Dec 14, 2017
    • CA Technologies / Sales lBqw66
      Are you serious. Really. You think so little of women that it’s either you or them?

      Just because women have to put up with shit doesn’t diminish what you have accomplished. It’s not an either/or.

      I think the current climate is way OTT fwiw so I understand the frustration.
      Dec 27, 2017
  • Flagged by the community.

  • Microsoft tolegit🥃
    At Microsoft, yes. It was humiliating and it cost me my career, my home, my savings, my dignity. I lost everything and the moment I regret the most is when i went to HR to complain about the sexual predator, harrassment and abuse i was experiencing. HR turned on me and not only allowed the abuse to continue, but blamed me and fired me.
    Dec 13, 2017 3
    • Microsoft Emergeee
      Sounds like Microsoft, I’d like to see them get sued and slapped around more.
      Dec 13, 2017
    • Roku priu
      Was the hr a male? Should have gone with some evidence.
      Dec 13, 2017
    • CA Technologies / Sales lBqw66
      I have 20 years of experience and this is why I would never ever report anything to HR.
      Dec 27, 2017
  • Google Linkedin
    Dec 13, 2017 2
    • Microsoft M$FTEE
      ‘Man’kind truly is scraping the bowl
      Dec 13, 2017
    • Snapchat dicaboo
      You’re fucked up for this.
      Dec 13, 2017