In a meeting with a person from another team, he ended up sharing his screen and while on screen share, when I was talking, he started typing this m*therf*ker. And his teammate yelled you are on screen share! I got extremely furious and asked his teammate to take over let us know the next steps and ended the call. After we ended the call, his teammate and I were in the same room so I kinda vented on him that this is the second time this guy have used profanity and this is totally unacceptable. He tried to explain/defend but eventually agreed that his teammate was wrong. I escalated it to my director and plan to send an email to this guy cc-ing my manager. In the email, I am going to call out actual word he used and follow up with hope we have more work related and professional conversation going forward (email is to leave a paper trail because first time he said w*f on a public channel but later edited his mesage. I have the snapshot but the original message is gone) Is that right course of action? Please comment if I should be doing something else
Does he deliver? Who cares if he says bad words, are you in kindergarten or what? I have meetings where people curse in 3 languages to express emotions.
Do they curse or use abusive words towards one person? Also, not from my team so not sure about the delivery but he ain't helpful to us been a month the ticket is open
No one should get a pass for bad behavior just because they deliver. I have worked with senior “gifted and talented” engineers who are total dicks and senior “gifted and talented” engineers who make you feel included and appreciate what you bring to the table despite the fact that what I could do he can probably do while half asleep. The humble ones are the ones respected not the dicks. When you are in a professional setting there should be some agreed upon level of mutual respect. Cussing crosses the line for me personally and I think OP is well within his rights to bring this up to his management chain. Whether the company takes it seriously or not is reflective of the overall culture of that team/company. Based on Metas response looks like they don’t care. Which tracks, given they started out as an extension of a frat at a college campus.
What cuss word is w**f ? A dog can’t bark in peace now or what ?
What the f*ck It comes off as an intimating tactics to use it on a public channel to avoid people to ask anything
I didn't escalate then but this time he called me motherf*cker
He was right, you are a mofo 😅
Care to elaborate?
Don't Meta, they will email your manager.
You should definitely report it - that's inappropriate and toxic workplace bullying behavior
And considering he was trying to push the work on our team without justifying, trying to cut off my teammate (who is kinda soft spoken) he was trying to be a bully
Absolutely. You have the right to emotional safety to work.
I was furious and had another meeting immediately after in which I was just a robot following instructions. It took a couple of hours for me to just get back to normal.
So include all that in your report. How it impacts your work, takes time away from work, impacts you emotionally and makes you feel… Sorry it happened. A lot of folks in tech are bullies. I dealt with a lot and didn’t complain. I had my own reasons though.
It needs to be reported to HR.
That's what I am bit confused about. HR reporting might bring way too much scrutiny and is it that big offense? Is it worth it?
Yes it is. This is the literal definition of verbal abuse. The company owes you a safe space. But how do they ensure it? Your responsibility is to tell them when you don’t feel safe so that they can act on it. If you don’t tell them, they have an excuse to do nothing. Hr doesn’t do as much as you might think. They will have a conversation with this person and give them a chance to change this behavior. Probably some training too explain them why this is wrong and the impact. This person might grow from it or might get more resentful. So yeah there is risk. Is on you whether you can afford the risk or not.
What's "w*f?"
What the f*ck
Wait, "wtf?" I don't think you can really be upset about "wtf"
That language is for people living on streets who don't have control over their emotions. You did right by reporting
I literally said this to a friend, does he think its a dockyard????
🙌
Grow up
Yup fully grown, responsible and professional person here
Hard to tell, I sense a lot of insecurities. Hang on it gets a lot harder
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Was he referring to you?
Yes there were 4 people(me, his teammate, my teammate, him). I was doing most of the talking/questioning.