Dealing with OCD?

Oct 18, 2019 13 Comments

I think my spouse has minor form of OCD. We have to wash everything that comes to this house. If we have a guest which is a rare case we need to clean every thing that they touch. All because of germs. We use hand sanitizer whenever we want to eat out. I lived with this person for 8 years and we always argued on this problem. He washes his hands for 20 seconds each time when touches some thing like onion or dirty dishes. We had a child recently and he promised as always that he will do less of hands washing. Whenever I call for his help for emergency situations with the baby he says I am coming and start to wash his hands. Things are a bit better now but he tends to regress and do the same and I have to watch him like an eagle each time to give him notice to not to over washing and to stop giving me order on how to do dishes or cook or clean the house. His attitude makes me to be an angry person to shout at him each time he starts this and I use bad words when talking to him because I can't change him and he keeps repeating it and I feel powerless so I open my mouth :( he gets upset by my behavior. he refuses to go to therapy saying all people in us are dirty and nobody believe in me. He keeps reading health related news like someone got killed by a dog that licked him and basically germs are eveywhere and you should listen to me. His mother is kind of the same but a bit better but when I got married I thought they are doing this because the mother is a nurse and he has doctorate degree so they know better than my family and indeed we should be more careful to not to get sick.
My family have no idea but recently they got a feeling that he has ocd.. I don't know how to continue. His family knew and everytime I brought this up they told him to not to do but he doesnt listen.


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TOP 13 Comments
  • Amazon popozao
    Go to therapy together. While he has OCD, you are also having relationship troubles because of it and your response to it.

    Going together makes it a “we have a problem” rather than “you are the problem”.
    Oct 18, 2019 1
  • T-Mobile / Finance tk3m6w
    Hey has a psychological sickness. He will only get worse. He must agree to therapy and medication or he will destroy all the things.
    Oct 18, 2019 0
  • Just let the baby pee/shit on him and he will change.
    Actually it’s from personal experience. I was like 25% of him I guess. But not any more 😂😂
    Oct 18, 2019 0
  • Tesla ashcid
    This is definitely a case of OCD. I've suffered from OCD for more than 6 years. Washing hands excessively is a classic symptom of OCD. I also initially was hesitant to go to therapy but believe me it helps a lot. I've changed a lot since i've started to go to therapy.

    On top of therapy people suffering from OCD need a lot of help from their family to get through it. You shouting at him is not going to help in any way. You have to understand that he's suffering from a mental illness and support him through this journey of getting better. But getting better is not going to be possible without getting therapy. That will have to be done or your situation will continue to deteriorate. Please believe me in this and ask him to get therapy.

    Also you calling out his obsessions is just going to increase his anxiety and put him in a worse place. Observe silently and nudge him when it's getting excessive.

    Many companies provide access to Lyra which is specifically to get therapy for mental illnesses. Upto 25 sessions are free. Please use this if he has it. Feel free to DM me if there are other things you'd like to know. It's not easy to get through this but it can be done.
    Oct 18, 2019 0
  • Cisco / Eng t2d5aze
    I agree, he needs therapy.
    Oct 18, 2019 0
  • New FzgP70
    Wow some one has a Microsoft spouse . You guys must be together very rich .
    Oct 18, 2019 3
    • SAP wmmpd
      Are you new around here?
      Oct 18, 2019
    • New FzgP70
      No I have been here for close to two and half years . First two years are gone in waiting for work authorisation . It’s too late now .
      Oct 18, 2019
    • SAP wmmpd
      Too late for what?

      Also, my comment was not really to know since when you are in the US, but more like since when you are on Blind/ familiar with Tech salaries. As both spouses in Tech/ MS does not really seem like a talking point to me.
      Oct 19, 2019
  • Facebook JKcR82
    My spouse has OCD, it's a serious and severe illness than people imagine it to be. Goto a clinic which treats OCD. If ur in bay area, goto Roger's behavioral health in walnut creek area, they have 4 to 6 weeks programs and the best part is they accept insurance. Do it asap. Most of OCD therapists don't accept insurance, and they are very expensive
    Oct 19, 2019 0
  • Microsoft
    Tier 1


    #1 in Prestige
    Tier 1more
    That’s OCD alright and it’s not a minor case.
    Oct 19, 2019 0
  • Ameriprise Financial kdr41
    Most OCD is not just about being clean. Try to point out other obsessive behaviors that he exhibits when convincing him to go to therapy.
    Oct 18, 2019 0


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