I haven't been doing well mentally, got on the wrong team with work I'm not interested in and have a bad relationship with my manager. He's out to get me and putting me on the chopping block. I can't transfer because my last perf feedback wasn't good. The writing is on the wall. I wouldn't mind getting fired from any other company but Google is one of the best employers in most places with less tech presence. If I don't want to live in the Bay Area or Seattle, I'm closing the door for one of the best companies in terms of wlb. Even LA and Boston don't have many competitors and especially Europe and Asia. I know that I don't want to work in Bay Area or Seattle. I'm not a very driven guy and can't last at cutthroat companies. I feel like the world is crashing down on me. I'm either taking a large hit in wlb, income, or location. I don't know what to do now. I can't help letting this affect me mentally either. I'm just worrying about this all day everyday and losing sleep over it. I can't even concentrate on interview prep. I'm trying to enjoy things watching some show I used to enjoy and just can't. And honestly I don't have much of a support system. Being the person who "works at Google" is the only thing I ever had going for me.
You’re asking us what’s next but it’s obvious you need to work on your mental health? What do you want us to say?
Google on your CV will help a lot with finding jobs in other high paying tech companies and jobs.
Yeah just get a full remote job from similar to FAANG like Dropbox or Lyft.
Ease it off
Do not quit. It’s better to be fired. Funemployment can give OP time to recover. I’d also recommend self-admitting to good psychiatric hospital and having family or a friend complete their weekly job cert for them.
Also join your Women@Google group and try to establish yourself as a leader there. No way they're firing a women@ exec.
take FMLA
Some people do that then get fired out of no where. Cant really risk that. I would say do PTO and interview prep
Isn’t that illegal if it’s for a mental disability?
Therapy is your move. I just left Google and I know how hard it can be to catch up when behind. I had a similar struggle but got out before the bad perf snd got a better manager. I got mental health help and diagnosis that help flip everything around. You aren’t fired yet. Get mental health help ASAP. If you need it, request a leave of absence. Don’t give up on yourself.
Find a mental health professional to work with. Best of luck OP
I had a very hard times lately also- all from working issues. 3 weeks ago my good friend died of covid ( girl the same age as me) and left a kid behind. I realized that i spent all my energy and life recently not on the right things. You are not “only a guy” who work at google. you have family i suppose, you can take care of other things. But first see the doctor to get some meds. Being fired is not a mistake-as soon as you learn smth from it.
You’re not fired yet. And i think you can still learn from your mistakes!