For working moms - How many kids?
I have one little kid. It’s a lot of work already, but feeling pressured to have another. Would it be too miserably tough to be a working mom of 2 OR it’d be ok?
If you have two it’s twice the work. But if you have three it’s only a little bit more effort.
After 3, it doesn’t matter. Just have 10 more and start a village
I don't have time for my parents. my kids, should I have any, won't have any time for me. so it all feels like wasted effort.
Don't have another kid just cause of pressure, do what you want
Going from one to two kids initially was a little harder when the youngest was still an infant, but once she got old enough to play with the other kid things became way easier than with one child. A lot of other parents that have two and three children have said the same thing to me. They play together and the older one teaches the younger one all sorts of things that we had to teach her. For us the only thing we found harder long term is the amount of money it costs to enroll two children in daycare, and even that will end for us in a few years, meanwhile we've both been able to keep advancing our careers and getting pay increases the entire time. I'm sure once they get old enough to start extracurricular activities that might be a little tougher too, but who knows, by then maybe we'll have enough to retire.
From the kids perspective, it helps if they have a sibling, they will spend time among themselves and you will have more time, when they are, say 4+ yrs. Also with a sibling bond and understanding they can count on each other when you are no longer living.
Don't have a kid _you_ don't want.
I guess it depends on the age gap too
I am a working mother of 2. I am a planner so that helps. I think more than 2 kids a parent usually ends up staying home because of child care costs. A big part of it is how supportive and flexible your manager is.