Am I burnt out?
This is a serious post… I’ve been in the company for 5 years. Starting as E3 and I’m now E5, I’ve experienced ups and downs with all above average ratings, and also bad manager screwing me up one or two times. I love coding and solving technical problems. I used to be curious about learning both tech and communication skills to play the impact game. I can make nice looking posts and signal boosting for visibility. But I’m no longer interested in doing so. 1. This might be the most important depression: I had a hard time getting to E5 due to a bad manager and once I’m at E5, I don’t know what’s the next “career goal”. E6 is interesting but not attractive to me anymore. 2. Money wise I’m making less than 300K and I don’t think GE or MA makes any difference in terms of after tax income. Also I parked enough cash for mortgage and living cost for 2 years. So getting fired is not a concern. 3. Technique wise, I’m very familiar with most of the prod stack: composing features is now playing with LEGO bricks to me. It’s no more challenging or enjoyable but boring. 4. People wise, since I’m not that into promotion, so I’m not doing ambitious work. I’m seeing other e5 at team doing directional and people work. I don’t want to block them, but since I’m not gaining credits, I’m not contributing as well. It’s like collaboration is helping others but not myself, so I get rid of collaboration especially the delegation from higher level folks. So seems like I’m a coaster. It’s okay to call me a coaster or anything. I only work for 2-3 hours a day and I haven’t done anything since this Monday. My current state of mind is: do the minimal and shoot for MA; I’m happy to get PIP plan with a package; I just don’t want to move for a single step in the current work. BTW I just changed to a new team so team changing won’t help. I’m thinking how to get out of such mentally ill situation. Shall I change company? Shall I take some time off to get some recharge? It’s really frustrating that I’m now hating the job which was my dream when I was a kid. Shall I change my mindset but how?
You’ve made it high enough that you could coast and experience life outside of work more.
But it’s not sustainable. Either I’ll pick up the backlog or I’ll get fired. Without the problem solved, it’ll be even harder to tackle new challenges in the near future.
I would say now is about finding balance rather than rapid growth. You don’t always need to be reaching a higher level, you can just do your current job well enough
This is burn out. Suggest take a break. Maybe a month vacation and revisit this later.
Take time off. Travel and do hobbies/don’t look at work at all. Come back with a fresh mind/fresh start. It happens to everyone. There are cycles where you’re motivated and cycles where you’re just bored or moving along
You probably need work that has more than just a monetary value attached to it. Try using your skills to help nonprofits or build solutions to problems you see out in the world. It's a big, mostly free world filled with inefficiencies and you have a great foundation to create value!
You are in the enviable position where you can afford to fail. What do you WANT to do?
TBH my day dream is having 10 million and just retire in a small village in the Midwest with my wife. I don’t want to make a different for human beings. I don’t want to challenge myself for something I’m not good at. And all I want to do is to do the minimal and rest. I blame the company culture which makes me think in this way. It’s all about “impact” and “growth”. But one day I know there is a limit for growth and I’m no longer interested in career or money growth, I lose all the energy.
I hear you. Been there, a few years ago. Please don't give up and be hard on yourself. Everyone has a bad phase. First step towards betterment is to understand that we can't always be in our best mindset. Try to spend some time with your family. I have always experienced spending time with my family (even indoors) have helped come out of my rut. Motivation is overrated. Don't feel pressured to find motivation. If it has to be pressured then it's not real motivation. Lay back, do something which you haven't done in a while viz. Gardening, singing, playing an instrument, painting, may be playing a sport, etc. I wish you all the best. You got it, buddy!
Talk about bad fucking timing! Zuck is expecting increased output from you folks, but coasting/vacation is what you need right now.
You lack motivation because it’s so easy you’re bored at work. You need work that’s outside of your comfort zone. You said you like solving technical problems. You need a problem you can’t solve easily.
I agree I’m working the comfort zone. But I can’t resonate why working outside of the zone will help: if I’m not gaining happiness and joy in the new area, but putting more time and effort without achieving anything, wouldn’t that be even worse?
No, I’m speaking after reading research by Adam Grant on what motivates people in his book give and take. I recommend read that and also Think Again by him. You’ll understand. You need a challenge and if you also add a strong purpose, you’ll get motivation back. You have all the resources you need to come up with a great idea and execute it.
You looks like burned out. Go to doctor. It’s not something can be fixed by vacation or by changing project. It cause motivation to do something f. Just change company will not help. Worse case scenario - change industry and start from scratch.
TC?
In the 6th paragraph.