In China, they used to say depression is for lazy kids. I struggled, got a bachelors in hard sciences, moved to America for masters in CS and landed a job at amazon. Did all the right things, been here 2 years (6mos in a new team) and now I got a pivot document and my appeal is Thursday. I felt appealing would help but blind suggests otherwise. Should I go into the pip or take severance and move back and reflect. I don't know what i did wrong. 12hr/5 days a week and weekend oncalls. did it all. gave it all. I'm feeling very low and don't know what to do. I'm even questioning my purpose, this seems surreal. This is the first time I'm facing a failure of this size and I'm inept to face it. Thank you blind community for your support
You need to smoke some weed bro and get some pussy.
Failure makes us stronger my friend. Accept that youāre depressed and donāt judge it, but also donāt let it be your identity. Would going back to China be that bad? You worked at Amazon Iām sure you can get a job at a lot of places.
Really?? I assume both are super easy to get in China. Also a shorter fight to Thailand
Just move jobs
Depression is very real. I suggest you go see a counselor (Iām aware that in China this isnāt a really a thing). Iām sure you can find another job, Amazonās attrition rate is extremely high, and thereās reason for that. Keep your head up and reach out to people for help.
Take it easy..
Since you're in Amazon, it's most likely not you. Amazon's a shitty place. My last team kicked 1 guy out cause we were over hired. He wasn't that bad, definitely not bad enough to get fired. Amazon doesn't give a shit about employees. Get out. It's not you. This is a good thing. Don't work any more, prepare and get out of here.
Because itās not all about hard work, itās also a factor of if the right people like you, etc.
I went through PIP in 2016 and cleared it..I had good feedback this year. If you want to talk personal messge me. I went through stressful times as I have family and mortgage, but then I looked up all that got me into this situation and started working towards it and got back and cleared it. Luckily my manager supported me and I ensured I did frequenct interactions with him as well. I dod lose a lot on my pay hike and grants though. Dont get taken away with this, there are things you can control and things you cant. Believe in yourself and find another job or role.
Very sorry to hear. Since youāre already in Amazon, it should be fairly easy to line up interviews. Iād say be prepared and move on. This aināt end of life. Once you move on from this situation, youāll gain lot of confidence.
Fuuuk Amazon. Take the pip and interview until u get a new job.
Agree with this and also would suggest finding a good therapist. You need help with your mental state before you can truly launch in other areas of your life.