While traveling in Asia, I was chatting with this consultant who spoke English well, not surprising as they have studied abroad. However, they had to return back to their home countries though they didn't like it. I asked them why did they return? They said they wish they grew up in the USA because they couldn't adjust. And there were many cases like theirs, even some of college friends went back home. Then, I realized what a privilege I had, something out of your control as a kid. My parents decided to move overseas early so I grew up in my pivotal childhood years in the USA... though I was frequently bullied for being different, I learned to overcome that and gained the social skills to now be well adjusted culturally. I've been in both circles, did a lot of sports growing up, now work in tech, so learned how to talk with a wide range of people. I've noticed that Americans, even from immigrant families, don't generally mix with immigrants. And if you have an accent (unless British or Australian), they will even more quickly regard you as part of the "out" group. If my parents decided to come at a later time, I may never feel like I fit in here. Learning the language is the easy part, learning the social culture is real challenge. This is such a huge unspoken privilege that no one talks about.
It just depends. There are immigrant families in the USA with first generation kids who are more conservative and removed from American culture than their immigrant counterparts from their home country. It comes down to how much exposure and freedom your parents let you have while growing up.
Even if that's the case, they're still much better adjusted than someone who is a college school immigrant
Don’t think so. I just think Americans in general have a stigma towards Asian accents which makes it harder to meld in. Especially in situations like dating, classroom groups, etc. But the individual themselves (accent apart) are more similar - pop culture, political views, fashion sense, food habits, activities, movies, music, etc.
IMO, This difference applies a lot more in dating / friends/personal relationship situations than professional
Agreed if you're in tech (immigrant friendly), but a huge advantage in those affected areas.
Worst is being half and half. You never fit in either culture and go in and out between them
Yeah, being raised here feels more like 70/30. If I was here at late teens it'd be 50/50.
Oh I meant being half half races and growing half there and half in usa.
Yes and it is much worse for Americans trying to live abroad. Once you have a certain set of skills and nostalgia from your childhood, you will always crave it
Exactly, but at least what I crave for is to live in the US, which is still less competitive than places like India
As an American, I have tons of immigrant friends and have never thought twice about that making a difference as to whether I should be friends with them.
You are one person, but think about their experience of how many Americans they encounter who are not like that.
Idk, think about how many Americans are also like me. Just saying I don’t think it’s a broad characterization that needs to be painted. But I’m sorry for those who have felt left out by Americans. I guess some people in all cultures tend to stick with people like themselves. Some, but not all.
Or you can learn the culture as well when you land. It’s all up to you. Served me well.
You can learn it but true integration is incredibly difficult without the right conditions. And as an immigrant to a white space is much harder than the reverse.
True. Not everyone can learn culture and have a grasp on it. But I remember, in my assimilation, I had to study up on baseball, football, basketball, the professional leagues, major holidays and their traditions, customs and norms of daily life, traditions of life events, political parties and their pillars, american church branches. I even bought a book on “american idioms” and studied it cover to cover. Etc 😂
Oh cry me a fucking river
I'm not crying at my own fortune lol
I don't understand how this poll is slow tight. Growing up in America gives an incredible leg up as an adult in America. The vocabulary, the idioms, understanding of Americanisms are much easier for someone who grew up in America earlier. Even for Indians who widely speak English, American English is too different. American sentence structure is different, norms are different and reading between the lines is difficult. For other Asian immigrants, it's sometimes harder because the language itself is difficult to comprehend for older folks.
Right!! I think a lot of them are immigrants raised overseas in denial of this privilege or clueless Americans (not immigrants) who are unaware. From having immigrant parents I am acutely aware compared how they're stuck socially vs my friends with first or second gen parents raised here.
A lot of immigrants live in their immigrant bubble, especially tech workers. They haven't lived in the vast majority of America where their accent, appearance and inability to understand Americanism prevents them from integration and success. All that said, the world has certainly become smaller. Tbh, gen z immigrants and gen z Americans are closer to each other than with millennials of either stock.
Why is it not a privilege to grow up wherever you’re from?
Dunno, I’m fine, 10+ years here
Who are your predominant friends?
To your point, I hardly find Americans in my area. Only older people.