Need Suggestions about being discriminated by direct manager
This woman joined the team and became my manager. Since then, she started treating me super harshly by ignoring me, not supporting me, being picky on me. I believe I’m a tough girl, but she made me cried at work 3 times and people in my team noticed that she treats me specifically harsh. I reported to my director and HR. They said they were on my side and hoped me and manager work it out. However, it got even worse. She lied about me not noticing her of my vocation, stopped me from doing my OKRs, said I’m only allowed to do the assigned tasks, micro managing me, only talk to me when HR is at present. I couldn’t bear it, so I applied to transfer to another team. The new team’s manager helped me get all approvals. When we are about to start relocation/visa process, my manager said I don’t know what to New team’s director. So my transfer got canceled. Right on the next day, she put me on PIP. I have a EE rating in latest perf. I tried to negotiate with her, to let my tech lead be part of the process. My manager is a people manager, she doesn’t know much about technology. If my tech lead will be the one to estimate my work, I’m 200% confident to pass the PIP. However, she’s the only one. The 7.5 months’ torture caused a relapse of my depression and, introduced a new thing, anxiety. So, I started a short term disability leave after finished the first project in PIP. I’m the only feminist girl in my team. She supported other colleagues, guys, basically, on daily work, promotion blabla, but not me. Could anybody give me some suggestions on how to deal with this issue? Is there anything else I can do? I’m on H1B tho. :(.
Just throw "discrimination" card , you will be fine through pip.
OK. Thanks
Have you tried having conversations with skip level?
I talked to manager’s manager, but he didn’t do anything. At the beginning, he said he’s on my side, but he refused to move me to another relevant sub team. After a few weeks, he started interpreting my manager’s ridiculous saying into good ways. So, it didn’t work. And putting me on PIP need to go through him firstly I guess.
The director hired my manager. So I guess maybe that’s why.
There is a good chance you stepped on her toe without knowing, and she took it personally and negatively. This sometimes happens when your manager is new to the technical domain and something you did made him/her insecure about the lack of domain expertise. Often times these managers choose to focus on what their comfort zone, even if it is not the best way to support the team. Your colleagues are likely to have played the nice person card well, without making the new manager feel insecure. I have seen it a few times around me (female non-technical manager-female technical report). The takeaway is that new manager on boarding is a highly political and time consuming affair, and you will look for cues better next time. As for you, 1) take time off and decompress for 2 weeks and 2) see if your condition improves. If it does, then you need to get a new job. They won't be able to fire you while you are on short term disability, so you need to come up with a game plan. Once you are back to work, you need to buy yourself time until you find a new job. Appease your manager "intentionally" as part of your strategy so you don't get fired, but interview hard and escape asap. Good luck.
Great advice.
Thanks! I guess getting a new job is the only way to get rid of that manager. I’m not sure if there’s anything else I could do to speak up for myself.
Since internal transfer hasn't worked out for you, the only recourse is look outside ... You're from Google ... That should automatically open a few doors and getting another job will not be a problem for you. Managers play a huge role in employee's development and well being, so if she has clearly showed that she doesn't care for your progress then sadly it's time to quit. There are plenty of other good companies where you will be appreciated and can have a good career.
Yes. This is the first time I ever have such a manager. Thanks!
What companies to go after google?
I had a female tyrant of a manager. I put up with her micromanaging, crabby ways for a minute and found another job. The market is too good to be annoying people.
Make sense. Thanks!
Please sue her. She needs to be taught a lesson. Consult an attorney and start building a solid case.
OP is on H1B. You are suggesting her to sue her employer (not sure you can individually sue this manager) who sponsors her visa. Even if she chooses to sue, she needs a new job at a different company to ensure her immigration status is not affected.
Yea ... It's far easier and less stressful to just find another job and quit. And there will be bad managers in every company, if we start suing every bad manager that will soon turn into a new full time job. Companies will learn the hard way by promoting bad managers and such managers will also realize the error of their ways when they lose all their good employees. It's not OPs responsibility to correct the company or teach her bad manager a lesson.
OP, your tag says Google. Are you at Amazon now but were with Google earlier?
I’m not at Amazon.
I had the same thing several years back in another company. I endured a whole year. It was hell. I escalated to upper levels, but was told that I needed to resolve the issue with him. I did two things. To protect myself, I reported him to HR for bullying, so he couldn’t put me on pip. HR said that during investigation if the manager gave me pip it’s considered retaliation and he can be terminated. Of course HR is always on the company’s side, but at least I was able to avoid pip. I don’t know if G has similar policies. Second thing was I immediately transferred out of the group. I’m sorry you are going through this, but looking back I think the ordeal made me stronger.
If nothing else, you know next go round will be much shorter than the last. I put up with an awful manager for 4 years, hoping he would leave. I left and he was fired 2 weeks later. For the next 6 years, I had decent managers until I joined a company 6 months ago. And left it about a month ago. I’ve started with a new company and things seem to be going very well, thus far. One thing I learned from all of this was to get out early and keep my sanity.
I reported to a HR but she’s on the managers’ side and they two together put me on a PIP. I got offer from other team and was about to transfer, but manager blocked my transfer and put me on PIP right on the next day.
If anyone at your current company were willing or able to help you, they already would have. Your only option now is to find a new job with another company.
There’s a manager from another team really wants me to join his team. I’ll talk to him further on how to help maybe. I don’t know. I guess finding a new job is much more easier.
It doesn’t hurt to ask him. But you should tell him that you believe your current manager has already blocked you moving to another team
“I’m the only feminist girl in my team.” Who gives af—this only goes to show that if it was a man you’d be blaming gender. Talk to her woman to woman and let her know you don’t feel valued on the team and go from there.
I did talk to her. As I wrote in the post, it went worse. However, my male colleague who took over the OKRs that are originally mine.